# Toilet issues



## momo (Mar 12, 2015)

Help plz bros!

Working 18 hour days I struggle to hold on to a pee for that long.

Tried peeing into a coffee cup but only a grande size holds my wee. I overflowed on them petite cup all down my new Primarks! Lol!

I find milk and coke bottles don't fit my willy width. Don't want a customer to get with one of those stuck. Might not get my 5 stars man!

What can I do? Is there a bottle that fits all out there?


----------



## Backdash (Jan 28, 2015)

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B000NV878S/?tag=ubne0c-20
For emergencies only
and this:
When you see a place to piss go piss whether you have the urge or not.


----------



## momo (Mar 12, 2015)

Working London there is no where to pull up without getting a ticket. I even had to dump in a Tesco bag the other week. Hid the log under the passenger seat until I lobbed it out. Blamed the bad sewers whenever people asked what the smell was! Lol!


----------



## sinbad (Jan 3, 2015)

Momo its a prob,i use Oak taxi toilet if emergency but u gotta be quick-one dem ****s thru water over door or same at suffolk st but some **** thru watet dere too


----------



## momo (Mar 12, 2015)

I throw my tesco bag at them for that. Hate them clowns. Just because they got the knowledge they think they no london. I been in UK for months now and no where Harrods is. Jokers. 

I love nicking there work. Lol!


----------



## Disgusted Driver (Jan 9, 2015)

Ali G is in the house! Respect.


----------



## Goober (Oct 16, 2014)

lol...the sewers huh? your car smells like piss...


----------



## momo (Mar 12, 2015)

Lol only when I had the poo on board. Poo gone now so all smells good.


----------



## Goober (Oct 16, 2014)

I got chased out of an alley taking a piss a few months ago


----------



## Tim In Cleveland (Jul 28, 2014)

No where to go in Cleveland either. Ohio law requires gas stations to have restrooms, but not a single one in Cleveland complies! Fast food restaurants close their lobbies by 10 pm. You have to wander into a bar or leave the city to get a restroom after that. I hit the 24 hour grocery store that's in the next city.


----------



## DrJeecheroo (Feb 12, 2015)

When you gotta go, you gotta go. Thank god for 24 hr gas stations,minimarts.


----------



## Uber_X70 (Mar 12, 2015)

Hotels / Hospitals


----------



## momo (Mar 12, 2015)

DenverDiane said:


> #1. I believe Uber restricts their drivers to a 12 hour day
> #2. For that reason alone I think your post is a troll or just BS
> #3. If you can't figure out how /where to pee then you have other issues.


I don't just work for Uber. Loads of apps to sign up to and work round Uber. Also when late I just pick people off the street! Lol! just got to keep working bro. My family in Romania need the money. We all heard about Uber and had to come to UK.


----------



## XavierKnight (Dec 6, 2014)

Gatorade Bottle.. nuff said


----------



## Casuale Haberdasher (Dec 7, 2014)

DenverDiane said:


> #1. I believe Uber restricts their drivers to a 12 hour day
> #2. For that reason alone I think your post is a troll or just BS
> #3. If you can't figure out how /where to pee then you have other issues.


POST # 11/ @DenverDiane: These three

Drivers @Backdash, @momo and
@sinbad are mistakenly thinking
that they are in the London, England SubForum...SOMEHOW!

P....L....E....A....S....E
Use Conversation Feature to PM your
London colleagues. NO ONE wants to
know that your "Willy" won't fit into
the neck of a Coca-Cola bottle.

As for stashing a Grocery-Bagged Dump
under your seat until you Fling it out 
the Window... WAAAAY TOO MUCH 
INFORMATION!


----------



## Casuale Haberdasher (Dec 7, 2014)

momo said:


> I don't just work for Uber. Loads of apps to sign up to and work round Uber. Also when late I just pick people off the street! Lol! just got to keep working bro. My family in Romania need the money. We all heard about Uber and had to come to UK.


POST # 14 / @momo: I'm sure that MANY OF

YOU thought that I was being Hyperbolic 
when I joked about #[F]Uber-Hooptie and
its Attendent Ills/Communicable Diseases.

Well, I guess we have First Hand Evidence
that the "S••t has Hit the ...Floor!


----------



## biozon (Jan 6, 2015)

*momo*
I hope this is just a bad joke or bad sarcasm. You don't need to go to the toilet in your car - there are plenty of public bathrooms anywhere.


----------



## UberTaxPro (Oct 3, 2014)

someone on here gave me this a while back https://itunes.apple.com/us/app/flush-toilet-finder-public/id955254528?mt=8


----------



## bilyvh (Feb 4, 2015)

Yeah, Gatorade bottle or Vitamin Water bottles are pretty convenient to piss in.


----------



## momo (Mar 12, 2015)

I try Gatorade last night but it the same size as coke bottle here. I wee over my hands instead! Lol!

I asked my passengers all night if they know of a big bottle in the UK. What is washing conditioner? I thought hair wash was tiny.


----------



## momo (Mar 12, 2015)

biozon said:


> *momo*
> I hope this is just a bad joke or bad sarcasm. You don't need to go to the toilet in your car - there are plenty of public bathrooms anywhere.


Not in London! I can't stop. Toilets here you pay 50p to use! That is a big expense. I only wee in the Prius and only once poo in it. I'm not an animal. I usually poo in the woods.


----------



## Desert Driver (Nov 9, 2014)

momo said:


> Help plz bros!
> 
> Working 18 hour days I struggle to hold on to a pee for that long.
> 
> ...


I pee Monday, Wednesday, and Friday mornings. I drop a Cleveland steamer twice a week if the mood strikes me.


----------



## Nick3946 (Dec 12, 2014)

Try the android app FLUSH, for bathrooms around you.


----------



## anOzzieUber (Oct 31, 2014)

Pop the bonnet of your car. That bottle that holds the liquid to clean the wind screen generally holds a couple of litres. Kill two birds with one stone. Bladder empty, wind screen clean


----------



## 49matrix (Feb 3, 2015)

momo said:


> Not in London! I can't stop. Toilets here you pay 50p to use! That is a big expense. I only wee in the Prius and only once poo in it. I'm not an animal. I usually poo in the woods.


Good God! I could never relieve myself in my vehicle. Eew! I find a fast food restaurant, McDonalds, Burger King etc, if they don't have a parking lot I take a chance on street parking. I once was downtown Raleigh, where street parking is very limited and being in a state of desperation I pulled up to the downtown Marriott, told them I was Uber and picking up a package, did my thing and drove off. No questions. Bears shit in the woods, not me!


----------



## Casuale Haberdasher (Dec 7, 2014)

anOzzieUber said:


> Pop the bonnet of your car. That bottle that holds the liquid to clean the wind screen generally holds a couple of litres. Kill two birds with one stone. Bladder empty, wind screen clean


POST # 25/@anOzzieUber : That is TOO

Funny! I have to ask though... any PAX/
family/friends ask you why does your
Ride smell uh... er... So MUSKY?


----------



## momo (Mar 12, 2015)

Momo had a major problem. A passenger left a kebab in the foot well which I had. It was very hot not like from home. I was sick in my tesco bag but it has holes in. Now I have sick and wee all over my trousers lol!

How you get sick out? Fabreez not hiding smell now.


----------



## HR_tdi (Dec 18, 2014)

I make my stops at Wawa...they are all over Virginia Beach...but Norfolk they're along the east side of the city with all the pickups on the west side. So if I have to, I stop at the house, keep the app going and run in for a ten minute 'hi and bye'.

Once, I was out in the boonies of Chesapeake and couldn't hold any longer and let it go in a church parking lot.


----------



## Diesel Up (Feb 4, 2015)

I suggest buying a 64 oz. water bladder. They have a wide mouth opening. Just be sure that you screw the top back on securely!
You can buy these from REI. Yes you can buy them online, too.


----------



## ReviTULize (Sep 29, 2014)

Is this a real thread? Do adults really need to get advice on when/where to use the facilities?


----------



## momo (Mar 12, 2015)

ReviTULize said:


> Is this a real thread? Do adults really need to get advice on when/where to use the facilities?


I know where to go. I no animal. I need to go on the car. I just have not found correct bottle. Poo is fine. I put bag between seats and squeeze. Hold on to steering wheel!


----------



## momo (Mar 12, 2015)

DenverDiane said:


> It's a troll thread made by a troll and primarily responded back to by trolls


? I no understand. In Romania a troll like monster. I no monster.

This is all very sad. I come on this web page to talk to people of work. I find English hard. Sorry.

Do you speak Romanian? As vrea sa intalnesc ceilalți șoferi colegi Uber ! Vă rugăm să contactați -mă !


----------



## OCBob (Jan 20, 2015)

DenverDiane said:


> It's a troll thread made by a troll and primarily responded back to by trolls


Saw that there was a last response by DenverDiane and figured I will check out the Advice threads to see who she is *****ing about and a possible Ignore feature will be used by her. She didn't disappoint. Going after the whole lot of those who responded. Many had fun with the thread but I guess DenverDiane is here for all serious stuff, kissing UBerER's ass and putting people on ignore. Such a lovely lady I am sure.


----------



## Long time Nyc cab driver (Dec 12, 2014)

momo said:


> Help plz bros!
> 
> Working 18 hour days I struggle to hold on to a pee for that long.
> 
> ...


You really are a MOMO

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=MOMO


----------



## frndthDuvel (Aug 31, 2014)

momo said:


> Help plz bros!
> 
> Working 18 hour days I struggle to hold on to a pee for that long.
> 
> ...


Ask your Mommy!


----------



## frndthDuvel (Aug 31, 2014)

Tim In Cleveland said:


> No where to go in Cleveland either. Ohio law requires gas stations to have restrooms, but not a single one in Cleveland complies! Fast food restaurants close their lobbies by 10 pm. You have to wander into a bar or leave the city to get a restroom after that. I hit the 24 hour grocery store that's in the next city.


No Denny's? Waffle House etc?


----------



## ReviTULize (Sep 29, 2014)

Long time Nyc cab driver said:


> You really are a MOMO
> 
> http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=MOMO


Or he could be "poosty"
Seriously, read definition #2(no pun intended)
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=poosty


----------



## UberXTampa (Nov 20, 2014)

Uber_X70 said:


> Hotels / Hospitals


24 hour walmarts, walgreens


----------



## momo (Mar 12, 2015)

Long time Nyc cab driver said:


> You really are a MOMO
> 
> http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=MOMO


Lol! My name is Mo so I cslled Momo at home.


----------



## Go3Team (Aug 20, 2014)

momo said:


> I know where to go. I no animal. I need to go on the car. I just have not found correct bottle. Poo is fine. I put bag between seats and squeeze. Hold on to steering wheel!


Do you ever worry about getting dookie outside the bag?


----------



## Lidman (Nov 13, 2014)

Thank god for gas stations, dunkin donuts. wooded areas. etc.


----------



## UberXTampa (Nov 20, 2014)

For some reason the voice in my head has been sounding this thread all in very heavy British accent. especially the "poo" word.


----------



## momo (Mar 12, 2015)

Go3Team said:


> Do you ever worry about getting dookie outside the bag?


Momo never misses. Only one time the bag split.


----------



## momo (Mar 12, 2015)

UberXTampa said:


> For some reason the voice in my head has been sounding this thread all in very heavy British accent. especially the "poo" word.


In my country Romania we call a poo a rahat.


----------



## suewho (Sep 27, 2014)

Honestly momo, you're a ****ing twit. You shit in your car? Like wtf?


----------



## suewho (Sep 27, 2014)

Thats f- ing disgusting. Dont tell me this is the new standard of uber drivers........ travis would be so proud....... " i shit in my own car, so i dont miss a ping" ...... yayyyyyy


----------



## momo (Mar 12, 2015)

suewho said:


> Thats f- ing disgusting. Dont tell me this is the new standard of uber drivers........ travis would be so proud....... " i shit in my own car, so i dont miss a ping" ...... yayyyyyy


It not hurt anyone. If I could stop with no fine I would. I also need to work for my family. A rahat cost my family £5 a stop in time. I am a businessman.

Is this not normal in USA or London?


----------



## suewho (Sep 27, 2014)

Newsflash .... you're not a business man...im hoping you use paper at least.....gaaahhhh


----------



## momo (Mar 12, 2015)

suewho said:


> Newsflash .... you're not a business man...im hoping you use paper at least.....gaaahhhh


I am self employed business man of London. Uber work for me. I choose.

I wipe. I no animal!


----------



## suewho (Sep 27, 2014)

Oooooookkkkay


----------



## momo (Mar 12, 2015)

suewho said:


> Oooooookkkkay


Why you got picture of a fat lazy ferret? We are all tigers killing the taxi trade. Not lazy ferrets.


----------



## Long time Nyc cab driver (Dec 12, 2014)

UberXTampa said:


> For some reason the voice in my head has been sounding this thread all in very heavy British accent. especially the "poo" word.


I've picked up English people in my cab, I told them ironically we speak the same language, but I can't understand a word you say. 
I guess the low class English speak like that.


----------



## Long time Nyc cab driver (Dec 12, 2014)

suewho said:


> Thats f- ing disgusting. Dont tell me this is the new standard of uber drivers........ travis would be so proud....... " i shit in my own car, so i dont miss a ping" ...... yayyyyyy


Yea, I live in my car, eat, piss and shit in it. Travis loves me.
I worked with this ****ing crazy cab driver, he literally lived in his cab with his girlfriend, kept all his stuff in the trunk. He said the summer was worse than the winter. He looked like an alcoholic, he was actually a really nice guy, funny too.

Also a Canadian guy lived in his cab, one day it was cold as hell, so they said go out and see if he's still alive, lol. Nobody wanted to go and find out.


----------



## Baron VonStudley (Jun 20, 2014)

In soviet union we don't shit in car, UBER shits on US. I love thees country


----------



## Milesy (Feb 2, 2015)

Try wearing these Momo loool


----------



## suewho (Sep 27, 2014)

Gawd Milesy, now you're just encouraging him, lolololol


----------



## Mark Strobel (Jan 20, 2016)

These kits work great! Condom catheter with Leg Bag Kit, they come in different sizes. My other Uber friends and I have been using for several months. Saves on valuable time and easy to use. LOOK this up on Amazon copy and paste: Complete Kit Urinary Incontinence One-Week, 7-Condom Catheters Self-Seal External 29mm (Medium), + Premium Leg Bag 1000ml Tubing, Straps & Fast and Easy Draining


----------



## empresstabitha (Aug 25, 2016)

momo said:


> Working London there is no where to pull up without getting a ticket. I even had to dump in a Tesco bag the other week. Hid the log under the passenger seat until I lobbed it out. Blamed the bad sewers whenever people asked what the smell was! Lol!


----------



## Gobolts04 (Aug 1, 2017)

Tim In Cleveland said:


> No where to go in Cleveland either. Ohio law requires gas stations to have restrooms, but not a single one in Cleveland complies! Fast food restaurants close their lobbies by 10 pm. You have to wander into a bar or leave the city to get a restroom after that. I hit the 24 hour grocery store that's in the next city.


What happened to the river? It was common knowledge in Pittsburgh where I grew up that Cleveland didn't have indoor plumbing and everyone just shat and pi$$ed in the river..lol


----------



## KK2929 (Feb 9, 2017)

momo said:


> I try Gatorade last night but it the same size as coke bottle here. I wee over my hands instead! Lol!
> 
> I asked my passengers all night if they know of a big bottle in the UK. What is washing conditioner? I thought hair wash was tiny.


I can state with complete certainty , momo, I am extremely grateful that you do not drive in my area !!!


----------



## uberRog (Jul 1, 2017)

Gas station. Fast food restaurant. Grocery store. Heck, I've even found a port-o-potty at an empty construction site more than once when the need arises! If you need to carry a jar, you are doing something wrong.


----------



## Koolbreze (Feb 13, 2017)

idiots!


----------

