# Account deactivation challenge



## reg barclay (Nov 3, 2015)

Imagine a billionaire offers you $10 million if you can get your account deactivated within 5 days, while adhering to the rules below, how would you go about it?

You are not allowed to:

Insult pax, their family or friends.
Say anything racist or sexist.
Break any traffic laws or do anything illegal.
Flirt, or make any sexual advances toward pax.
Modify your vehicle or deliberately make it dirty.
Use bad language.
Discuss controversial topics.


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## Lissetti (Dec 20, 2016)

*Bring along a pet....*


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## TemptingFate (May 2, 2019)

Don't shower.


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## 1.5xorbust (Nov 22, 2017)

Drive as slowly as you possibly can without breaking the law.


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## Seamus (Jun 21, 2018)

Whoops I just rammed into a light pole. After that I got nervous and while backing off the pole I accidentally backed into a parked car. Called an ambulance and the police and for the pax "safety" I put on the child safety locks and told the pax they couldn't leave the car until the ambulance and the police came. Then just to be sure I would upload my dash cam video onto Youtube using the pax name and title it "Funny Uber pax reactions to minor fender bender and safety lock in"

While it goes to the edge I see no law broken. Where's my 10 million?


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## 25rides7daysaweek (Nov 20, 2017)

reg barclay said:


> Imagine a billionaire offers you $10 million if you can get your account deactivated within 5 days, while adhering to the rules below, how would you go about it?
> 
> You are not allowed to:
> 
> ...


Ide pull out my tallywhacker 
and whack it silently
If that didnt work
ide use my pee cup
If that didnt work ide
Dip my balls i the salsa.....


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## Seamus (Jun 21, 2018)

1.5xorbust said:


> Drive as slowly as you possibly can without breaking the law.


That literally describes every Uber TLC driver in NYC!


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## VanGuy (Feb 15, 2019)

Best Rainman impersonation.


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## MHR (Jul 23, 2017)

Don’t do anything other than pick up at address entered and drop off at address entered. 

Pax hate that especially when they can’t figure out how to change it themselves.

No more oh sure, I’ll drop you off at the entrance a mile away from your original destination.

Oh sorry, you really wanted to go the SAT airport instead of ABIA. No can do. 

Wait, you wanted the outfitter that provides you with a 5 hour float instead of 2 hours. A’int happening my friend. 

And if I wanted to get done in 2 days and have a 3 day vacation I’d just refuse to transport all their coolers.


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## Trafficat (Dec 19, 2016)

reg barclay said:


> Imagine a billionaire offers you $10 million if you can get your account deactivated within 5 days, while adhering to the rules below, how would you go about it?
> 
> You are not allowed to:
> 
> ...


I'd make sure to drive to the most leftist area I am allowed to operate in while legally open carrying a large firearm. I'd pickup a habit of smoking cigarettes and drive while smoking. I would drive wearing nothing other than a diaper, a pair of cowboy boots, sunglasses, a ski mask, and my large bandoleer holster for my large handgun. I would be sure not to bathe. In some areas you might not be able to open carry or drive while masked, but at a minimum you can refuse to shave or comb your hair. I'd keep the windows rolled down on the highway. I'd play really annoying music and refuse to turn it off, or to adjust the volume up or down. I'd not use the air conditioning during the summer and not use the heater during the winter. I'd insist every passenger has his seat belt on before we drive, and refuse children who do not have child seats. I would never adjust any seat nor provide any assistance in the adjustment of any seat. I would never help with luggage. I would make sure to pick up every person who angrily yells at me on the phone for being late to pick them up. When people put in the wrong pickup location on the app, I'd drive halfway across town to pick them up instead of collecting the cancel fees, except when the wrong pickup location is across the street, in which case I'd tell the passenger they have to walk over to me and get in because I can only pick up from the location in the app. I'd forbid my passengers from having open containers and from vaping in the car. I'd request that any departure from the path on the app is changed on their end.

If they were waiting on a red curb I'd call them and tell them to walk over to me at the nearest legal pickup point. I'd refuse to drop passengers off on red curbs. I'd refuse to do illegal U-turns. I would not exceed the speed limit by even 1 mph, even if they were in a hurry. I'd answer all questions with one word responses and never smile. I'd drive until I hit the 16 hour limit each day.

Most likely you would be deactivated quickly for violating the weapons policy, but if not, you could certainly be deactivated for low rating with these tactics pretty quickly.


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## Uber_Yota_916 (May 1, 2017)

Use Twitter to blast both companies until they deactivated my accounts.


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## 911 Guy (Feb 8, 2018)

I could get deactivated within 3 rides. I won't say anything to break the rules, but all words out of my mouth would be slurred.


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## Stevie The magic Unicorn (Apr 3, 2018)

Slurring speech and stumbling around like a drunk


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## Trafficat (Dec 19, 2016)

911 Guy said:


> I could get deactivated within 3 rides. I won't say anything to break the rules, but all words out of my mouth would be slurred.


Does a temporary deactivation count as success? Because if not, you might fail because you'll be temporarily deactivated and thus unable to get yourself permanently deactivated in the alloted time frame. It might work though if you can convince all three of the pax to complain. My concern is that some may not complain and you might only get one complaint that comes through.


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## HonoluluHoku (Jul 2, 2019)

I’d put some generic pills and capsules of various types of OTC medication in a prescription bottle, shake a few out at the beginning of every trip, swallow them dry, and giggle maniacally while saying, “THESE’ll be fun!”

Pull away from curb and drive like usual, interspersed with barking and vague arm-waving at imaginary bats.


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## 911 Guy (Feb 8, 2018)

Trafficat said:


> Does a temporary deactivation count as success? Because if not, you might fail because you'll be temporarily deactivated and thus unable to get yourself permanently deactivated in the alloted time frame. It might work though if you can convince all three of the pax to complain. My concern is that some may not complain and you might only get one complaint that comes through.


Good point, but I figured Algo would go permanent automatically for three consecutive reports.


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## Trafficat (Dec 19, 2016)

25rides7daysaweek said:


> Ide pull out my tallywhacker
> and whack it silently
> If that didnt work
> ide use my pee cup
> ...


Unfortunately, I'm pretty sure all those things fall under "illegal"


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## 25rides7daysaweek (Nov 20, 2017)

Trafficat said:


> Unfortunately, I'm pretty sure all those things fall under "illegal"


I'm not a lawyer but I dont think they are illegal if the pax cant see anything LOL
Deactivation most certainly but criminal?
I think a good lawyer would want video
or at the very least pictures...


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## Jufkii (Sep 17, 2015)

Tried a few years ago to get deactivated without success. Uber used to be real anal about cancellation rates at the time..As soon as you got over 10% you were usually toast. One day I cancelled around 10 rides out of 12..The other 2 I drove off in the opposite direction after accepting the ride till the pax cancelled. One took 45 minutes to cancel. . Was positive that would do the trick. A week or so later later I got a canned message about my low acceptance rate but no mention of cancellations. That was it. Maybe they were desperate for ants at the time. It happened right after the 2016 rate cuts when they lost a lot of drivers right away ..Otherwise no clue..


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## Trafficat (Dec 19, 2016)

More good tactics:
- Have your friend ride with you in the passenger seat.
- If you are lucky enough for the selfie challenge, make your friend take the selfie!


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## Amos69 (May 17, 2019)

reg barclay said:


> Imagine a billionaire offers you $10 million if you can get your account deactivated within 5 days, while adhering to the rules below, how would you go about it?
> 
> You are not allowed to:
> 
> ...


Go to the Taco Bell drive thru! I'd be deactivated by 11:00 pm!


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## MiamiKid (May 24, 2016)

reg barclay said:


> Imagine a billionaire offers you $10 million if you can get your account deactivated within 5 days, while adhering to the rules below, how would you go about it?
> 
> You are not allowed to:
> 
> ...


Why, on earth, would any sane person want to get deactivated???

Totally don't get it.


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## gooddolphins (Apr 5, 2018)

I would tie a dead deer on the top of my car and put shades on the deer and I would make sure my next pickup would be someone with a dog.


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## SJCorolla (Jul 12, 2017)

It's been done -- by the U/L driver last year who livestreamed video from inside his car. What he did wasn't illegal and didn't violate any of the above rules (at least not intentionally, afaik). I would just make sure to let U/L know by the 5-day deadline.


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## Uber_Yota_916 (May 1, 2017)

Since I am in CA. A gun rack in the back window. Some rope, bleach, gloves and a shovel in the trunk. Also do not forget the baklava.


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## Another Uber Driver (May 27, 2015)

Only Uber Trolls think that they can earn ten million bananas in a lifetime of driving fo r Uber. They are still hung up on the "life changing money" lie.



reg barclay said:


> deliberately make it dirty.


Passengers will do that for you. Just do not go to the car wash.

I would post dashcam content of my trips on YouTube with all of my identifying information. Both Gr*yft* and F*ub*a*r* de-activate for that, no questions asked.



Seamus said:


> That literally describes every Uber TLC driver in NYC!


They are trying to help a lawyer get rich. The taxi drivers here, do it, as well. You should see them when they are giving their brake pedals a serious workout.


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## 5☆OG (Jun 30, 2019)

reg barclay said:


> Imagine a billionaire offers you $10 million if you can get your account deactivated within 5 days, while adhering to the rules below, how would you go about it?
> 
> You are not allowed to:
> 
> ...


Masterbate ...KACHING !!! LOL


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## UberBastid (Oct 1, 2016)

TemptingFate said:


> Don't shower.


That describes every driver in Seattle.



5☆OG said:


> Masterbate ...KACHING !!! LOL


That describes every driver in San Francisco.



gooddolphins said:


> I would tie a dead deer on the top of my car and put shades on the deer and I would make sure my next pickup would be someone with a dog.


That would be every driver in Florida



Stevie The magic Unicorn said:


> Slurring speech and stumbling around like a drunk


That's every driver in Chicago.


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## BigRedDriver (Nov 28, 2018)

Pick nose

Offer as replacement for mint.


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## UberPete1911 (Aug 10, 2017)

reg barclay said:


> Imagine a billionaire offers you $10 million if you can get your account deactivated within 5 days, while adhering to the rules below, how would you go about it?
> 
> You are not allowed to:
> 
> ...


I would simply join the "yellowbottle" club. So, keep the 9 million and I'll take 1 million in cash.  :roflmao: :biggrin:



Lissetti said:


> *Bring along a pet....*
> 
> View attachment 346538​


Ohh, and my friend is my 5 finger discount suzzy. :thumbup:


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## tohunt4me (Nov 23, 2015)

Wear a M.A.G.A. HAT


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## Dammit Mazzacane (Dec 31, 2015)

Isn't this sort of like Brewster's Millions?

Good mental challenge.
If you want to be deactivated, let me think of a few ideas that meet the parameters you didn't outline.

someone covered the "bring a passenger" angle...

You could refuse to return lost items, but the likelihood of having this situation within five days is a roll of the dice.
You could arrive at rides in the wrong car. That's a violation. "Hey don't insult my Mitsubishi Eclipse it's minty"


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## ThatGuyPaul (Apr 26, 2019)

reg barclay said:


> Imagine a billionaire offers you $10 million if you can get your account deactivated within 5 days, while adhering to the rules below, how would you go about it?
> 
> You are not allowed to:
> 
> ...


Bring someone with me that can do all those things I'm personally not allowed to do.


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## Don'tchasethesurge (Dec 27, 2016)

I would wear super creepy attire and to each ride... " I been expecting you" and creepy comments... see how many rides I can pull off

I would be driving with dark leather gloves on top of everything


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## Galveston (Aug 16, 2019)

reg barclay said:


> Imagine a billionaire offers you $10 million if you can get your account deactivated within 5 days, while adhering to the rules below, how would you go about it?
> 
> You are not allowed to:
> 
> ...


I would stop reporting shady dudes who rate me one star because I refused their advances


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## Lissetti (Dec 20, 2016)

Well I can think of another way now.

I just ate at Taco Bell and I had all the vege options....

Lots of beans in those vege options.......


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## Cdub2k (Nov 22, 2017)

Don't:

Greet or talk to any of your passengers
Make eye contact
Shower or brush your teeth. 
Turn on your AC 



Do: 
Play weird songs like 21 pilots "Heathens" on repeat
Go 10 MPH under whatever the speed limit is
Longhaul everyone

You should get enough complaints and 1 stars on the 1st day to start getting deactivation warnings


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## CJfrom619 (Apr 27, 2017)

25rides7daysaweek said:


> Ide pull out my tallywhacker
> and whack it silently
> If that didnt work
> ide use my pee cup
> ...


Lol jesus. Give your bits and pieces a break lol holy shit


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## ZenUber (Feb 11, 2019)

Give my wife a ride, and have her report me for being drunk and attacking her.


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## Ajayrocks (Aug 2, 2019)

Ask the Pax where they thought they were going and start driving the wrong direction for a mile or so and keep repeating I know a shortcut


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## dirtylee (Sep 2, 2015)

Cancel rides nonstop.


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## rman954 (May 31, 2016)

Wear a Trump 2020 hat.


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## freddieman (Oct 24, 2016)

I’d just drive with my zipper open.


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## Timbrr (Mar 1, 2019)

I would flat out refuse to speak. No responses or acknowledgements to anything at all. Somehow I think this would work.


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## RaleighUber (Dec 4, 2016)

Trafficat said:


> More good tactics:
> - Have your friend ride with you in the passenger seat.
> - If you are lucky enough for the selfie challenge, make your friend take the selfie!


Pax once told me they got picked up by a couple in their 70's...she drove, he rode up front to "navigate." Not sure how they would handle a group of 4 pax...


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## Another Uber Driver (May 27, 2015)

Lissetti said:


> I just ate at Taco Bell and I had all the vege options....Lots of beans in those vege options.......


Original Poster was asking how to get de-activated in five days, not how to get a Summons-to-Court for Creating a Public Nuisance in five minutes.


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## tohunt4me (Nov 23, 2015)

Lissetti said:


> Well I can think of another way now.
> 
> I just ate at Taco Bell and I had all the vege options....
> 
> ...


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## CJfrom619 (Apr 27, 2017)

Timbrr said:


> I would flat out refuse to speak. No responses or acknowledgements to anything at all. Somehow I think this would work.


It doesn't I've tried


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## New2This (Dec 27, 2015)

Lissetti said:


> Well I can think of another way now.
> 
> I just ate at Taco Bell and I had all the vege options....
> 
> ...


That doesn't work. Ask me how I know


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## Merc7186 (Jul 8, 2017)

Does this count @reg barclay ???

https://uberpeople.net/threads/here-comes-uber-of-fun.294955/


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## EphLux (Aug 10, 2018)

At every pickup, I'd come out of the car to greet passenger with one of these in my hand while staggering lol



MiamiKid said:


> Why, on earth, would any sane person want to get deactivated???
> 
> Totally don't get it.


lol Maybe because 45 pennies a mile


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## MiamiKid (May 24, 2016)

EphLux said:


> At every pickup, I'd come out of the car to greet passenger with one of these in my hand while staggering lol
> 
> 
> lol Maybe because 45 pennies a mile


Solution: Quit
Problem solved 
?


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## Dammit Mazzacane (Dec 31, 2015)

What if you told people you need to make stops along the way. "Oh hey before we go to the airport I need to pick up some stuff at Walmart, K?"


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## Z129 (May 30, 2018)

reg barclay said:


> Imagine a billionaire offers you $10 million if you can get your account deactivated within 5 days, while adhering to the rules below, how would you go about it?
> 
> You are not allowed to:
> 
> ...


Not even a problem. A few dozen inappropriate laughs, sighs, and snorts and a couple of Whatevers thrown in for good measure and I am deactivated for low ratings.


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## Coastal_Cruiser (Oct 1, 2018)

Does the deal include the billionaire taking my wife away for the weekend, aka Indecent Proposal? If so I'm in.

-----


VanGuy said:


> Best Rainman impersonation.


"I'm an excellent driver."


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## Chorch (May 17, 2019)

Stevie The magic Unicorn said:


> Slurring speech and stumbling around like a drunk


I would get drunk for real. Why take the risk?


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## EphLux (Aug 10, 2018)

MiamiKid said:


> Solution: Quit
> Problem solved
> ?


It's at $0.60 a mile now.

Training for a new job that comes with full benefits and pension is next month. Hopefully I will be fully disentangled from Uber before they drop it to $0.45 a mile in Los Angeles.



Chorch said:


> I would get drunk for real. Why take the risk?


The rules said you cant do anything illegal if you want to collect your $10M


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## Chorch (May 17, 2019)

EphLux said:


> The rules said you cant do anything illegal if you want to collect your $10M


Oh... too late (?)


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## MondayMan (Apr 27, 2019)

Ask every pax if they would like some water. When they say yes, shoot them in the face with a squirt gun.


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## MondayMan (Apr 27, 2019)

Idea #2: When passengers ask if you like doing Uber say, "It's so great! I can't believe they let me do it! I thought there was no way I'd pass the background check." Then ask if they know a good defense lawyer.

Idea #3: Repeat back to the passengers every word they say, like a toddler.


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## MSBash (Mar 17, 2019)

Get some friends to ride with you and enjoy a cigarette or 2 during the trip.


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## MondayMan (Apr 27, 2019)

Idea #4: bring your cat


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## ariel5466 (May 16, 2019)

Longhaul to the extreme. Oh, you're going from Shockoe Bottom to Scott's Addition? Cool, we'll swing by Short Pump


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## TXUbering (May 9, 2018)

reg barclay said:


> Imagine a billionaire offers you $10 million if you can get your account deactivated within 5 days, while adhering to the rules below, how would you go about it?
> 
> You are not allowed to:
> 
> ...


You just described my last ride..... Were you my last pax?!?!?!?!


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## MondayMan (Apr 27, 2019)

Idea #5: search people’s bags before you put them in your trunk


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## Signal Twenty (Jun 26, 2017)

Wear my MAGA shirt and hat!!! 

Put the radio on conservative talk radio.


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## Tom Oldman (Feb 2, 2019)

reg barclay said:


> Imagine a billionaire offers you $10 million if you can get your account deactivated within 5 days, while adhering to the rules below, how would you go about it?
> 
> You are not allowed to:
> 
> ...


Someone has a lot of time and doesn't know what to do or what to say, wishful thinking at new "highs" I want some too.
Billionaire???, 10 million???? Really??? ????


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## reg barclay (Nov 3, 2015)

Signal Twenty said:


> Wear my MAGA shirt and hat!!!
> 
> Put the radio on conservative talk radio.


Wear my MAGBA hat.


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## MiamiKid (May 24, 2016)

freddieman said:


> I'd just drive with my zipper open with my penis sticking out


?


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## Galveston (Aug 16, 2019)

Uber_Yota_916 said:


> Use Twitter to blast both companies until they deactivated my accounts.


Ummmm


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## Slim Pete (Nov 21, 2014)

reg barclay said:


> Imagine a billionaire offers you $10 million if you can get your account deactivated within 5 days, while adhering to the rules below, how would you go about it?
> 
> You are not allowed to:
> 
> ...


Eat burritos, put the child lock on (so they can't roll the windows down) - AND then fart to your heart's content - loud & long!


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## Dammit Mazzacane (Dec 31, 2015)

Z129 said:


> Not even a problem. A few dozen inappropriate laughs, sighs, and snorts and a couple of Whatevers thrown in for good measure and I am deactivated for low ratings.


You can't insult the pax.



dirtylee said:


> Cancel rides nonstop.


We have a surefire winner here, right? Would they deactivate?

Other option is GPS spoofing / ghosting


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## MiamiKid (May 24, 2016)

Signal Twenty said:


> Wear my MAGA shirt and hat!!!
> 
> Put the radio on conservative talk radio.


Doing that now and receiving tips and decent star ratings.

However, for some reason, some folks seem to get really offended? Can't please everyone. ?

MAGA
??


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## JBinPenfield (Sep 14, 2017)

reg barclay said:


> Imagine a billionaire offers you $10 million if you can get your account deactivated within 5 days, while adhering to the rules below, how would you go about it?
> 
> You are not allowed to:
> 
> ...


Offer my next 10 pax $100 apiece to accuse me of the stuff on your list.


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## Lythium (Jun 28, 2017)

reg barclay said:


> Imagine a billionaire offers you $10 million if you can get your account deactivated within 5 days, while adhering to the rules below, how would you go about it?
> 
> You are not allowed to:
> 
> ...


Making idle conversation when taking pax home:
So I noticed we're going to ______, how do you like that area?

Is it pretty safe?

You look so familiar...

I love dogs, do you have any dogs?

Do you see a lot of police around this area?

I've got it! You look like (for women) my ex wife (for men) my ex wife's new husband. It's a good thing you're not though, if I ever saw them again I would...(act like I'm thinking, and start mumbling incoherently).

So if you needed to call the cops, how long do you think it would take them to respond?

Do you lock your doors? ALL of them?

What about the gate to your fence?

As we pulled up I would put my phone out the window, snap a few pictures of the house, then say "Thank you, have a great night". Then with a far away look, and in a low voice: "See you later..."

Sit in the driveway for about 10 minutes before pulling out slowly, take another picture of the house, then slowly drive off.



Trafficat said:


> I'd make sure to drive to the most leftist area I am allowed to operate in while legally open carrying a large firearm. I'd pickup a habit of smoking cigarettes and drive while smoking. I would drive wearing nothing other than a diaper, a pair of cowboy boots, sunglasses, a ski mask, and my large bandoleer holster for my large handgun. I would be sure not to bathe. In some areas you might not be able to open carry or drive while masked, but at a minimum you can refuse to shave or comb your hair. I'd keep the windows rolled down on the highway. I'd play really annoying music and refuse to turn it off, or to adjust the volume up or down. I'd not use the air conditioning during the summer and not use the heater during the winter. I'd insist every passenger has his seat belt on before we drive, and refuse children who do not have child seats. I would never adjust any seat nor provide any assistance in the adjustment of any seat. I would never help with luggage. I would make sure to pick up every person who angrily yells at me on the phone for being late to pick them up. When people put in the wrong pickup location on the app, I'd drive halfway across town to pick them up instead of collecting the cancel fees, except when the wrong pickup location is across the street, in which case I'd tell the passenger they have to walk over to me and get in because I can only pick up from the location in the app. I'd forbid my passengers from having open containers and from vaping in the car. I'd request that any departure from the path on the app is changed on their end.
> 
> If they were waiting on a red curb I'd call them and tell them to walk over to me at the nearest legal pickup point. I'd refuse to drop passengers off on red curbs. I'd refuse to do illegal U-turns. I would not exceed the speed limit by even 1 mph, even if they were in a hurry. I'd answer all questions with one word responses and never smile. I'd drive until I hit the 16 hour limit each day.
> 
> Most likely you would be deactivated quickly for violating the weapons policy, but if not, you could certainly be deactivated for low rating with these tactics pretty quickly.


I don't think most of that would get you deactivated, it sounds pretty much like business as usual for some of the drivers I know...


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## uberdonkey99 (Jun 12, 2018)

Drive in the Bronx.

It's only a matter of time before someone makes a fake DUI accusation against you to get a free ride.

Happened to me any many others.


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## UberLaLa (Sep 6, 2015)

CANCEL, CANCEL, then CANCEL some more...


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## losiglow (Dec 4, 2018)

Take pax to the wrong airport.


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## Dice Man (May 21, 2018)

Play C R A Z Y.



losiglow said:


> Take pax to the wrong airport.


Or strip club instead!


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## losiglow (Dec 4, 2018)

Or get a super ghetto car, instead of the one you normally drive. Stains on the seats, lots of body damage, cracked or broken windows. Then throw a fish under the seat for good measure.


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## TwoFiddyMile (Mar 13, 2015)

"oops I made a wrong turn OOPS I made another WRONG TURN I made another WRONG turn oops I made another wrong turn what do you mean you want to end the riDE here and walk the rest of the way?"


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## kingcorey321 (May 20, 2018)

i would put the heat on full blast in the 100 degree day . or in the winter have the windows down when im wearing a snowsuit .
put on some skunk spray it will smell nice . i have two subwoofers it will be played full blast at all times . when i pull up to them it will be shaking there house . i would dress like a clown talking like a clown honking my nose many times . constantly preach for a satanic evil book . have pentagrams on the back seats . i would not get into the car if i seen them ! ow hell no . corn starch all over my face looks like drugs . wearing a painters mask that has those big filters transporting 2 gas cylinders that are on the front seat it would be actual oxygen bottles but they would not know . it would scare them . have a push button starter attached to my jacket with a bunch of wires showing preying . one of these starters https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0009XQUKW/?tag=ubne0c-20
i think the push button switch would scare anybody and preying . i would not get into that car ! ow hell no its a bomber
the switch is connected to a heated sweater under the jacket to turn it on and off


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## UbersFinest (Mar 4, 2019)

Drive my car off the bridge.


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## eazycc (Apr 5, 2019)

Pretend not to speak English. 
Miss a couple of turns here and there
drop off at wrong destination
Pretend I'm lost and don't know what I'm doing.


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## ntcindetroit (Mar 23, 2017)

reg barclay said:


> Imagine a billionaire offers you $10 million if you can get your account deactivated within 5 days, while adhering to the rules below, how would you go about it?
> 
> You are not allowed to:
> 
> ...


Rent my Uber qualified/Lyft inspected car to do rideshare in Detroit for 5 days
Pick up pax w/ short destinations from airport that have been cancelled by other drivers.
Go to Arrival or Departure instead of Ground Transportation/Commercial/Ridesharing garage to pick up per pax's texting.
Refuse to answer pax how big is your trunk when they have got 4 ppl and 8 pieces of luggage.
Refuse to let the only guy that smoke to do it in your car

I guarantee you'll get a call from Filipino girls without doubt.
Don't answer calls originated from foreigners.


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## DoubleDee (Apr 22, 2019)

reg barclay said:


> 1. Insult pax, their family or friends.
> 2. Say anything racist or sexist.
> 3. Break any traffic laws or do anything illegal.
> 4. Make sexual advances toward pax.
> ...


I've been doing all of the above since day one driving Uber. Especially the sexual advances thing. And I've never been deactivated. I see nothing wrong with these types of behaviors.

Just the other day a pax called me as I was waiting in front of their house for them to come out. I answered the phone "Where the [email protected]@@ are you [email protected]@@h ?"


----------



## Coachman (Sep 22, 2015)

Just file a couple phony toll claims and you'll be deactivated for fraudulent activity in a heartbeat.


----------



## Diamondraider (Mar 13, 2017)

reg barclay said:


> Imagine a billionaire offers you $10 million if you can get your account deactivated within 5 days, while adhering to the rules below, how would you go about it?
> 
> You are not allowed to:
> 
> ...


Tell each pax your cell service is restricted until you pay the bill. Politely ask them to provide real time navigation or lend you their phone.



DoubleDee said:


> I've been doing all of the above since day one driving Uber. Especially the sexual advances thing. And I've never been deactivated. I see nothing wrong with these types of behaviors.
> 
> Just the other day a pax called me as I was waiting in front of their house for them to come out. I answered the phone "Where the [email protected]@@ are you [email protected]@@h ?"


That's why you were asked for fresh material. You are getting stale.



25rides7daysaweek said:


> Ide pull out my tallywhacker
> and whack it silently
> If that didnt work
> ide use my pee cup
> ...


Leave chilled, pee filled country time lemonade bottles in the cup holders.



25rides7daysaweek said:


> Ide pull out my tallywhacker
> and whack it silently
> If that didnt work
> ide use my pee cup
> ...


Leave chilled, pee filled country time lemonade bottles in the cup holders.


Trafficat said:


> I'd make sure to drive to the most leftist area I am allowed to operate in while legally open carrying a large firearm. I'd pickup a habit of smoking cigarettes and drive while smoking. I would drive wearing nothing other than a diaper, a pair of cowboy boots, sunglasses, a ski mask, and my large bandoleer holster for my large handgun. I would be sure not to bathe. In some areas you might not be able to open carry or drive while masked, but at a minimum you can refuse to shave or comb your hair. I'd keep the windows rolled down on the highway. I'd play really annoying music and refuse to turn it off, or to adjust the volume up or down. I'd not use the air conditioning during the summer and not use the heater during the winter. I'd insist every passenger has his seat belt on before we drive, and refuse children who do not have child seats. I would never adjust any seat nor provide any assistance in the adjustment of any seat. I would never help with luggage. I would make sure to pick up every person who angrily yells at me on the phone for being late to pick them up. When people put in the wrong pickup location on the app, I'd drive halfway across town to pick them up instead of collecting the cancel fees, except when the wrong pickup location is across the street, in which case I'd tell the passenger they have to walk over to me and get in because I can only pick up from the location in the app. I'd forbid my passengers from having open containers and from vaping in the car. I'd request that any departure from the path on the app is changed on their end.
> 
> If they were waiting on a red curb I'd call them and tell them to walk over to me at the nearest legal pickup point. I'd refuse to drop passengers off on red curbs. I'd refuse to do illegal U-turns. I would not exceed the speed limit by even 1 mph, even if they were in a hurry. I'd answer all questions with one word responses and never smile. I'd drive until I hit the 16 hour limit each day.
> 
> Most likely you would be deactivated quickly for violating the weapons policy, but if not, you could certainly be deactivated for low rating with these tactics pretty quickly.


A leftist waiting on a red curb is already a captured pawn. Offer to help the leftist escape the clutches of the Red Curb State. Give them walking directions to the Blue Bikes and then tell them, "**** off"

Most effective on 90+ degree, high humidity days around lunchtime


----------



## reg barclay (Nov 3, 2015)

DoubleDee said:


> I've been doing all of the above since day one driving Uber. Especially the sexual advances thing. And I've never been deactivated. I see nothing wrong with these types of behaviors.
> 
> Just the other day a pax called me as I was waiting in front of their house for them to come out. I answered the phone "Where the [email protected]@@ are you [email protected]@@h ?"


I don't believe you. No associate of our mentor Duck Drake would ever display such negativity to the community.


----------



## oleole20 (Apr 8, 2019)

Show up naked


----------



## KK2929 (Feb 9, 2017)

I would go to a Driver Support center dressed in a bikini and march throughout the room with a sign demanding that U/L reduce their cut to 20% of my fares.



Lythium said:


> Making idle conversation when taking pax home:
> So I noticed we're going to ______, how do you like that area?
> 
> Is it pretty safe?
> ...


---------------------------
I got nervous just reading your post !!!!


----------



## DoubleDee (Apr 22, 2019)

reg barclay said:


> I don't believe you. No associate of our mentor Duck Drake would ever display such negativity to the community.


Lol. Please don't compare me to my mentor the great Duck Drake. I can never live up to his legacy as one of the great Uber and Lyft drivers of all time.


----------



## everydayimubering (Aug 5, 2017)

Cancel rides after accepting them giving one pretext or another.
Deliberately arrive late for pickups.
Start rides, then cancel for all the wrong reasons.
Cancel rides mid-trip for any lame excuse (sorry - ran outta gas, have to do a personal errand, gotta visit a friend in hospital, sorry - I feel drowsy/I feel hungover, etc.).
Pretend you're tipsy.
[Guaranteed: You'll win the $5 million offered within 24 hours]

Edit: Also complain to every rider how evil Uber is and how badly they treat their driver-partners.


----------



## ntcindetroit (Mar 23, 2017)

Buy a cheap phone I have tested for rideshre and use the same carrier that just quit right after my account was deactivated, 
You're more likely than not to be the winner of $10 millions pot.


----------



## Austin383 (Mar 11, 2019)

I have an idea. This might sound stupid but why not just stop driving for them. Some people on hear sound like a bunch of cry baby’s. I feel like there are several people on here who would spit in the food before serving it because they don’t like their boss. Grow the f**k up


----------



## HonoluluHoku (Jul 2, 2019)

Austin383 said:


> I have an idea. This might sound stupid but why not just stop driving for them. Some people on hear sound like a bunch of cry baby's. I feel like there are several people on here who would spit in the food before serving it because they don't like their boss. Grow the f**k up


I thought it was all in fun. I like the job, and so far have no complaints. My market is a pretty easy and perhaps more lucrative one, though.


----------



## UberPyro (Dec 19, 2016)

Diamondraider said:


> Tell each pax your cell service is restricted until you pay the bill. Politely ask them to provide real time navigation or lend you their phone.
> 
> 
> That's why you were asked for fresh material. You are getting stale.
> ...


I've had a pax drink from my pee bottle. She was super drunk and I doubt she really noticed but she took a big gulp from my mt dew bottle ?


----------



## rkozy (Apr 5, 2019)

Print up a huge stack of copies of the image from your most recent colonoscopy. During the ride, only talk about your most recent colonoscopy. If the pax tries to change the topic, always circle back to the colonoscopy.  As they are exiting the vehicle, hand them a copy of the image from your most recent colonoscopy, explaining its a souvenir from your ride with the most awesome Uber driver ever.


----------



## Asmedious (Jul 25, 2019)

Eat the gassiest, garliciest food an hour before going online. Then make sure the kid safety option is on so the windows can't be rolled down. Apologize for a lot about windows and vents not working "cause they just broke this morning." Make a few wrong turns and get stuck in traffic as much as possible. Maybe laugh at my own farts while apologizing for them at the same time.


----------



## Whoomp there it is (Sep 27, 2015)

Install mirror above passengers head in back seat (so you can see the road in front of car) Turn around stare at passenger, drive fast don't talk.


----------



## nozm212 (Jul 22, 2018)

reg barclay said:


> Imagine a billionaire offers you $10 million if you can get your account deactivated within 5 days, while adhering to the rules below, how would you go about it?
> 
> You are not allowed to:
> 
> ...


You have better chances of making $10 million on your own.


----------



## Jumpin Jim (Mar 4, 2018)

Cue background music..."I'm too sexy for my shirt...Too sexy for my shirt...so sexy it hurts..."


----------



## Disgusted Driver (Jan 9, 2015)

Given that I already have one recent temporary deactivation for driving under the influence, a second one two weeks later should do it, right? Place a sealed bottle of Jack Daniels on the dash (legal in passenger compartment because it's sealed) pick people up, swerve a little and slur slightly. That should get me a second complaint in 3 weeks, bonus if they take a picture of the bottle and send that to Uber!


----------



## Lythium (Jun 28, 2017)

HonoluluHoku said:


> I thought it was all in fun. I like the job, and so far have no complaints. My market is a pretty easy and perhaps more lucrative one, though.


I agree! Yes, there are some cry babies on this site (and by some I mean quite a few), but not all of us hate the job, and the post itself was fun.



rkozy said:


> Print up a huge stack of copies of the image from your most recent colonoscopy. During the ride, only talk about your most recent colonoscopy. If the pax tries to change the topic, always circle back to the colonoscopy. As they are exiting the vehicle, hand them a copy of the image from your most recent colonoscopy, explaining its a souvenir from your ride with the most awesome Uber driver ever.


I have a van with a TV screen in it, I wonder if I could loop a video...


----------



## Kodyhead (May 26, 2015)

Insist you cannot start the trip unless we hold hands, pray and read a chapter from L Ron Hubbard's dianetics book


----------



## everydayimubering (Aug 5, 2017)

Austin383 said:


> I have an idea. This might sound stupid but why not just stop driving for them. Some people on hear sound like a bunch of cry baby's. I feel like there are several people on here who would spit in the food before serving it because they don't like their boss. Grow the f**k up


It's only about winning the $10 million - didn't ya read?


----------



## Roadmasta (Aug 4, 2017)

I have just developed Tourette syndrome. I gave up showering and tollet paper for five days also took up jogging. The ac just broke and windows won't go down.


----------



## dimwit_driver (Jan 26, 2017)

Drive naked.


----------



## Kodyhead (May 26, 2015)

Another Uber Driver said:


> Original Poster was asking how to get de-activated in five days, not how to get a Summons-to-Court for Creating a Public Nuisance in five minutes.


Eh, Tom-a-toe, sub-pea-nah


----------



## Flier5425 (Jun 2, 2016)

Have your vehicle inspected with multiple items wrong: worn out tires, broken seat belts, head lights & tail lights out, cracked windshield, non functioning locks, doors that don't open from the outside, etc.


----------



## Bigsk8r (Jun 16, 2017)

A guy in Austin - in response to Lyft's new rates - has begun accepting rides from his desk at his day job and not going to pick them up. Within the first few hours he was given a 60 minute suspension. I think he'll be deactivated well before the 5th day.

He is my new hero.


----------



## rkozy (Apr 5, 2019)

Lythium said:


> I have a van with a TV screen in it, I wonder if I could loop a video...


Even better. But, if you're going to have video of the colonoscopy looping, be sure to add periodic fart sounds as you narrate the procedure.


----------



## Teri12 (Jul 20, 2016)

reg barclay said:


> Imagine a billionaire offers you $10 million if you can get your account deactivated within 5 days, while adhering to the rules below, how would you go about it?
> 
> You are not allowed to:
> 
> ...


From my experience, pick up young women riders (in their 20's), be sure to wait for them on the other side of the street, ask them nicely to stop their children putting feet on the seats, go round a roundabout (with your indicators going) and pray some idiot assumes you're going straight ahead, call them during a 'stop' they forgot to mention to you as they got out the car, after waiting for them 5 minutes. Or, just pick up any drunk mid-20's female and she'll invent your indiscretions.... not matter what gender you identify by lol.



Teri12 said:


> From my experience, pick up young women riders (in their 20's), be sure to wait for them on the other side of the street, ask them nicely to stop their children putting feet on the seats, go round a roundabout (with your indicators going) and pray some idiot assumes you're going straight ahead, call them during a 'stop' they forgot to mention to you as they got out the car, after waiting for them 5 minutes. Or, just pick up any drunk mid-20's female and she'll invent your indiscretions.... no matter what gender you identify as lol.


----------



## Eugene73 (Jun 29, 2017)

reg barclay said:


> Imagine a billionaire offers you $10 million if you can get your account deactivated within 5 days, while adhering to the rules below, how would you go about it?
> 
> You are not allowed to:
> 
> ...


Follow the speed limit, come to complete stops, and engage in polite conversation with the pax. Guaranteed 1stars and fake complaints all day long.


----------



## Wildgoose (Feb 11, 2019)

Just carry a permitted gun without any ammo in it, placed it to be seen easily by pax.


----------



## SFOspeedracer (Jun 25, 2019)

rkozy said:


> Print up a huge stack of copies of the image from your most recent colonoscopy. During the ride, only talk about your most recent colonoscopy. If the pax tries to change the topic, always circle back to the colonoscopy. As they are exiting the vehicle, hand them a copy of the image from your most recent colonoscopy, explaining its a souvenir from your ride with the most awesome Uber driver ever.


I laughed so ****ing hard at this ..

Best one by far


----------



## ROY_Doncic (Jul 30, 2019)

reg barclay said:


> Imagine a billionaire offers you $10 million if you can get your account deactivated within 5 days, while adhering to the rules below, how would you go about it?
> 
> You are not allowed to:
> 
> ...


#1 - I'd refuse to turn on the AC or Heat in my vehicle
#2 - I'd perpetually miss turns, and when the PAX asked me about it, I would just say "Don't worry. I know a better way." Then, I'd miss another turn.
#3 - I'd make phone calls during trips. I'd send text messages and/or check my social media accounts while at every red light.
#4 - I'd talk about all of the hacks I can do within the Uber app. Like miss turn & say "Oh sorry, I've been up for 20 hours already. I started my day doing 12 hours of driving for Lyft, but they make you stop driving after 12 hours, so I just turned on my Uber app & started driving for them the last 8 hours" Then I'd yawn and tell them I think they're going to be my last trip.
#5 - PAX who I could tell didn't want to talk, I would insist on starting a conversation with them. PAX who did want to talk, I would constantly interrupt them & change the subject
#6 - I would accept delivery requests from McDonald's between 3am and 5am. A lot of times the McDonald's are closed. Then I'd call support. They issue you a $3 payment under the promotion fee. Every time I've gotten one Uber has sent a semi-threatening message saying "It's cool for now, but too many promotion fee payments & I'll be under review for fraudulent behavior"
#7 - I would print up business cards, like say I was offering piano lessons, and I would keep bugging the PAX to hire me & just not take No for an answer.
#8 - I would keep my gas tank near empty, and tell PAX that I need to stop for gas before I can finish their trip.
#9 - I would never take any toll roads. I would stay on the service road & try to hit every red light possible.
#10 - What ever the PAX did, look out the window, text on their phone, dig in their purse, I would ask them not to do it & claim it was distracting to me. I would start by wherever they sat in my vehicle, asking them to change to another seat.
#11 - I would talk about all of the things PAX do that annoy me. I would finish every topic by saying "and they didn't even leave me a tip!!"
#12 - I would talk about health problems I've been having and openly question how much longer I thought I could keep driving full time.
#13 - I would play loud music and try to pick a genre of music I thought the PAX would hate.
#14 - I'd ask the PAX if they were hungry, and ask them if they minded if I stopped at a drive thru for some fast food.
#15 - I would get upset at other drivers on the road and talk about what terrible drivers they are. I would honk at drivers at red lights who didn't immediately go when the light turned green. I would change lanes constantly when it's not necessary and complain about drivers cutting me off, even when they didn't.


----------



## Cubs44 (Jul 12, 2019)

have "weed" scented deodorizers.


----------



## SinCityAngel (Jul 7, 2019)

Trafficat said:


> More good tactics:
> - Have your friend ride with you in the passenger seat.
> - If you are lucky enough for the selfie challenge, make your friend take the selfie!


I was going to say all you have to do is either mess up the selfie challenge by letting somebody else take the challenge
OR
Try picking people up in a different car. While it is not illegal and you will be treating passengers like you would always treat them, I'm sure there's going to be one person that freaks out and report you because they felt some type of way


----------



## TwoFiddyMile (Mar 13, 2015)

Eugene73 said:


> Follow the speed limit, come to complete stops, and engage in polite conversation with the pax. Guaranteed 1stars and fake complaints all day long.


Sad but true.


----------



## Kodyhead (May 26, 2015)

Wildgoose said:


> Just carry a permitted gun without any ammo in it, placed it to be seen easily by pax.


Guns are not allowed in rideshare vehicles, but it doesn't specify bullets so must leave a bunch of loose bullets on the floor


----------



## AngelAdams (Jan 21, 2019)

reg barclay said:


> Imagine a billionaire offers you $10 million if you can get your account deactivated within 5 days, while adhering to the rules below, how would you go about it?
> 
> You are not allowed to:
> 
> ...


Accept and cancel 10 trips.



Trafficat said:


> I'd make sure to drive to the most leftist area I am allowed to operate in while legally open carrying a large firearm. I'd pickup a habit of smoking cigarettes and drive while smoking. I would drive wearing nothing other than a diaper, a pair of cowboy boots, sunglasses, a ski mask, and my large bandoleer holster for my large handgun. I would be sure not to bathe. In some areas you might not be able to open carry or drive while masked, but at a minimum you can refuse to shave or comb your hair. I'd keep the windows rolled down on the highway. I'd play really annoying music and refuse to turn it off, or to adjust the volume up or down. I'd not use the air conditioning during the summer and not use the heater during the winter. I'd insist every passenger has his seat belt on before we drive, and refuse children who do not have child seats. I would never adjust any seat nor provide any assistance in the adjustment of any seat. I would never help with luggage. I would make sure to pick up every person who angrily yells at me on the phone for being late to pick them up. When people put in the wrong pickup location on the app, I'd drive halfway across town to pick them up instead of collecting the cancel fees, except when the wrong pickup location is across the street, in which case I'd tell the passenger they have to walk over to me and get in because I can only pick up from the location in the app. I'd forbid my passengers from having open containers and from vaping in the car. I'd request that any departure from the path on the app is changed on their end.
> 
> If they were waiting on a red curb I'd call them and tell them to walk over to me at the nearest legal pickup point. I'd refuse to drop passengers off on red curbs. I'd refuse to do illegal U-turns. I would not exceed the speed limit by even 1 mph, even if they were in a hurry. I'd answer all questions with one word responses and never smile. I'd drive until I hit the 16 hour limit each day.
> 
> Most likely you would be deactivated quickly for violating the weapons policy, but if not, you could certainly be deactivated for low rating with these tactics pretty quickly.


Or you can take your emotional support horse with you when you drive.



Uber_Yota_916 said:


> Use Twitter to blast both companies until they deactivated my accounts.


Those accounts aren't monitored by real people. It's AI. It refused to say I'm not a bot lol.


----------



## TXUbering (May 9, 2018)

Put a large pickle jar in the back seat with 1-2 lone pickles (mostly visible jar works best) and when the rider goes to get in, reach for the pickle jar and say, "My apologies, sometimes I can't find a public restroom soon enough".


----------



## ROY_Doncic (Jul 30, 2019)

Every PAX you pick up, turn off the engine, get out & beg to use their bathroom saying “Please, it’s an EMERGENCY!!”


----------



## Ahmado (Jan 8, 2019)

Pass out at traffic light
You Will get deactivated for 24-48 hours


----------



## ntcindetroit (Mar 23, 2017)

Ahmado said:


> Pass out at traffic light
> You Will get deactivated for 24-48 hours


With an ER doctor as rider? Or no riders at all? 
Is their algo that smart?


----------



## ntcindetroit (Mar 23, 2017)

SinCityAngel said:


> I was going to say all you have to do is either mess up the selfie challenge by letting somebody else take the challenge
> OR
> Try picking people up in a different car. While it is not illegal and you will be treating passengers like you would always treat them, I'm sure there's going to be one person that freaks out and report you because they felt some type of way


I have experiences with both, kind of.

First, their selfie is not universally compatible with all the phones out there, at least in my cases. The selfie just won't work with my phone's camera control software. Every time they request a selfie while I was out of my office, I have to stop what I was doing and drive home office to borrow another phone to do the selfie check. The worst part is they were asking selfie everyday for like 7 days in a row until it was unbearable as it disrupted my work and add unnecessary cost and down time and lower the morale. A very bad product or service or implement for no benefit in return.

2nd, you can't trust the Uber employee as they tampered or modified my description of my uber vehicle. I got a lot negative complaints reported as I've used different vehicles to pick up riders. It takes two or three tries before the Uber employee(s) will take my input to fix the intentional or unintentional erroneous description they have created.


----------



## Asificarewhatyoudontthink (Jul 6, 2017)

reg barclay said:


> Imagine a billionaire offers you $10 million if you can get your account deactivated within 5 days, while adhering to the rules below, how would you go about it?
> 
> You are not allowed to:
> 
> ...


Tell every rider I am going to 1 star them.
No reason given.

Also, hard braking is not illegal or a traffic law...so, meet the back of the head rest friends.

But, best solution.
Show up to every ride in blood soaked shirt (prop blood of course) with death metal music blasting...
When the rider gets in the car just start the ride and stare at them in the mirror. No movement. Nothing...
Works best if you make sure all the locks go down right when you make eye contact.

Now I have to go look for that scene in Highlander


----------



## TwoFiddyMile (Mar 13, 2015)

Asificarewhatyoudontthink said:


> Tell every rider I am going to 1 star them.
> No reason given.
> 
> Also, hard braking is not illegal or a traffic law...so, meet the back of the head rest friends.
> ...


There can only be one.


----------



## Asificarewhatyoudontthink (Jul 6, 2017)

Asificarewhatyoudontthink said:


> Tell every rider I am going to 1 star them.
> No reason given.
> 
> Also, hard braking is not illegal or a traffic law...so, meet the back of the head rest friends.
> ...


oh oh oh .... and

Turn
Off
The
I
Am
A 
Normal
Human
Filter....

so many good ideas for horror movies...so little time to destroy peoples restful nights sleep...did i ever tell you the one about the cannibal baby hotdog vendor or the time I dreamed about chasing uber passengers around inside the car while the vehicle was on cruise control (yeah, that one was weird cause we kept changing sizes so we could really make the most out of that space....ignore the shovel rope ductape and bottle of chemicals marked Knock-Out-Quick...


----------



## Disgusted Driver (Jan 9, 2015)

Bigsk8r said:


> A guy in Austin - in response to Lyft's new rates - has begun accepting rides from his desk at his day job and not going to pick them up. Within the first few hours he was given a 60 minute suspension. I think he'll be deactivated well before the 5th day.
> 
> He is my new hero.


What's really interesting though is that I've had my app on and let at least 200 pings time out in the last 10 days and not a peep. I've even started claiming scheduled rides and then not logging in to claim them. I am doing what I can to disrupt my community, won't you all join me?


----------



## Wolfgang Faust (Aug 2, 2018)

Stevie The magic Unicorn said:


> Slurring speech and stumbling around like a drunk


I not as think you drunk I am!


----------



## Asificarewhatyoudontthink (Jul 6, 2017)

OHOHOHOH, have I mentioned I love this idea...

So, there is this thing where you can go to a slaughter house (abattoir for the fancy) and buy cheap off cuts that they don't use...and blood. 
Um, don't ask how or why I know and ignore the pentagrams...
Anyway, get a burlap sack, several actually...
And get some hog heads...these aren't as cheap as some of the other parts...
You want some sections of skin and the parts of the legs they don't really do much with between the ankles and the knees...
Dress this out in the bag so the parts of legs look like arms and legs of people...best you can...fake hands and feet work if they are decent prop quality.

I drive a wagon type car so, yeah, those go in the back with the shovel, rope etc from my above suggestion



MiamiKid said:


> Why, on earth, would any sane person want to get deactivated???
> 
> Totally don't get it.


For the...

Say it with Us.

10Million US Dollars.

Did you not even bother reading...??? Really.



RaleighUber said:


> Pax once told me they got picked up by a couple in their 70's...she drove, he rode up front to "navigate." Not sure how they would handle a group of 4 pax...


Uber XL vehicle but with the option for Uber X only .


----------



## Asificarewhatyoudontthink (Jul 6, 2017)

TwoFiddyMile said:


> There can only be one.


That is not in the rules.

I can do as many things as I can (well my sick twisted inner monologue) think of.
As long as it doesn't break any of the established rules...


----------



## Ubeard (Aug 20, 2019)

Would flatulence get you fired? How about if you blame the pax? I mean look 'em dead in the eye, rip one and then ask _"Did you just...?"_


----------



## MiamiKid (May 24, 2016)

Ubeard said:


> Would flatulence get you fired? How about if you blame the pax? I mean look 'em dead in the eye, rip one and then ask _"Did you just...?"_


Cool it 
?


----------



## Agent Cam (Aug 2, 2019)

Go to the airport and turn on and off your gps. I received one of those deactivation threats for this and wasn’t even doing so. They accused me of gps manipulation to try and get rides. Wtf


----------



## Clothahump (Mar 31, 2018)

reg barclay said:


> Imagine a billionaire offers you $10 million if you can get your account deactivated within 5 days, while adhering to the rules below, how would you go about it?
> 
> You are not allowed to:
> 
> ...


Strap on a firearm and climb into the car, letting my camera record it. Loudly announce that I am ready to go drive for Uber. Then post that video, plus a video of my next ride showing the rider's face.


----------



## PlayLoud (Jan 11, 2019)

reg barclay said:


> Imagine a billionaire offers you $10 million if you can get your account deactivated within 5 days, while adhering to the rules below, how would you go about it?
> 
> You are not allowed to:
> 
> ...


Hmm...
Drive the pax to the wrong location. Like... not even close (opposite direction). When they complain, politely end the ride. 30 of these in one day will probably get you deactivated.


----------



## Jay Dean (Apr 3, 2015)

Sorry didn’t read through thread but has anyone asked to be deactivated for ‘lyft’ or went to the hub for a formal deactivation by request? I keep getting emails and would rather they take me off list then to just ignore them, what is the best process? I’m not going to play games to get deactivated, too old for that shit and don’t care to cause disruption, just want the stink off me and to not be bothered by lyft after rate changes..thanks


----------



## Stevie The magic Unicorn (Apr 3, 2018)

Jay Dean said:


> Sorry didn't read through thread but has anyone asked to be deactivated for 'lyft' or went to the hub for a formal deactivation by request? I keep getting emails and would rather they take me off list then to just ignore them, what is the best process? I'm not going to play games to get deactivated, too old for that shit and don't care to cause disruption, just want the stink off me and to not be bothered by lyft after rate changes..thanks


Yes, as far as I know insurance companies demand you show a letter from Uber/lyft that you are officially done for insurance purposes and they have been providing them.


----------



## burgerflipper (Jun 23, 2017)

demand a $10 cash tip from each pax. mention this multiple times throughout the ride and that you wont unlock the doors until they give you.


----------



## burgerflipper (Jun 23, 2017)

soak your clothing in a tub of beer before setting out.

wait for uber to freeze your account.

when they reach out to you to "hear your side", present an impassioned defense:

"it was only a few drops, honest!"

"oh come on, ive had more than that in the past and no one complained until now..."

guaranteed deactivation within 5 days.


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## Uberdriver914 (Jun 15, 2019)

I’ll just say I support trump & “MAGA”

Where my 10 mil plzzzzzzzz


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