# Uber pax’s tip ?



## WhogivesAF (Dec 23, 2020)

I read with amusement on Uber news about two Aussie Uber drivers who made over $2300 in tips in one month. My first reaction was: ‘ believe this shit and you will believe anything.’ 

This was in direct contradiction to my experience. The Uber ****s that I have driven over the years would rather have their arms broken than tip. But then I thought, maybe things had changed over the nine months that I had not driven. Maybe I was getting old and cynical. Maybe I needed to keep an open mind and start smelling the roses again.

The woman who made $2350 in tips divulged her secret to customer satisfaction: “I CHAT TO THEM.” **** me ! Why hadn‘t the rest of us thought of that ? I was a bit sceptical and thought there has got to be more to this story.

It crossed my mind that maybe she had dropped her knickers and bent over the bonnet a few more times than she was willing to admit. But then, I looked at her photo and thought: “Nope, that is not it. It definitely had to be the chatting.”

Taking all the advise on board, I set out to test their suggestions. I had not driven for 9 months. I was fresh, I could provide the first class service required. Hell ! I could even pretend I liked the mother****ers and enjoyed their company.

I started work at 2.30pm on Christmas Day ( my birthday). Every **** I had in the car left happy. One woman threw up on the side of the road. I even wasted my tissues on her. She was so grateful for my understanding. I finished at 2.37 am. End result; not one ****ing tip.

So much for that “crock of shit”. The next time you hear the Mulder‘s and Neophytes of this world lay claim to that shit; tell them to shove it where the monkey shoved his nut.


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