# Sir and Ma'am



## Zaarc (Jan 21, 2019)

I like to call men Sir. like 'here you go Sir', "Thank you sir." "Have a good day sir." all that. But when it is a woman, I just cant bring myself to say Ma'am. I suspect that many women don't like it either. Any thoughts on this?


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## Fozzie (Aug 11, 2018)

Thousands of rides in, I don't think I've ever called a passenger sir or ma'am. Rather than trying to be so formal, try relaxing a bit and drop the titles.


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## Zaarc (Jan 21, 2019)

Fozzie said:


> Thousands of rides in, I don't think I've ever called a passenger sir or ma'am. Rather than trying to be so formal, try relaxing a bit and drop the titles.


not really being formal. It's just an appellation....like mac or buddy. something to tack on to the end of a greeting or goodbye. Sir is respectful and neutral..not too familiar ..like pal or bro. Just looking for a female version of that. Certainly not gonna say Hon or Doll or Babe.


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## Fozzie (Aug 11, 2018)

Using any sort of title just feels fake to me, and I think that some passengers feel/act self entitled when you use it. Calling me hon, doll or babe certainly are a no-go, but if you feel you MUST use a title, ma'am is still the one that I believe to be most neutral.


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## MadTownUberD (Mar 11, 2017)

Ya I agree...ma'am is the most neutral. If you say Miss and they're married they might be offended.

But it also occurred to me that you have to be sensitive in case someone gender identifies differently than what you would think initially. So maybe just use the person's name?


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## MHR (Jul 23, 2017)

If you look like a dude, I’m using Sir. If you look like a woman, I’m using Ma’am. Generally, I only use Sir or Ma’am if someone’s older than I am or if I'm being cheeky. 

My son's bus driver calls me ”doll”, an old hippie friend calls me ”babe”. I don't care as they're both used as terms of affection by a generation older than me, however I highly suggest you don't use those terms for pax.


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## MadTownUberD (Mar 11, 2017)

MHR said:


> If you look like a dude, I'm using Sir. If you look like a woman, I'm using Ma'am. Generally, I only use Sir or Ma'am if someone's older than I am or if I'm being cheeky.
> 
> My son's bus driver calls me "doll", an old hippie friend calls me "babe". I don't care as they're both used as terms of affection by a generation older than me, however I highly suggest you don't use those terms for pax.


Sexy female pax called me "boo" once, then quickly apologized. I enjoyed it.


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## Christinebitg (Jun 29, 2018)

Sir and ma'am work fine down here in Texas. You hear them a lot, not just in settings that require formalities.

"Hon" works well here too. I know that in other parts of the country, they're considered too familiar. But "honey" is going to sound condescending, especially when a woman says it to a man.

"Dear" would probably get you funny looks, unless you actually have an intimate relationship. As opposed to just wishing you did. LOL


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## JimD (Oct 25, 2017)

I typically do a half-turn towards the passenger side, look back, and say a smiling, "good morning, my friend, how are you?"....... it always gets a response in return, whether it is pleasant or curt....... i say it with confidence and a it has a positive connotation and i think it sets the tone for the ride...... my rides are way over one thousand and my rating is 4.99........ keep on truckin'........  (also, if there is any conversation during the ride, i refer to them by name or, if i cannot pronounce it, ask them for help......never been an issue...)


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## The_Solo (Feb 23, 2019)

I use sir and ma’am on probably 100% of rides. It’s terms I use normally. I am 37 and I use them whether they are younger or older than me. After verifing the passangers names when they get it I don’t remember it plus you never know if they are the account holder or a friend ordered it. So to me sir and ma’am is just neutral title I call them throughout the ride.


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## Uberfunitis (Oct 21, 2016)

Sir and Ma'am work fine I believe. Part of me wants to delve deeper into the subconscious, why someone would feel comfortable using Sir but not feel Ma'am is just as comfortable.


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## Cableguynoe (Feb 14, 2017)

MadTownUberD said:


> But it also occurred to me that you have to be sensitive in case someone gender identifies differently than what you would think initially. So maybe just use the person's name?


Yea im not going to start worrying about what they might want to be called. 
Thats harder than trying to guess if a chubby woman is pregnant.

Like @MHR said, im going to go off your looks, just like when I'm trying to score. 
If i get your gender wrong... please tell me. 
Please!


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## 1.5xorbust (Nov 22, 2017)

I usually address pax as ‘you’. As in, “Would you like to tip me?”


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## MadTownUberD (Mar 11, 2017)

1.5xorbust said:


> I usually address pax as 'you'. As in, "Would you like to tip me?"


just so you know, your username is now obsolete. An artifact from a by gone era.


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## 1.5xorbust (Nov 22, 2017)

MadTownUberD said:


> just so you know, your username is now obsolete. An artifact from a by gone era.


I am painfully aware.


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## mark_mark (Aug 26, 2017)

If you miss Gender somebody you can get Kicked off the Uber app... here a list of my suggested gender pro-nouns


He/She -- Zie, Sie, Ey, Ve, Tey, E
Him/Her -- Zim, Sie, Em, Ver, Ter, Em
His/Her -- Zir, Hir, Eir, Vis, Tem, Eir
His/Hers -- Zis, Hirs, Eirs, Vers, Ters, Eirs
Himself/Herself -- Zieself, Hirself, Eirself, Verself, Terself, Emself


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## AnotherUberGuy (Oct 26, 2018)

Same as @Christinebitg . In DFW, everybody is Sir or Ma'am, because most of us were brought up to say that. And if anybody gets bent out of shape about it, they are not natives of Texas and I'm not too bothered by it.


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## mark_mark (Aug 26, 2017)

AnotherUberGuy said:


> Same as @Christinebitg . In DFW, everybody is Sir or Ma'am, because most of us were brought up to say that. And if anybody gets bent out of shape about it, they are not natives of Texas and I'm not too bothered by it.


I would suggest a neutral gender pronoun.. here a list


They/them/their/themself
tey/tem/ter/temself
ey/em/eir/emself
e/em/eir/emself
thon/thon/thons/thonself
fae/faer/faers/faerself
vae/vaer/vaers/vaerself 
ae/aer/aers/aerself
ne/nym/nis/nymself
ne/nem/nir/nemself
xe/xem/xyr/xemself
xe/xim/xis/ximself
xie/xem/xyr/xemself
ze(or zie)/zir/zirs/zirself
zhe/zhir/zhirs/zhirself
ze/hir/hirs/hirself
sie/sier/siers/sierself
zed/zed/zeds/zedself
zed/zed/zeir/zedself
ce/cir/cirs/cirself
co/cos/cos/coself
ve/vis/vir/verself
jee/jem/jeir/jemself
lee/lim/lis/limself
kye/kyr/kyne/kyrself
per/per/pers/perself
hu/hum/hus/humself
bun/bun/buns/bunself
it/it/its/itself


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## Pax Collector (Feb 18, 2018)

Cableguynoe said:


> im going to go off your looks, just like when I'm trying to score.
> If i get your gender wrong... please tell me.
> Please!


Smart drivers know to check under the hood before going on a test drive.


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## TomTheAnt (Jan 1, 2019)

Never been quite the PC person, so it’s either Sir or Ma’am. If you have a problem with that, then so be it.


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## mark_mark (Aug 26, 2017)

Pax Collector said:


> Smart drivers know to check under the hood before going on a test drive.


I just check my Prius upskirt cam(s)



TomTheAnt said:


> Never been quite the PC person, so it's either Sir or Ma'am. If you have a problem with that, then so be it.


in the UK you can get fined and/or imprisonments for miss gendering someone

coming soon in Canada, CA, and NY AOC district


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## Christinebitg (Jun 29, 2018)

mark_mark said:


> I would suggest a neutral gender pronoun.. here a list
> 
> 
> They/them/their/themself
> ...


You're going to WAY too much trouble. If I unintentionally misgender someone, I say I'm sorry and then make sure I use what they told me.

If there's any doubt, I can use the plural, which is becoming more widely accepted as a gender neutral alternative.


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## mark_mark (Aug 26, 2017)

Christinebitg said:


> You're going to WAY too much trouble. If I unintentionally misgender someone, I say I'm sorry and then make sure I use what they told me.
> 
> If there's any doubt, I can use the plural, which is becoming more widely accepted as a gender neutral alternative.


I wish it was that simple, in Seattle you(sorry if I miss-gender) have to be exactly on the money... That's why I pretend to not speak english


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## Christinebitg (Jun 29, 2018)

mark_mark said:


> in Seattle you(sorry if I miss-gender) have to be exactly on the money


You're entitled to your opinion. Mine is that you're wrong about how it is where YOU live.

Anyone who gets offended that easily is looking for a fight.

I've been to Seattle. My brother and his wife live in Bellevue. I used to go to Anacortes on business. My uncle works in Edmonds.


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## BigRedDriver (Nov 28, 2018)

I try to use the name. Ma’am or sir second. “My friend” also works, and with some, illicit s very positive responses.


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## mark_mark (Aug 26, 2017)

Christinebitg said:


> You're entitled to your opinion. Mine is that you're wrong about how it is where YOU live.
> 
> Anyone who gets offended that easily is looking for a fight.
> 
> I've been to Seattle. My brother and his wife live in Bellevue. I used to go to Anacortes on business. My uncle works in Edmonds.


those towns are not Seattle... they are the East Side and the Country

here in Seattle, we have Council Person Kshama Sawant to reglate our morality


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## Christinebitg (Jun 29, 2018)

mark_mark said:


> those towns are not Seattle... they are the East Side and the Country
> 
> here in Seattle, we have Council Person Kshama Sawant to reglate our morality


That council person could kiss my *ss. I suggest you take the same approach.


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## mark_mark (Aug 26, 2017)

Christinebitg said:


> That council person could kiss my *ss. I suggest you take the same approach.


you're mean... feelings is hurt! there should be laws against hate speech


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## welikecamping (Nov 27, 2018)

I always use sir or ma'am, everywhere. If I offend someone by being polite, it would seem they have bigger issues. I would not mind being corrected for whatever way you wish me to address yourself, and I would do my best to accommodate. It's just basic gentlemanly code of honor conduct to me.


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## mark_mark (Aug 26, 2017)

welikecamping said:


> I always use sir or ma'am, everywhere. If I offend someone by being polite, it would seem they have bigger issues. I would not mind being corrected for whatever way you wish me to address yourself, and I would do my best to accommodate. It's just basic gentlemanly code of honor conduct to me.


Shivery is dead


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## TomTheAnt (Jan 1, 2019)

mark_mark said:


> in the UK you can get fined and/or imprisonments for miss gendering someone
> 
> coming soon in Canada, CA, and NY AOC district


Pretty sure that ain't coming to Texas and that's the I like it! Well... Austin, maybe, but that's whole 'nother ballgame, anyway... :biggrin:

I'm equal opportunity offender. If somebody wants to correct me in a polite way, then of course I will accomodate. If somebody wants to get a hissy fit, 1* me or what ever, then that's their prerogative. 

So far no problems at all and I do tend to get along with people, anyway. I'm not as grumpy as I may sound. LOL!


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## Rakos (Sep 2, 2014)

mark_mark said:


> Shivery is dead


Oh no my friend....

Chivalry is NOT dead....8>)

Even a monkey knows that....8>O

Butt...I do have to admit....

That some humans have trouble...

Grasping the concept....8>)

Rakos


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## mark_mark (Aug 26, 2017)

TomTheAnt said:


> Pretty sure that ain't coming to Texas and that's the I like it! Well... Austin, maybe, but that's whole 'nother ballgame, anyway... :biggrin:
> 
> I'm equal opportunity offender. If somebody wants to correct me in a polite way, then of course I will accomodate. If somebody wants to get a hissy fit, 1* me or what ever, then that's their prerogative.
> 
> So far no problems at all and I do tend to get along with people, anyway. I'm not as grumpy as I may sound. LOL!


we thought the same in Seattle, Ca took over, and now .22 rifles are "Assault Wepons"


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## MadTownUberD (Mar 11, 2017)

mark_mark said:


> we thought the same in Seattle, Ca took over, and now .22 rifles are "Assault Wepons"


You can get 10-round magazines for them. Oh the horrah!


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

Zaarc said:


> I like to call men Sir. like 'here you go Sir', "Thank you sir." "Have a good day sir." all that. But when it is a woman, I just cant bring myself to say Ma'am. I suspect that many women don't like it either. Any thoughts on this?


Definitely a cultural thing. Here in Virginia, "sir and ma'am" is expected. We also hold doors and jump in to help anyone in need, such as pushing stalled cars.

Naturally, parts of the state aren't the same. Northern Virginia wants to be NYC and a lot of people are entitled jerks.



mark_mark said:


> we thought the same in Seattle, Ca took over, and now .22 rifles are "Assault Wepons"


Seriously?!

"Honey", "darling", "sweetheart", etc is also thrown around in some places. I used to have a partner in EMS that called patients one or all of the above, it annoyed the hell out of me because it felt disrespectful and too familiar. One night, a tough old lady said "I'm not your 'sweetheart', I'm Mrs.." I laughed my ass off. Hated that guy.


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## Lissetti (Dec 20, 2016)

Benjamin M said:


> Seriously?!


No.....he's trolling you. I live in Seattle, I have a concealed carry permit, and I own a 380 semi auto handgun and a Mossberg 550 shotgun.


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

Lissetti said:


> No.....he's trolling you. I live in Seattle, I have a concealed carry permit, and I own a 380 semi auto handgun and a Mossberg 550 shotgun.


My EDC is a 9mm Smith & Wesson M&P Shield Performance Center. First was an SD9 VE, haven't touched that in ages. With a sale and rebate, paid less for the Shield than the SD9.


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## Lissetti (Dec 20, 2016)

Benjamin M said:


> My EDC is a 9mm Smith & Wesson M&P Shield Performance Center. First was an SD9 VE, haven't touched that in ages. With a sale and rebate, paid less for the Shield than the SD9.


Yeah I'm getting ready to retire the 380 and get a 9mm. I'm staying with the 550 series of Mossberg since I am a small female.


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## EcoboostMKS (Nov 6, 2015)

You're really calling people that pay $4 for a ride sir and maam? Pretend like you're deaf and don't say anything to these idiots.


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## steveK2016 (Jul 31, 2016)

EcoboostMKS said:


> You're really calling people that pay $4 for a ride sir and maam? Pretend like you're deaf and don't say anything to these idiots.


I dont recall ever saying sir or ma'am to any of my pax.


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## micmufman (Sep 5, 2018)

Zaarc said:


> not really being formal. It's just an appellation....like mac or buddy. something to tack on to the end of a greeting or goodbye. Sir is respectful and neutral..not too familiar ..like pal or bro. Just looking for a female version of that. Certainly not gonna say Hon or Doll or Babe.


I use sir or ma'am all the time, I have never had any complaints and I actually had a woman who commented to me about my politeness, she said something that's missing in todays world.


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## KobeWanKenobi (Feb 23, 2019)

Oh yeah. I call all female passengers Ma'am. Teenage girls, their first name.
All males, I call chief.


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## Bandit (Feb 12, 2019)

I’ve had pax where I couldn’t tell if they were a man or woman.


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## beezlewaxin (Feb 10, 2015)

I think this video is relevant:


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## Christinebitg (Jun 29, 2018)

Bandit said:


> I've had pax where I couldn't tell if they were a man or woman.


That's when we use the term "y'all" here.

And in case you're wondering, it can be singular or plural. But the preferred plural is "all y'all."


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## Zaarc (Jan 21, 2019)

beezlewaxin said:


> I think this video is relevant:


Oh my!


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

Lissetti said:


> Yeah I'm getting ready to retire the 380 and get a 9mm. I'm staying with the 550 series of Mossberg since I am a small female.


Kinda wish I had gone for a 40 but I stuck with 9mm because I figured it would just be easier at the range (often also known as a neighbor's back yard until I moved to the city).

This compact is also available in a 45, I gotta try one. If you aren't familiar with the platform, the Performance Center is ported and has fiber optic sights. The ports help with recoil but they're blinding in the dark, sights are also worthless without sufficient lighting.

What were we talking about again?? ?


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## Terri Lee (Jun 23, 2016)

I'll just go ahead and assume I'm older than almost all of you.

Being called "sir" is just an unwelcome reminder that I'm a geezer.

I don't love it, but it just goes with the territory, like most people holding doors open for me. Which is actually great!


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## Kleine Kaiser (Feb 23, 2019)

Zaarc said:


> not really being formal. It's just an appellation....like mac or buddy. something to tack on to the end of a greeting or goodbye. Sir is respectful and neutral..not too familiar ..like pal or bro. Just looking for a female version of that. Certainly not gonna say Hon or Doll or Babe.


Don't use ma'am for younger girl. Could imply they are married or older which could be interpreted as an insult. Save it for older women like 40s and up or if you see a wedding ring or with husband.


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## ZenUber (Feb 11, 2019)

I try to use their name whenever possible.

I might use Sir on occasion, but it's a spur of the moment judgement call as to weather or not I think he'll appreciate it.


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## Sacto Burbs (Dec 28, 2014)

Zaarc said:


> not really being formal. It's just an appellation....like mac or buddy. something to tack on to the end of a greeting or goodbye. Sir is respectful and neutral..not too familiar ..like pal or bro. Just looking for a female version of that. Certainly not gonna say Hon or Doll or Babe.


"Sir or Madam as the case may be" fits. Just call them all "Sport"


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## Z129 (May 30, 2018)

I've used sir, young sir, ma'am, miss, young miss, and young lady.


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## Another Uber Driver (May 27, 2015)

In Louisiana south of I-10 they say "_cha'_ " or "podnah".

I often say "Señor", "Sirrah", "Madame" or "Mademoiselle"


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## BuckleUp (Jan 18, 2018)

Zaarc said:


> I like to call men Sir. like 'here you go Sir', "Thank you sir." "Have a good day sir." all that. But when it is a woman, I just cant bring myself to say Ma'am. I suspect that many women don't like it either. Any thoughts on this?


Drop down a few pegs. What are you Jeeves the Butler? It's "dude" or "man". for a woman, call her "love". As in "thanks love". They like that.



mark_mark said:


> I would suggest a neutral gender pronoun.. here a list
> 
> 
> They/them/their/themself
> ...


. Has the world gone insane? WTF is all that crap? If you have a penis, you're a man. if you have a vagina, you're a woman. Case closed.



beezlewaxin said:


> I think this video is relevant:


Misgendered someone?
How sad the world is becoming. 
Dude should change his name to Tiff, not Tiffany, then he wouldn't be misgendered (when did that actually become a word??). those shoulders, giant Adams apple, man face and huge hands Trump would be jealous of.


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## Christinebitg (Jun 29, 2018)

Benjamin M said:


> sights are also worthless without sufficient lighting.


Laser sights. No external light required.

My Significant Other is a retired cop. He said that for getting people to comply, laser sights are by far the best.

They're a very graphic indication of exactly where the bullet is going to go.


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

Christinebitg said:


> Laser sights. No external light required.
> 
> My Significant Other is a retired cop. He said that for getting people to comply, laser sights are by far the best.
> 
> They're a very graphic indication of exactly where the bullet is going to go.


The Shield does not have a rail because it's small. There are options available but they cost more or the same as what I paid. And check my DM.


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## Cary Grant (Jul 14, 2015)

I was raised in the south. Proper manners are never optional.

Once in a blue moon, I get these unattractive women from somewhere up north, where manners were not taught in her home, and I'll hear her waxing off about being called "Ma'am."

If only she knew. Ma'am comes from Madam, which sprang from Ma Dame, going all the way back to the latin _Domina_. It means "Lady of the House." Key word: LADY.

It is the only honorific in Standard American English that essentially labels a woman as royalty, or a member of the nobility, even when she's not.

Here in the South (southeastern and southwestern US), _ma'am_ is used to address any female, regardless of her age or position. Unless she cannot understand normal thinking.


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

Cary Grant said:


> I was raised in the south. Proper manners are never optional.
> 
> Once in a blue moon, I get these unattractive women from somewhere up north, where manners were not taught in her home, and I'll hear her waxing off about being called "Ma'am."
> 
> ...


Very well said. Our Moms raised us right


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## FLKeys (Dec 27, 2018)

I just use Cuz, it is gender neutral. Yo Cuz where we going. Yo Cuz this is your stop. Hey Cuz have a good night.


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## hrswartz (Jan 4, 2019)

I use the name they booked the ride with... when guys wives book the ride it's an ice breaker... same for the gals whose hubby's have booked but sometimes younger riders use nick names or just initials... them I just ignore. idiots


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## Clothahump (Mar 31, 2018)

Zaarc said:


> I like to call men Sir. like 'here you go Sir', "Thank you sir." "Have a good day sir." all that. But when it is a woman, I just cant bring myself to say Ma'am. I suspect that many women don't like it either. Any thoughts on this?


Yes. Use it. Who cares if they like it or not? You're simply showing basic respect and courtesy.


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## mbd (Aug 27, 2018)

JimD said:


> I typically do a half-turn towards the passenger side, look back, and say a smiling, "good morning, my friend, how are you?"....... it always gets a response in return, whether it is pleasant or curt....... i say it with confidence and a it has a positive connotation and i think it sets the tone for the ride...... my rides are way over one thousand and my rating is 4.99........ keep on truckin'........ :smiles: (also, if there is any conversation during the ride, i refer to them by name or, if i cannot pronounce it, ask them for help......never been an issue...)


I always use first name , then thank you 
Sir-If it is somebody way older, I might use it


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## goneubering (Aug 17, 2017)

Zaarc said:


> I like to call men Sir. like 'here you go Sir', "Thank you sir." "Have a good day sir." all that. But when it is a woman, I just cant bring myself to say Ma'am. I suspect that many women don't like it either. Any thoughts on this?


I do it. Why does it bother you?



mbd said:


> I always use first name , then thank you
> Sir-If it is somebody way older, I might use it


Good point. I mostly just call them by their name.


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## SuzeCB (Oct 30, 2016)

Cary Grant said:


> I was raised in the south. Proper manners are never optional.
> 
> Once in a blue moon, I get these unattractive women from somewhere up north, where manners were not taught in her home, and I'll hear her waxing off about being called "Ma'am."
> 
> ...


See, now you've gone and done it!

The pax that lurk in this forum are going to see this and start demanding that their U/L drivers refer to them as "Domina/Dominus"!

SPARTICUS! SPAR-TI-CUS!!


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## Christinebitg (Jun 29, 2018)

Cary Grant said:


> I was raised in the south. Proper manners are never optional.


Thank you, sir.



Cary Grant said:


> Here in the South (southeastern and southwestern US), _ma'am_ is used to address any female, regardless of her age or position.


I agree, although obviously you could use "miss" at times. Technically for a woman who has never been married, or who you might take not to be.

Either way, it's better than "Yo, lady!" 



goneubering said:


> Good point. I mostly just call them by their name.


This whole thread reminds me of a song that Steve Goodman wrote and David Allen Coe covered.


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## Acheese11 (Nov 8, 2018)

a lot of people call me ma'am. It makes me feel old and ugly. Didn't matter if I was 22, 32, or 42 when they called me ma'am, I hate it.


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## Christinebitg (Jun 29, 2018)

Acheese11 said:


> It makes me feel old and ugly.


There's an old Jefferson Airplane song that says:

"You're only pretty as you feel. Only pretty as you feel inside."

You probably grew up in the north, didn't you? I did, but I don't let it bother me.


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## Uberfunitis (Oct 21, 2016)

Somebody will hate what you do no matter what you do. Just look into your heart and if you know you were trying to do good than don't worry about it, otherwise reconsider.


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## Spike72 (Jan 18, 2017)

I have lots of friends who either identify as trans or non-binary. Trying to guess their gender or how they would like to be addressed is a zero sum equation. You will never be right 100% of the time. You could go the direct route and ask rider what pronouns they would prefer, but that's just another step between you and starting the ride.

I used to use the honorific 'guys' with no gender implied, and there are still some people who are sensitive to the connotation (whether intentional or not).

So, when I address people and don't want to trip over an unseen gender landmine, I will use the honorifics of either 'friend' or 'neighbor'.


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## Kurt Halfyard (Dec 13, 2017)

Benjamin M said:


> Kinda wish I had gone for a 40 but I stuck with 9mm because I figured it would just be easier at the range (often also known as a neighbor's back yard until I moved to the city).
> 
> This compact is also available in a 45, I gotta try one. If you aren't familiar with the platform, the Performance Center is ported and has fiber optic sights. The ports help with recoil but they're blinding in the dark, sights are also worthless without sufficient lighting.
> 
> What were we talking about again?? ?


American Gun Culture is scary to Canadians. You guys are so casual with deadly weapons.


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## FLKeys (Dec 27, 2018)

Benjamin M said:


> Kinda wish I had gone for a 40 but I stuck with 9mm because I figured it would just be easier at the range (often also known as a neighbor's back yard until I moved to the city).
> 
> This compact is also available in a 45, I gotta try one. If you aren't familiar with the platform, the Performance Center is ported and has fiber optic sights. The ports help with recoil but they're blinding in the dark, sights are also worthless without sufficient lighting.
> 
> What were we talking about again?? ?


I dislike porting especially in a Self defense gun. Shoot one at night, blinding enough without porting, add in porting and the upward flash makes it even more blinding.

When I'm in my home county I prefer to carry my .380acp, when I know I will be leaving my county I step it up to a compact .45acp. My compact .45 is a great shooter as the recoil is more of a push back than anything. I'm not a big fan of the .40 S&W, I prefer a 9mm with quality JHP and higher capacity over the snappy compact .40's.

My advice is get what you are comfortable with, practice often, and be safe.



Kurt Halfyard said:


> American Gun Culture is scary to Canadians. You guys are so casual with deadly weapons.


Does not need to be scary. Some basic common sense and understanding of the 3 (or 4 depending on who you talk to) gun safety rule goes a long way.


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## Kurt Halfyard (Dec 13, 2017)

FLKeys said:


> Does not need to be scary. Some basic common sense and understanding of the 3 (or 4 depending on who you talk to) gun safety rule goes a long way.


Fair. For every 10,000 persons with basic understanding of gun safety and responsibility, there is this in a country of 350,000,000:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_mass_shootings_in_the_United_States#2018
This sort of awfulness doesn't happen anywhere else in the world (except perhaps Kenya/Somalia/Syria and they have organized domestic terror groups and GDPs of the state of Florida at best).
I know this debate has been going on forever, and all sides have dug in irrationally into their positions on it, *but maybe, just maybe,* America has a problem with its casual conceal-and-carry relationship with guns.
Seeing ride-share drivers discuss it like they are discussing what type of fuel they put into their car, or what flavour of tea the drink on the job is profoundly disturbing to us in 'the rest of the world.'

_** Sorry to derail this thread. It was just an observation from an outsider_


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## FLKeys (Dec 27, 2018)

Kurt Halfyard said:


> Fair. For every 10,000 persons with basic understanding of gun safety and responsibility, there is this in a country of 350,000,000:
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_mass_shootings_in_the_United_States#2018
> This sort of awfulness doesn't happen anywhere else in the world (except perhaps Kenya/Somalia/Syria and they have organized domestic terror groups and GDPs of the state of Florida at best).
> ...


Don't want to derail thread either but I don't want to blame a tool for a society issue. And I don't want to punish law abiding citizens because of a society issue. Just look at all the knife violence in the UK, take one tool away and another tool will be substituted in. Fix society don't take tools.


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## Kurt Halfyard (Dec 13, 2017)

FLKeys said:


> Don't want to derail thread either but I don't want to blame a tool for a society issue. And I don't want to punish law abiding citizens because of a society issue. Just look at all the knife violence in the UK, take one tool away and another tool will be substituted in. Fix society don't take tools.


I am profoundly sorry you believe in such deluded nonsense. The rest of the world functions find without these 'tools' Most allow long guns (which are hunting tools) but don't allow hand-guns and assault rifiles (which are murder tools). But sure, keep believe that 'mass murder' is a big deal in 1st world nations at the same per-capita scale as the USA. I'm sure that lie is very comforting.


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## kc ub'ing! (May 27, 2016)

I reserve sir and ma’am for riders older than me. Everybody else gets, ‘brother, girl, buddy, partner, etc’. I’m pretty informal. No negative impact due to salutation yet.


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## Jay Dean (Apr 3, 2015)

I just say thanks y’all if more then one and have a good one for a single pax, keep it simple, my tips flow and my rating stays high. Just drive them and keep it chill without doing anything special above driving point A to B


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

FLKeys said:


> I dislike porting especially in a Self defense gun. Shoot one at night, blinding enough without porting, add in porting and the upward flash makes it even more blinding.
> 
> When I'm in my home county I prefer to carry my .380acp, when I know I will be leaving my county I step it up to a compact .45acp. My compact .45 is a great shooter as the recoil is more of a push back than anything. I'm not a big fan of the .40 S&W, I prefer a 9mm with quality JHP and higher capacity over the snappy compact .40's.
> 
> ...


I've fired it at night, it's not that horrible. I capp it the V for Victory. I had a tac light on it for a while, which helped, but decided to get rid of it because it was so under powered (Shield doesn't have a rail and is single stack, so lights have to be tiny).



Kurt Halfyard said:


> American Gun Culture is scary to Canadians. You guys are so casual with deadly weapons.


I don't take it casually at all. I was raised to respect firearms by my grandfather (he didn't raise me, just that aspect), a World War II veteran. He wanted his grandson to be able to survive in combat should the draft ever return and be responsible if I ever decided to carry a firearm, which I decided to start doing about three years ago.

I strongly believe that our gun laws and regulations are way too lax in America. I passed a background check, handed cash across the counter, and left the store an armed American in less than half an hour. I could have slapped it on my hip right away but I find that vulgar so I waited for my concealed carry permit, which required a basic safety class and $50. (All of this varies drastically from state to state, I live in Virginia - very lax laws).

I am glad to be able to carry, which I do daily, but I am not blind to the problems we have with gun violence.

K back on topic, sorry, sorry.. ?


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## Christinebitg (Jun 29, 2018)

Be careful with the statistics. What some people call "mass shootings" can be a bit lax.

The classic is when two people get shot in one incident, and then it's labelled a mass shooting. Regrettable, obviously, but not exactly what most people consider a mass shooting.

Personally, I have no problem law abiding, God fearing citizens packing all the firepower they can carry. But refer back to those two qualifiers if in doubt.


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## CJfrom619 (Apr 27, 2017)

Zaarc said:


> I like to call men Sir. like 'here you go Sir', "Thank you sir." "Have a good day sir." all that. But when it is a woman, I just cant bring myself to say Ma'am. I suspect that many women don't like it either. Any thoughts on this?


Guys like being called sir because men see it as a sign of respect but calling a female Ma'am regardless of their age makes them feel old. I dont ever say Ma'am to a female rider.

A little trick i like to use is when i get a group of 2-4 older women (35+) is to say " ok girls have a good day/night" when they exit. Older women love that because it makes them feel young and a better shot at a tip.


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## JohnnyBravo836 (Dec 5, 2018)

CJfrom619 said:


> A little trick i like to use is when i get a group of 2-4 older women (35+) is to say " ok girls have a good day/night" when they exit. Older women love that because it makes them feel young and a better shot at a tip.


For groups of females, I have found that "ladies" seems to work well across the board, irrespective of age, education, social class, etc.: "ladies, have a good evening".

Interestingly, no matter how vulgar, crass and lowbrow they are, this invariably goes over just fine. Last weekend there were two young women in their 20s who I picked up at a hookah bar: they spent the entire ride swearing like sailors and yelling at each other about weed; when I said "ladies, have a good evening", they were not, shall we say, sensitive to the obvious irony and sarcasm that might have been readily apparent to those with more subtle sensibilities. ?


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## MiamiKid (May 24, 2016)

Fozzie said:


> Thousands of rides in, I don't think I've ever called a passenger sir or ma'am. Rather than trying to be so formal, try relaxing a bit and drop the titles.


I'm old fashion and use Sir/Ma'am all the time. Class and courtesy.


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## ZenUber (Feb 11, 2019)

SuzeCB said:


> See, now you've gone and done it!
> 
> The pax that lurk in this forum are going to see this and start demanding that their U/L drivers refer to them as "Domina/Dominus"!
> 
> SPARTICUS! SPAR-TI-CUS!!


PAX lurk in this forum?


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## Fozzie (Aug 11, 2018)

MiamiKid said:


> I'm old fashion and use Sir/Ma'am all the time. Class and courtesy.


Usage of titles is more customary in certain regions, like in the SE USA, and also tends to be more prevalent with groups like military veterans. Not using them, however, doesn't make you "less classy," just less formal.


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## MiamiKid (May 24, 2016)

Fozzie said:


> Usage of titles is more customary in certain regions, like in the SE USA, and also tends to be more prevalent with groups like military veterans. Not using them, however, doesn't make you "less classy," just less formal.


Never said not using made for less classy.


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## SuzeCB (Oct 30, 2016)

Fozzie said:


> Usage of titles is more customary in certain regions, like in the SE USA, and also tends to be more prevalent with groups like military veterans. Not using them, however, doesn't make you "less classy," just less formal.


My son has Autism. He doesn't always perceive or understand the nuances of different types of relationships. So, in his mind as a child, the neighbors we grilled with on the weekend were his friends the same as the neighborhood children he played with.

Nowadays, many adults aren't comfortable being called Mr/s. in informal situations, and when introduced, even to a young child, will say, "Oh, call me Bill!"

I would quickly correct my son to "Mr. Bill", because his friendship with an adult was NOT the same as his friendship with other kids. There is a different level of authority and respect due, IMO.

And it did help. A lot.

Formality seems frivolous in our society, but it can help keep things clear, too.


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## Fozzie (Aug 11, 2018)

SuzeCB said:


> My son has Autism. He doesn't always perceive or understand the nuances of different types of relationships. So, in his mind as a child, the neighbors we grilled with on the weekend were his friends the same as the neighborhood children he played with.
> 
> Nowadays, many adults aren't comfortable being called Mr/s. in informal situations, and when introduced, even to a young child, will say, "Oh, call me Bill!"
> 
> ...


I agree absolutely. Formality has its place, especially when rearing children, but my point was that, to me, it seems unnecessarily uptight when driving Uber X.

I apologize for a somewhat vague posting earlier. I really need to stop checking UP and responding to posts at 2am.


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## thepeach (Jan 22, 2018)

MHR said:


> If you look like a dude, I'm using Sir. If you look like a woman, I'm using Ma'am. Generally, I only use Sir or Ma'am if someone's older than I am or if I'm being cheeky.
> 
> My son's bus driver calls me "doll", an old hippie friend calls me "babe". I don't care as they're both used as terms of affection by a generation older than me, however I highly suggest you don't use those terms for pax.


I drive in Chicago and love all sorts of people. Chicago is very diverse. When three passengers are in the car and I don't know names, singing along with the zippy songs on the radio means we don't need to share any names. Wink


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## MiamiKid (May 24, 2016)

ZenUber said:


> PAX lurk in this forum?


Yep


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

ZenUber said:


> PAX lurk in this forum?


if they do Lurk... I would like them to know:

You Suck!


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## TwoFiddyMile (Mar 13, 2015)

I live in the South. Sir and ma'am are part of the landscape. Especially ma'am.
Also please and thank you.
They may hate me due to my Northern roots, but they hate me politely.


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

in this day and age... we should consider other Gender Pronouns!

Here's a small list of suggested Gender Pronouns


He/She -- Zie, Sie, Ey, Ve, Tey, E
Him/Her -- Zim, Sie, Em, Ver, Ter, Em
His/Her -- Zir, Hir, Eir, Vis, Tem, Eir
His/Hers -- Zis, Hirs, Eirs, Vers, Ters, Eirs
Himself/Herself -- Zieself, Hirself, Eirself, Verself, Terself, Emself

Also, Pax should be refered to by Neutral gender pronouns. here's a list:


They/them/their/themself
tey/tem/ter/temself
ey/em/eir/emself
e/em/eir/emself
thon/thon/thons/thonself
fae/faer/faers/faerself
vae/vaer/vaers/vaerself 
ae/aer/aers/aerself
ne/nym/nis/nymself
ne/nem/nir/nemself
xe/xem/xyr/xemself
xe/xim/xis/ximself
xie/xem/xyr/xemself
ze(or zie)/zir/zirs/zirself
zhe/zhir/zhirs/zhirself
ze/hir/hirs/hirself
sie/sier/siers/sierself
zed/zed/zeds/zedself
zed/zed/zeir/zedself
ce/cir/cirs/cirself
co/cos/cos/coself
ve/vis/vir/verself
jee/jem/jeir/jemself
lee/lim/lis/limself
kye/kyr/kyne/kyrself
per/per/pers/perself
hu/hum/hus/humself
bun/bun/buns/bunself
it/it/its/itself
You Are Welcome!


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## goneubering (Aug 17, 2017)

Zaarc said:


> I like to call men Sir. like 'here you go Sir', "Thank you sir." "Have a good day sir." all that. But when it is a woman, I just cant bring myself to say Ma'am. I suspect that many women don't like it either. Any thoughts on this?


I do it. Never had a complaint.


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## W00dbutcher (Jan 14, 2019)

mark_mark said:


> If you miss Gender somebody you can get Kicked off the Uber app... here a list of my suggested gender pro-nouns
> 
> 
> He/She -- Zie, Sie, Ey, Ve, Tey, E
> ...


Its a damnn eye chart!

Mr or miss.... Or shorty in the right neighborhoods.


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## Clothahump (Mar 31, 2018)

Samman said:


> in this day and age... we should consider other Gender Pronouns!
> 
> Here's a small list of suggested Gender Pronouns
> 
> ...


There are two pronouns: he/she. Possibly it, depending on how bad it is.

There is no such thing as a gender neutral pronoun. Gender neutrality is total bullshit. If you're a guy, you're a guy. Same for the gals. No amount of surgery is going to change those basic facts.


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## Mkang14 (Jun 29, 2019)

Zaarc said:


> I like to call men Sir. like 'here you go Sir', "Thank you sir." "Have a good day sir." all that. But when it is a woman, I just cant bring myself to say Ma'am. I suspect that many women don't like it either. Any thoughts on this?


I love "Ma'am" to me it's a sign of respect. Part of our team is in india and North Carolina and they say Ma'am. I love it. It also makes them non threatening and may allow people to let their guard down a little.


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

I’m in Seattle, G mob will tear U a new one for Miss Gendering!


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## The Gift of Fish (Mar 17, 2017)

Zaarc said:


> I like to call men Sir. like 'here you go Sir', "Thank you sir." "Have a good day sir." all that. But when it is a woman, I just cant bring myself to say Ma'am. I suspect that many women don't like it either. Any thoughts on this?


Calling people sir is... like... ohmygod!... suuuuch a cute little Colonial quirk you fellas have!


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## Wolfgang Faust (Aug 2, 2018)

Zaarc said:


> I like to call men Sir. like 'here you go Sir', "Thank you sir." "Have a good day sir." all that. But when it is a woman, I just cant bring myself to say Ma'am. I suspect that many women don't like it either. Any thoughts on this?


I always say Ma'am.

Immediatly after picking up a nice couple several weeks ago, saw a guy chasing his significant other with a shopping cart screaming "Get in the basket , Ho"


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## TwoFiddyMile (Mar 13, 2015)

Samman said:


> I'm in Seattle, G mob will tear U a new one for Miss Gendering!


Miss Gender can find her own seat in the bus TYVM.


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## Disgusted38 (Dec 18, 2018)

Zaarc said:


> I like to call men Sir. like 'here you go Sir', "Thank you sir." "Have a good day sir." all that. But when it is a woman, I just cant bring myself to say Ma'am. I suspect that many women don't like it either. Any thoughts on this?


I always say, thank you ______ and have nice day, eve, morning..whichever applies. People like hearing their names.


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## The Gift of Fish (Mar 17, 2017)

Samman said:


> in this day and age... we should consider other Gender Pronouns!
> 
> Here's a small list of suggested Gender Pronouns
> 
> ...


I don't want to become a woman. Instead I may decide that I want to be a panda bear. It's a fitting animal - just sits around eating and has sex once every five years. Anyway, if so then I would require everyone to use the pronoun "bear" when referring to me. Although that may have certain connotations and attract unwanted attention. ?‍♂


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## reg barclay (Nov 3, 2015)

The Gift of Fish said:


> Calling people sir is...


Never got used to that one myself. Seems to mean something quite different to how we use it back in Blighty.


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## UberBeemer (Oct 23, 2015)

Zaarc said:


> I like to call men Sir. like 'here you go Sir', "Thank you sir." "Have a good day sir." all that. But when it is a woman, I just cant bring myself to say Ma'am. I suspect that many women don't like it either. Any thoughts on this?


I usually use "young lady". It seems pretty well received even with women who aren't necessarily young.


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## The Gift of Fish (Mar 17, 2017)

reg barclay said:


> Never got used to that one myself. Seems to mean something quite different to how we use it back in Blighty.


Yes, sir. Suit you, sir. Ooooh!


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## Christinebitg (Jun 29, 2018)

Clothahump said:


> There is no such thing as a gender neutral pronoun. Gender neutrality is total bullshit.


You are wrong.

"They" is gender neutral. You may have noticed that it's the correct pronoun to use when the subject word of your sentence is human and plural.


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## sellkatsell44 (Oct 25, 2015)

Clothahump said:


> There are two pronouns: s/he.


FIFY


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## GreatWhiteHope (Sep 18, 2018)

Zaarc said:


> I like to call men Sir. like 'here you go Sir', "Thank you sir." "Have a good day sir." all that. But when it is a woman, I just cant bring myself to say Ma'am. I suspect that many women don't like it either. Any thoughts on this?


Say what ur comfortable with Bro

Bigger problems to deal with

I really like "ladies" for 2+ women pax


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## Clothahump (Mar 31, 2018)

Christinebitg said:


> You are wrong.
> 
> "They" is gender neutral. You may have noticed that it's the correct pronoun to use when the subject word of your sentence is human and plural.


In which case, there is no gender.



sellkatsell44 said:


> FIFY


No, you didn't. That's just an abbreviation.


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## sellkatsell44 (Oct 25, 2015)

Serious Q, what's the difference between gender neutral and no gender in the context of they/them?



Clothahump said:


> In which case, there is no gender.
> 
> 
> No, you didn't. That's just an abbreviation.


But it's one where it's better imho. Because it's grouped into one.


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## touberornottouber (Aug 12, 2016)

It depends on where you are -- the culture. In some places in the Southern U.S. it is almost expected if the person is older than you.


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