# I’m a sneaky MF😂



## JohnJames8678 (Jan 31, 2021)

Ok, so last night I got on Lyft and Uber for fun. So I get dressed up, hair looking super wavy, stubble, just pumped out some gym reps and took a few gym mirror selfie’s. I’m a tool for this I know :smiles: I’m feeling myself, hair grown out to my shoulders, six pack primed and ready, ultimate ****** energy. I decided to get on Lyft after my buddy canceled plans on me. Not wanted to go into a bar alone, I the idea of going on Lyft to find a date to the bar. I’m sneaky and remembered my old days how often I’d get asked to come in etc. So I’m like ok that’s the plan, pick up a passenger, let them ask you in, just sit there and be charming and sexy. I’ve been out of the game for awhile so I didn’t know if I could score. Boy let me tell you! Spend about an hour and half picking up randoms(No One hits on me!), I’m like wtf is going on, on a Saturday i used to have women go wild when getting in my car, then I realize it’s the mask! I need to take of my mask! That dang thing is hiding my face. So I go pick up my next rider mask free and what do you know it’s a group of chicks! The cute one walks up to my window looks at me is about to get into the back then switches up to the front, yeah baby we got one! They always give you that “wait this guy is hot as chit” look before getting in the front. They get in and boy the flirting and complements just start rolling, nothing about me not wearing a mask tho. The pictures come out, hey here’s my friends picture she'd love you, do you think she’s cute(she was fire btw!) she’s almost done with law school and is single. Here let me gave you her number! They are getting touchy and worked up as they enquire about my dating life and want scoops on the women. I’ll do this occasionally to show them I’m available and I Fk. I always make sure to stay cool and professional, talk in a lower voice and drive with one hand while putting a half smile of my face and holding the other hand up like Matthew McConaughey and the stupid Lincoln commercials. That works magic on em. I’m so lame ;P It’s fun watching grown women loose all basic functioning. I’m getting asked about my dating life, one of the women is older and asks if I think she’s cute, as the gentleman I am I told her she was STUNNING! She was actually not bad looking, but wanted to make her feel good about herself. She’s super happy now and is trying to set me up with her daughter in grad school. We get to the destination they all get out and I ask if I will pose for pictures with them. I couldn’t say no. As the cute one walks away I turn and ask “hey, do you wanna hang later?” Ok, someone finally found his balls! She says “come in right now with us” the other women I wasn’t interested in went crazy, pulling on my arm like school girls. I had to oblige, I wouldn’t want to disappoint. I park my car and had a fun night with these lovely people. Got drinks bought for me and exchanged funny stories. They were convinced I did this with all my Lyft passengers. No, just the special ones :wink: I had that BIG D energy last night. Gave it my all with little miss wants to play hard to get. Obviously I knew she thought I was attractive. I finally got the courage to shoot my shot and walked over to her and told her straight up into her ear, “your the best looking girl in this bar” she turns away and smiles that kind of smile like “dam this guy” she’s got one hand over her mouth trying to hide her face she puts it down and while bitting her lip. Gosh she looked so freaking adorable at that moment. Innocent and cheeks red. Can I get your number? I ask, she gives it to me “don’t text me, your gonna get me into trouble” I respond “I’m problematic”. I left soon after. Now I’m texting this really cute woman I met last night on Lyft who has a boyfriend. What should I do? Peace and love ☮ ❤


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## KevinJohnson (Mar 23, 2020)

Done this before.
If she has a boyfriend you meet her on a Monday afternoon like 12pm. You get take out and eat at your place. 
Causes less suspicion.


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## ANThonyBoreDaneCook (Oct 7, 2019)




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## The Gift of Fish (Mar 17, 2017)

ANThonyBoreDaneCook said:


> View attachment 575589


ROFLMAO :big grin:&#129315;:roflmao:

Nailed it.


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## Mash Ghasem (Jan 12, 2020)

I was thinking more along these lines:










... or this too:


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## Boca Ratman (Jun 6, 2018)

JohnJames8678 said:


> What should I do?


Leave the forum?


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## ANThonyBoreDaneCook (Oct 7, 2019)




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## Irishjohn831 (Aug 11, 2017)




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## Uber's Guber (Oct 22, 2017)

JohnJames8678 said:


> Now I'm texting this really cute woman I met last night on Lyft who has a boyfriend. What should I do?


Pinch yourself so you wake up from your dream.


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## ashlee2004 (Apr 19, 2019)

JohnJames8678 said:


> Ok, so last night I got on Lyft and Uber for fun. So I get dressed up, hair looking super wavy, stubble, just pumped out some gym reps and took a few gym mirror selfie's. I'm a tool for this I know :smiles: I'm feeling myself, hair grown out to my shoulders, six pack primed and ready, ultimate @@@@@@ energy. I decided to get on Lyft after my buddy canceled plans on me. Not wanted to go into a bar alone, I the idea of going on Lyft to find a date to the bar. I'm sneaky and remembered my old days how often I'd get asked to come in etc. So I'm like ok that's the plan, pick up a passenger, let them ask you in, just sit there and be charming and sexy. I've been out of the game for awhile so I didn't know if I could score. Boy let me tell you! Spend about an hour and half picking up randoms(No One hits on me!), I'm like wtf is going on, on a Saturday i used to have women go wild when getting in my car, then I realize it's the mask! I need to take of my mask! That dang thing is hiding my face. So I go pick up my next rider mask free and what do you know it's a group of chicks! The cute one walks up to my window looks at me is about to get into the back then switches up to the front, yeah baby we got one! They always give you that "wait this guy is hot as chit" look before getting in the front. They get in and boy the flirting and complements just start rolling, nothing about me not wearing a mask tho. The pictures come out, hey here's my friends picture she'd love you, do you think she's cute(she was fire btw!) she's almost done with law school and is single. Here let me gave you her number! They are getting touchy and worked up as they enquire about my dating life and want scoops on the women. I'll do this occasionally to show them I'm available and I Fk. I always make sure to stay cool and professional, talk in a lower voice and drive with one hand while putting a half smile of my face and holding the other hand up like Matthew McConaughey and the stupid Lincoln commercials. That works magic on em. I'm so lame ;P It's fun watching grown women loose all basic functioning. I'm getting asked about my dating life, one of the women is older and asks if I think she's cute, as the gentleman I am I told her she was STUNNING! She was actually not bad looking, but wanted to make her feel good about herself. She's super happy now and is trying to set me up with her daughter in grad school. We get to the destination they all get out and I ask if I will pose for pictures with them. I couldn't say no. As the cute one walks away I turn and ask "hey, do you wanna hang later?" Ok, someone finally found his balls! She says "come in right now with us" the other women I wasn't interested in went crazy, pulling on my arm like school girls. I had to oblige, I wouldn't want to disappoint. I park my car and had a fun night with these lovely people. Got drinks bought for me and exchanged funny stories. They were convinced I did this with all my Lyft passengers. No, just the special ones :wink: I had that BIG D energy last night. Gave it my all with little miss wants to play hard to get. Obviously I knew she thought I was attractive. I finally got the courage to shoot my shot and walked over to her and told her straight up into her ear, "your the best looking girl in this bar" she turns away and smiles that kind of smile like "dam this guy" she's got one hand over her mouth trying to hide her face she puts it down and while bitting her lip. Gosh she looked so freaking adorable at that moment. Innocent and cheeks red. Can I get your number? I ask, she gives it to me "don't text me, your gonna get me into trouble" I respond "I'm problematic". I left soon after. Now I'm texting this really cute woman I met last night on Lyft who has a boyfriend. What should I do? Peace and love ☮ ❤


I think I just threw up a little in the back of my mouth


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## Johnny Mnemonic (Sep 24, 2019)

tl;dr

Oh, and this...


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## Another Uber Driver (May 27, 2015)

Dear Penthouse:

I never used to believe your letters until........................


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## Shiietnaga (Apr 13, 2020)

Pics or it didn’t happen


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## WindyCityAnt (Feb 24, 2019)

This is a jacked up thread. LOL. No comment. Then i check where is this person from. Completely makes sense now. Yikes.

OP might be better off in Omaha, or Wichita.


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## ANThonyBoreDaneCook (Oct 7, 2019)

Let's review some of the highlights:



JohnJames8678 said:


> just pumped out some gym reps





JohnJames8678 said:


> gym mirror selfie's





JohnJames8678 said:


> six pack primed and ready





JohnJames8678 said:


> score





JohnJames8678 said:


> chicks!





JohnJames8678 said:


> They are getting touchy and worked





JohnJames8678 said:


> I'm available and I Fk





JohnJames8678 said:


> holding the other hand up like Matthew McConaughey





JohnJames8678 said:


> pulling on my arm like school girls





JohnJames8678 said:


> BIG D





JohnJames8678 said:


> Gosh





JohnJames8678 said:


> Innocent and cheeks red





JohnJames8678 said:


> I'm problematic


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## New2This (Dec 27, 2015)

ANThonyBoreDaneCook said:


> View attachment 575607


I'm getting my first haircut in months tomorrow. Needed an idea for a new hairstyle. Thanks bro.


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## ANThonyBoreDaneCook (Oct 7, 2019)




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## WindyCityAnt (Feb 24, 2019)

JohnJames8678 said:


> *Six pack primed and ready! (print this out and put on shirt with a photo of a ripped guys chest for fat dudes to wear)
> 
> *I'm problematic (Women, have my permission to use this in your dating bio)
> 
> ...


Your a weirdo bro. But keep going.


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## Mash Ghasem (Jan 12, 2020)

New2This said:


> ... haircut...


Is that what that was??
I thought it was an accident! &#129325;


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## k4ever (Oct 12, 2016)

Dang, the pandemic really did a number on this sorry a$$ soul.


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## somedriverguy (Sep 6, 2016)

New2This said:


> I'm getting my first haircut in months tomorrow. Needed an idea for a new hairstyle. Thanks bro.


Ask @OCJarvis for a pic, then get what he's got.


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## OCJarvis (Sep 4, 2017)

It's like a story straight out of the keyboard of Saduber


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## Guido-TheKillerPimp (Jan 4, 2021)

JohnJames8678 said:


> Ok, so last night I got on Lyft and Uber for fun. So I get dressed up, hair looking super wavy, stubble, just pumped out some gym reps and took a few gym mirror selfie's. I'm a tool for this I know :smiles: I'm feeling myself, hair grown out to my shoulders, six pack primed and ready, ultimate @@@@@@ energy. I decided to get on Lyft after my buddy canceled plans on me. Not wanted to go into a bar alone, I the idea of going on Lyft to find a date to the bar. I'm sneaky and remembered my old days how often I'd get asked to come in etc. So I'm like ok that's the plan, pick up a passenger, let them ask you in, just sit there and be charming and sexy. I've been out of the game for awhile so I didn't know if I could score. Boy let me tell you! Spend about an hour and half picking up randoms(No One hits on me!), I'm like wtf is going on, on a Saturday i used to have women go wild when getting in my car, then I realize it's the mask! I need to take of my mask! That dang thing is hiding my face. So I go pick up my next rider mask free and what do you know it's a group of chicks! The cute one walks up to my window looks at me is about to get into the back then switches up to the front, yeah baby we got one! They always give you that "wait this guy is hot as chit" look before getting in the front. They get in and boy the flirting and complements just start rolling, nothing about me not wearing a mask tho. The pictures come out, hey here's my friends picture she'd love you, do you think she's cute(she was fire btw!) she's almost done with law school and is single. Here let me gave you her number! They are getting touchy and worked up as they enquire about my dating life and want scoops on the women. I'll do this occasionally to show them I'm available and I Fk. I always make sure to stay cool and professional, talk in a lower voice and drive with one hand while putting a half smile of my face and holding the other hand up like Matthew McConaughey and the stupid Lincoln commercials. That works magic on em. I'm so lame ;P It's fun watching grown women loose all basic functioning. I'm getting asked about my dating life, one of the women is older and asks if I think she's cute, as the gentleman I am I told her she was STUNNING! She was actually not bad looking, but wanted to make her feel good about herself. She's super happy now and is trying to set me up with her daughter in grad school. We get to the destination they all get out and I ask if I will pose for pictures with them. I couldn't say no. As the cute one walks away I turn and ask "hey, do you wanna hang later?" Ok, someone finally found his balls! She says "come in right now with us" the other women I wasn't interested in went crazy, pulling on my arm like school girls. I had to oblige, I wouldn't want to disappoint. I park my car and had a fun night with these lovely people. Got drinks bought for me and exchanged funny stories. They were convinced I did this with all my Lyft passengers. No, just the special ones :wink: I had that BIG D energy last night. Gave it my all with little miss wants to play hard to get. Obviously I knew she thought I was attractive. I finally got the courage to shoot my shot and walked over to her and told her straight up into her ear, "your the best looking girl in this bar" she turns away and smiles that kind of smile like "dam this guy" she's got one hand over her mouth trying to hide her face she puts it down and while bitting her lip. Gosh she looked so freaking adorable at that moment. Innocent and cheeks red. Can I get your number? I ask, she gives it to me "don't text me, your gonna get me into trouble" I respond "I'm problematic". I left soon after. Now I'm texting this really cute woman I met last night on Lyft who has a boyfriend. What should I do? Peace and love ☮ ❤


Ask the rest of them if they're interested in some "side work" &#128521; and give them my number &#128526;


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## kdyrpr (Apr 23, 2016)

Closers! I want closers! You didn't close it! Phone number?


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## oishiin driving (Feb 24, 2020)

So all these invites from pax were serious?
I thought they were just being kind.

One time a couple were going to strip club. The guy asked me to go with them, he’ll pay me $300 to just come in.

Eww..


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## ANThonyBoreDaneCook (Oct 7, 2019)

oishiin driving said:


> come in


Come in what?


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## oishiin driving (Feb 24, 2020)

ANThonyBoreDaneCook said:


> Come in what?


lol, come inside


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## RobLinn (Aug 10, 2019)

LMAO

Used to read this type of story in the Penthouse letters in the magazines

Didn’t buy those stores then & don’t buy them today

Don’t get me wrong

Adventures do happen

But not as quick as this story


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## Another Uber Driver (May 27, 2015)

RobLinn said:


> Used to read this type of story in the Penthouse letters in the magazines


A forum of this nature is not without its chest pounders. We have several that still post as well as a few from whom we have not heard in some time.


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## Diamondraider (Mar 13, 2017)

KevinJohnson said:


> Done this before.
> If she has a boyfriend you meet her on a Monday afternoon like 12pm. You get take out and eat at your place.
> Causes less suspicion.


Don't listen to him. His mom doesn't allow guests after 9 PM.



oishiin driving said:


> lol, come inside


You should get to know somebody first. until then always pull out


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## SleelWheels (Jun 25, 2019)

Think much of yourself?


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## deplorable1 (Apr 14, 2018)

JohnJames8678 said:


> Ok, so last night I got on Lyft and Uber for fun. So I get dressed up, hair looking super wavy, stubble, just pumped out some gym reps and took a few gym mirror selfie's. I'm a tool for this I know :smiles: I'm feeling myself, hair grown out to my shoulders, six pack primed and ready, ultimate @@@@@@ energy. I decided to get on Lyft after my buddy canceled plans on me. Not wanted to go into a bar alone, I the idea of going on Lyft to find a date to the bar. I'm sneaky and remembered my old days how often I'd get asked to come in etc. So I'm like ok that's the plan, pick up a passenger, let them ask you in, just sit there and be charming and sexy. I've been out of the game for awhile so I didn't know if I could score. Boy let me tell you! Spend about an hour and half picking up randoms(No One hits on me!), I'm like wtf is going on, on a Saturday i used to have women go wild when getting in my car, then I realize it's the mask! I need to take of my mask! That dang thing is hiding my face. So I go pick up my next rider mask free and what do you know it's a group of chicks! The cute one walks up to my window looks at me is about to get into the back then switches up to the front, yeah baby we got one! They always give you that "wait this guy is hot as chit" look before getting in the front. They get in and boy the flirting and complements just start rolling, nothing about me not wearing a mask tho. The pictures come out, hey here's my friends picture she'd love you, do you think she's cute(she was fire btw!) she's almost done with law school and is single. Here let me gave you her number! They are getting touchy and worked up as they enquire about my dating life and want scoops on the women. I'll do this occasionally to show them I'm available and I Fk. I always make sure to stay cool and professional, talk in a lower voice and drive with one hand while putting a half smile of my face and holding the other hand up like Matthew McConaughey and the stupid Lincoln commercials. That works magic on em. I'm so lame ;P It's fun watching grown women loose all basic functioning. I'm getting asked about my dating life, one of the women is older and asks if I think she's cute, as the gentleman I am I told her she was STUNNING! She was actually not bad looking, but wanted to make her feel good about herself. She's super happy now and is trying to set me up with her daughter in grad school. We get to the destination they all get out and I ask if I will pose for pictures with them. I couldn't say no. As the cute one walks away I turn and ask "hey, do you wanna hang later?" Ok, someone finally found his balls! She says "come in right now with us" the other women I wasn't interested in went crazy, pulling on my arm like school girls. I had to oblige, I wouldn't want to disappoint. I park my car and had a fun night with these lovely people. Got drinks bought for me and exchanged funny stories. They were convinced I did this with all my Lyft passengers. No, just the special ones :wink: I had that BIG D energy last night. Gave it my all with little miss wants to play hard to get. Obviously I knew she thought I was attractive. I finally got the courage to shoot my shot and walked over to her and told her straight up into her ear, "your the best looking girl in this bar" she turns away and smiles that kind of smile like "dam this guy" she's got one hand over her mouth trying to hide her face she puts it down and while bitting her lip. Gosh she looked so freaking adorable at that moment. Innocent and cheeks red. Can I get your number? I ask, she gives it to me "don't text me, your gonna get me into trouble" I respond "I'm problematic". I left soon after. Now I'm texting this really cute woman I met last night on Lyft who has a boyfriend. What should I do? Peace and love ☮ ❤


I'm no longer pro-life


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## oishiin driving (Feb 24, 2020)

deplorable1 said:


> I'm no longer pro-life


neither am i, it's too messy to begin with and then unintended consequences ..


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## ANThonyBoreDaneCook (Oct 7, 2019)

deplorable1 said:


> I'm no longer pro-life


That thing isn't life
It was incubated in a Starbucks and hatched in the men's khaki pant section of an Abercrombie & Fitch store


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## Sandhills (Feb 9, 2018)

Gay guy who needs to feel attractive...yada yada🤪


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## SpinalCabbage (Feb 5, 2020)

For someone reason this video came to mind...


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## Mash Ghasem (Jan 12, 2020)

Sandhills said:


> Gay guy who needs to feel attractive...yada yada🤪


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