# Let's talk about sex - (It's a slow night on planet UBER)



## Sydney Uber (Apr 15, 2014)

Ok folks the moderator will be watching this closely. Being Mormon and a reformed alcoholic he ain't much into fun these days - so keep it as clean and as funny as you can!

Anything you'd like to express about horizontal Olympics, how UBERing has affected or added to your lovelife.


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## Backdash (Jan 28, 2015)

sad....


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## Sydney Uber (Apr 15, 2014)

Backdash said:


> sad....


Yes, i gotta admit its a stretch for some entertainment.

But you shouldn't be talking with a handle like "Backdash"!


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## Nick tardy (May 13, 2015)

What is sęx?


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## Fuzzyelvis (Dec 7, 2014)

Sydney Uber said:


> Ok folks the moderator will be watching this closely. Being Mormon and a reformed alcoholic he ain't much into fun these days - so keep it as clean and as funny as you can!
> 
> Anything you'd like to express about horizontal Olympics, how UBERing has affected or added to your lovelife.


I believe one driver a month or two ago mentioned with no pings he had more time to masturbate. So there is an inverse relationship between how busy Uber is and time to masturbate?


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## Nick tardy (May 13, 2015)

Fuzzyelvis said:


> I believe one driver a month or two ago mentioned with no pings he had more time to masturbate. So there is an inverse relationship between how busy Uber is and time to masturbate?


There's always time to masturbate if you're fast enough


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## Sydney Uber (Apr 15, 2014)

Fuzzyelvis said:


> I believe one driver a month or two ago mentioned with no pings he had more time to masturbate. So there is an inverse relationship between how busy Uber is and time to masturbate?


Do you think UBER would pay the cleaning fees if photos were sent in? If they kept him busier there wouldn't have been such a mess!


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## Backdash (Jan 28, 2015)

Sydney Uber said:


> But you shouldn't be talking with a handle like "Backdash"!


Lol so Backdash is a sad handle or that it refers to something sexual?


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## Sydney Uber (Apr 15, 2014)

Backdash said:


> Lol so Backdash is a sad handle or that it refers to something sexual?


You tell me how your mind was thinking when you thought it up.

So how's UBER been affecting your love life? More /Less. Lost interest. Too tired. Can't cope with the summer outfits some female riders present with. (It's been a while since I've been to confession- yes those skimpy outfits get me)


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## Desert Driver (Nov 9, 2014)

Backdash said:


> Lol so Backdash is a sad handle or that it refers to something sexual?


It appears Backdash may have had her sense of humor surgically removed at some point.


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## Fuzzyelvis (Dec 7, 2014)

Sydney Uber said:


> Do you think UBER would pay the cleaning fees if photos were sent in? If they kept him busier there wouldn't have been such a mess!


Good point. We also wouldn't have to sit around drinking coffee and watching porn with the result that we have to find a bathroom. That has resulted in endless discussions about peeing in cups and possible spillage. More mess.


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## DrJeecheroo (Feb 12, 2015)

Nick tardy said:


> What is sęx?


It's an activity that people do that creates more people. But that's not important right now.


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## DrJeecheroo (Feb 12, 2015)

Backdash said:


> sad....


Why are you so sad backdash? If you want to type about it, were here to help. How do you feel about that?


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## ARIV005 (Mar 4, 2015)

Sydney Uber said:


> You tell me how your mind was thinking when you thought it up.
> 
> So how's UBER been affecting your love life? More /Less. Lost interest. Too tired. Can't cope with the summer outfits some female riders present with. (It's been a while since I've been to confession- yes those skimpy outfits get me)


I agree... Now that summer is here.... The daisy Dukes and cute toes got my tail wagging.


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## BaitNSwitch (May 12, 2015)

Travis wants us to have more sex so we can create more mindless drones for his Uber army.


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## DrJeecheroo (Feb 12, 2015)

Even Travis says we can get more "tail" if driving uber. Or wait did he say that just for himself? Hmm.


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## DrJeecheroo (Feb 12, 2015)

Fuzzyelvis said:


> Good point. We also wouldn't have to sit around drinking coffee and watching porn with the result that we have to find a bathroom. That has resulted in endless discussions about peeing in cups and possible spillage. More mess.


Yeah, a good title would be "Debbie does Uber".


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## Sydney Uber (Apr 15, 2014)

DrJeecheroo said:


> Even Travis says we can get more "tail" if driving uber. Or wait did he say that just for himself? Hmm.


Yeah I vaguely remember a pitch like that by Travis.

Sure there's lots of temptation, but unless I get handed a business card from a smiling Milf stating she's a registered Nymphomanic and whatever happens is simply part of her health regime, then methinks it's unlikely.


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## DrJeecheroo (Feb 12, 2015)

That would put a smile on my face.


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## UberRidiculous (May 19, 2015)

Who needs sex when we have UberPeople Land! I haven't had this much fun in years. LOL


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## DrJeecheroo (Feb 12, 2015)

Isn't this the kind of topic that might excite the mods to come swooping down and making some of us disappear?


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## UberRidiculous (May 19, 2015)

DrJeecheroo said:


> Isn't this the kind of topic that might excite the mods to come swooping down and making some of us disappear?


I think this is the kind of topic that makes even the mods click on 'watch thread'. But nothin' to watch here. Hahaha


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## DrJeecheroo (Feb 12, 2015)

UberRidiculous said:


> I think this is the kind of topic that makes even the mods click on 'watch thread'. But nothin' to watch here. Hahaha


Yes may a good point there. After all they probably have to view 1000's of posts, and can get boring. So I'm certain that (though they'll never admit it) get a few chuckles out of some of these posts. That probably explains why threads that Uberjax started never got locked.


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## djino (Mar 15, 2015)

Any of y'all watch porn on the Tablet in between pings?


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## Sydney Uber (Apr 15, 2014)

ARIV005 said:


> I agree... Now that summer is here.... The daisy Dukes and cute toes got my tail wagging.


I think I need a translation here. What is a Daisy Duke? And is a "cute toe" the same as a "Camel Toe"?


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## Sydney Uber (Apr 15, 2014)

DrJeecheroo said:


> Yes may a good point there. After all they probably have to view 1000's of posts, and can get boring. So I'm certain that (though they'll never admit it) get a few chuckles out of some of these posts. That probably explains why threads that Uberjax started never got locked.


UberJax! He WAS UBER's poster boy, but they f$&k?d him! Sort of fits with this thread! Hehehe


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## Sydney Uber (Apr 15, 2014)

djino said:


> Any of y'all watch porn on the Tablet in between pings?


No of course not! I watch C-Span and keep informed.

There is a site called *******.com when I need to be educated.!


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## Lidman (Nov 13, 2014)

wow, I didn't know that have C span in Australia, Do they televise hockey games there?


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## Sydney Uber (Apr 15, 2014)

DrJeecheroo said:


> Isn't this the kind of topic that might excite the mods to come swooping down and making some of us disappear?


I gotta ask Dr J, because Germans have been known to get up to some crazy shit, (pun intended). Does Mrs J ask you keep your helmet on when you both go Jiggy Jiggy?


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## Sydney Uber (Apr 15, 2014)

Lidman said:


> wow, I didn't know that have C span in Australia, Do they televise hockey games there?


Ice Hockey? Authorised violence?


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## Lidman (Nov 13, 2014)

Sydney Uber said:


> Ice Hockey? Authorised violence?


More like the male version of the "icecapades"


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## Choochie (Jan 4, 2015)

Hey fellas and ladies, did you know they are coming out, ha ha, with a women's version of Vi? Well it's true.


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## Choochie (Jan 4, 2015)

It banned me from using the word - said here it was banned.


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## Sydney Uber (Apr 15, 2014)

Choochie said:


> It banned me from using the word - said here it was banned.


I have no idea what you're talking about. Spell the banned word backwards


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## Lidman (Nov 13, 2014)

does it rhyme with that city up near the canadien border called Niagara Falls.


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## Sydney Uber (Apr 15, 2014)

Lidman said:


> More like the male version of the "icecapades"


I like watching Amazonian women competing in Roller Derby.

I have been trying to increase patronage to the Netball competition here. I've come up with a design of a Netball court that has a Perspex court floor. Comfortable reclined seating below the court for dirty old men to enjoy!


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## Lidman (Nov 13, 2014)

Reminds me of a part in Monte Pythons meaning of life, where the guy has to face excecution but he gets to chose how, by being chased off a cliff by some topless rollergirls


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## ReviTULize (Sep 29, 2014)

DrJeecheroo said:


> Yeah, a good title would be "Debbie does Uber".


..."it's surging everywhere!"


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## Choochie (Jan 4, 2015)

Sydney Uber said:


> I have no idea what you're talking about. Spell the banned word backwards


No imagination - try putting it in a post and see what happens - you can say shit, **** and other 4 letter words but no Via


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## Choochie (Jan 4, 2015)

Lidman said:


> does it rhyme with that city up near the canadien border called Niagara Falls.


You win the big banana for playing the word game. Maybe you should try your luck on those tv games like millionaire. Then you could give up your driving and win some real money!


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## DrJeecheroo (Feb 12, 2015)

Choochie said:


> No imagination - try putting it in a post and see what happens - you can say shit, **** and other 4 letter words but no Via


I got it!! Viaduct!!!


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## DrJeecheroo (Feb 12, 2015)

Choochie said:


> You win the big banana for playing the word game. Maybe you should try your luck on those tv games like millionaire. Then you could give up your driving and win some real money!


So you were trying to type Niagara. Maybe the censors are much more sensitive on your computer.


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## ARIV005 (Mar 4, 2015)

Sydney Uber said:


> I think I need a translation here. What is a Daisy Duke? And is a "cute toe" the same as a "Camel Toe"?


For the meaning of Daisy Dukes, please refer to pic attached. It's the piece of cloth on the lower end... And by cute toes... I mean feet. Yes sir, I do have a foot fetish and my avatar shows my face when I see them. Haha! The reference camel toe is on another thread.


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## ARIV005 (Mar 4, 2015)

Sydney Uber said:


> No of course not! I watch C-Span and keep informed.
> 
> There is a site called *******.com when I need to be educated.!


Open Twitter. You'd be amazed!


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## ARIV005 (Mar 4, 2015)

Sydney Uber said:


> I have no idea what you're talking about. Spell the banned word backwards


via-gra


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## Lidman (Nov 13, 2014)

Choochie said:


> You win the big banana for playing the word game. Maybe you should try your luck on those tv games like millionaire. Then you could give up your driving and win some real money!


Wow I won a big banana. Maybe I can exchange it for cash.


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## ARIV005 (Mar 4, 2015)

Lidman said:


> Wow I won a big banana. Maybe I can exchange it for cash.


Add some Guyanese hot sauce to the banana & Shove it up Travis' non trustworthy ass!!! You'll make thousands from the other drivers...


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## DougB (Apr 8, 2015)

Had a young lady (25-30) PAX a couple weeks ago on a Friday night after drinks with friends. Not loaded by any means but in a very good mood. Making conversation I asked if she had any fun plans for the weekend. She said the following day she would be fulfilling a fantasy and would be the center of attention for a group of guys. Asked me if I thought that she was bad.

I said as long as you are doing what you want and not being forced in anyway I hope all of your fantasies are fulfilled.

She just smiled. No I was not invited.


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## Choochie (Jan 4, 2015)

DrJeecheroo said:


> I got it!! Viaduct!!!


You win the little banana


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## Choochie (Jan 4, 2015)

ARIV005 said:


> via-gra


Tricky dicky


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## Choochie (Jan 4, 2015)

So I knew about the new women's via-gra cause I drove the psychologist consultant to the airport the other night. He was doing the psychological tests for the pilots over in Abu dhabi to screen out those dastardly pilots in that area. But first he had the meeting in Washington for the new via-gra. I asked if that was developed for the older women and he said no the younger ones. He said they get very depressed due to lack of desire. The FDA should be approving that soon. Really? What's up with the young ladies, fellas? I didn't know that was a big problem. Get your engines revved up and ready for the new Fiagra. They're going to be screwing their brains out! 
Anyway that consultant was a cheap, fat bastard! His wife gave him a piece of pie for the road and good thing he didn't try to eat it in my car!


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## Sydney Uber (Apr 15, 2014)

Choochie said:


> Hey fellas and ladies, did you know they are coming out, ha ha, with a women's version of Vi? Well it's true.


I actually used to look after Pfizer executives in the mid 90s. The team I knew were given Via-gra to "test" and report. The Female executives were also advised to try Vi. They experienced the same sort of increased blood flow in the Clitoris as men did in their Penis. Very enjoyable survey sessions followed!


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## Sydney Uber (Apr 15, 2014)

ARIV005 said:


> For the meaning of Daisy Dukes, please refer to pic attached. It's the piece of cloth on the lower end... And by cute toes... I mean feet. Yes sir, I do have a foot fetish and my avatar shows my face when I see them. Haha! The reference camel toe is on another thread.
> View attachment 8058


Where has society come to! When we can't even afford the fabric to clothe our women-folk!!


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## ARIV005 (Mar 4, 2015)

Sydney Uber said:


> Where has society come to! When we can't even afford the fabric to clothe our women-folk!!


I think we're still in a recession... And if not, I'm sure Uber will put us back in one.


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## Choochie (Jan 4, 2015)

Sydney Uber said:


> I actually used to look after Pfizer executives in the mid 90s. The team I knew were given Via-gra to "test" and report. The Female executives were also advised to try Vi. They experienced the same sort of increased blood flow in the Clitoris as men did in their Penis. Very enjoyable survey sessions followed!


That must have been a lively group.
They have a pill for everything - were just a world of pill-poppers.


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## ARIV005 (Mar 4, 2015)

Choochie said:


> That must have been a lively group.
> They have a pill for everything - were just a world of pill-poppers.


Pill poppers are just in the states... Everywhere else is coke and weed.


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## Lidman (Nov 13, 2014)

there's no pillpoppers in austrailia or brazil


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## Pinky & The Brain (Apr 8, 2015)

ARIV005 said:


> For the meaning of Daisy Dukes, please refer to pic attached. It's the piece of cloth on the lower end... And by cute toes... I mean feet. Yes sir, I do have a foot fetish and my avatar shows my face when I see them. Haha! The reference camel toe is on another thread.
> View attachment 8058


LOL, I see ARIV005 has answered your question... Daisy Dukes are basically short shorts that are so short that the ass hangs out, a little something like this: https://www.google.com/search?q=dai...gIVzS-ICh2eugqd#tbm=isch&q=daisy+duke+costume

And when it comes to cute toes, please DON'T refer em to camel toes... two TOTALLY different things. ARIV005 simply has a foot fetish, which is actually very common/standard in the skin/sex/porn industry. Basically, he likes the toes on a female's foot, like this (try not to orgasm too hard now, ARIV005 =] ) : https://www.google.com/search?q=dai...44CizNySxgIVzS-ICh2eugqd#tbm=isch&q=cute+toes


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## RockinEZ (Apr 29, 2015)

Has anyone been asked in? 

I have had it happen a few times. I have no intention of seeing my face in the papers the next day. 

I did have one woman offer me $60 to talk to her a half hour. Too strange. 
There are some lonely folks out there, and some of them take Uber.


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## Pinky & The Brain (Apr 8, 2015)

RockinEZ said:


> Has anyone been asked in?
> 
> I have had it happen a few times. I have no intention of seeing my face in the papers the next day.
> 
> ...


Hit me up and let me know! I'd be more than happy to chat with someone for 30 minutes for $60! Shoot! As a girl, I can TALK!!!! =]


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## ARIV005 (Mar 4, 2015)

Pinky & The Brain said:


> LOL, I see ARIV005 has answered your question... Daisy Dukes are basically short shorts that are so short that the ass hangs out, a little something like this: https://www.google.com/search?q=dai...gIVzS-ICh2eugqd#tbm=isch&q=daisy+duke+costume
> 
> And when it comes to cute toes, please DON'T refer em to camel toes... two TOTALLY different things. ARIV005 simply has a foot fetish, which is actually very common/standard in the skin/sex/porn industry. Basically, he likes the toes on a female's foot, like this (try not to orgasm too hard now, ARIV005 =] ) : https://www.google.com/search?q=dai...44CizNySxgIVzS-ICh2eugqd#tbm=isch&q=cute+toes


Best for back scratching or climbing a mountain.... Lol


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## Sydney Uber (Apr 15, 2014)

RockinEZ said:


> Has anyone been asked in?
> 
> I have had it happen a few times. I have no intention of seeing my face in the papers the next day.
> 
> ...


I would've said yes, on the condition it was on neutral ground like a cafe or fast food joint, and at the end of the session she ping another driver.

If she doesn't agree to that, then you know she just wants to find a way to jump on your bone.

Its good for the ego though right?


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## Pinky & The Brain (Apr 8, 2015)

ARIV005 said:


> Best for back scratching or climbing a mountain.... Lol


I'm, uh, IMPRESSED... I've never seen toe nails that long before... makes me wonder how she walks.... yikes!


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## Sydney Uber (Apr 15, 2014)

Winter here in the land of Oz has certainly put a stop on some of the more adventurous outfits riders have been known to wear. What's it like in the US at the moment?

Anyone have been subjected to a rider wearing so very very little clothes that it becomes a health issue for them to sit in your car for others to use afterwards?


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## Desert Driver (Nov 9, 2014)

Sydney Uber said:


> Winter here in the land of Oz has certainly put a stop on some of the more adventurous outfits riders have been known to wear. What's it like in the US at the moment?
> 
> Anyone have been subjected to a rider wearing so very very little clothes that it becomes a health issue for them to sit in your car for others to use afterwards?


This past spring I had a stripper get completely naked in my backseat as she was changing clothes for her next appearance at a frat house. That was pretty fun.


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## SD Momo (Feb 8, 2016)

DougB said:


> Had a young lady (25-30) PAX a couple weeks ago on a Friday night after drinks with friends. Not loaded by any means but in a very good mood. Making conversation I asked if she had any fun plans for the weekend. She said the following day she would be fulfilling a fantasy and would be the center of attention for a group of guys. Asked me if I thought that she was bad.
> 
> I said as long as you are doing what you want and not being forced in anyway I hope all of your fantasies are fulfilled.
> 
> She just smiled. No I was not invited.


Now that you mention your ride; about a year ago I was requested around 1:00am on a weekend. After waiting about a minute, the Uber account holder a 23-28 years old brunette approach the car and asked if she could seat on the front. She was not only attractive, but was nice and friendly. She started small talk while we waited for some guys. After 1-3 minutes these 3 guys arrived. I was playing Cypress Hill and the guys started small talk about the music.

I was listening to one of the guys in the back about the band, when suddenly I heard the girl's voice, asking the guys, that "_her hair was off limits. It was fine anywhere else, just not on her hair_." They were laughing and telling how demanding she was.

A few minutes before the ride ended, one guy checked his pocket and pull out a $5, and requested money from the other guys to tip me. He apologize for having only the $5. One of the other guys added 7 or 8 single dollars to the tip.

They were dropped at another residence. I just wish them a good time, of course no more words.


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## shiftydrake (Dec 12, 2015)

Sydney Uber said:


> I think I need a translation here. What is a Daisy Duke? And is a "cute toe" the same as a "Camel Toe"?


Translation for the Aussies in the bunch......Daisy Dukes......back in the 80's was a tv show called Dukes of Hazzard...the female on the show was named Daisy...she ALWAYS wore very short cutoff blue jean shorts that hugged everything very close....them short blue jean shorts got nicknamed " Daisy Dukes" .......... Cute toes......is a foot reference


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