# Naked man swings hatchet after being mistaken for Uber driver



## KevinH (Jul 13, 2014)

http://www.stuff.co.nz/world/americ...-hatchet-after-being-mistaken-for-Uber-driver











US police arrested a man who swung a hatchet during an argument after he was mistaken for an Uber driver.

At about 2.20am on Sunday (local time), a US Park Police officer responded to a street in Arlington, Virginia, for a report of a vehicle driving erratically and nearly striking pedestrians, the Arlington County Police Department said in a statement.

Before police arrived, the vehicle entered a parking lot where three individuals approached it, mistakenly thinking it was their Uber ride, the statement said.

This led to a verbal argument with the driver, Michael Monroe, 64, of Gainesville, Virginia, who was naked.

Monroe retrieved a hatchet from the back seat of the vehicle and started swinging it, according to the statement.

There were no injuries, and the three individuals were able to wrestle the hatchet away from Monroe, the statement said. Monroe attempted to flee the scene before Park Police initiated a traffic stop, and Arlington County police attempted a sobriety test, according to the statement.

Monroe, who refused the test, was arrested and charged with DUI, refusal and disorderly conduct, police said.

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## SEAL Team 5 (Dec 19, 2015)

KevinH said:


> http://www.stuff.co.nz/world/americ...-hatchet-after-being-mistaken-for-Uber-driver
> 
> 
> 
> ...


A naked drunk 64 year old male swinging a hatchet? Yikes!!! Hopefully that was the only thing swinging. Now that gives real meaning to the Uber X rated platform.


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## hbenaid404 (Mar 15, 2016)

People just leave their cars unlocked while driving naked?!


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## D Town (Apr 8, 2015)

hbenaid404 said:


> People just leave their cars unlocked while driving naked?!


I suppose you always lock your doors when you drive naked.


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## hbenaid404 (Mar 15, 2016)

D Town said:


> I suppose you always lock your doors when you drive naked.


I would be upset if pax enters my vehicle while pissing in my empty Gatorade bottle.


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## Jinxstone (Feb 19, 2016)

If he was driving erratically and almost running people down I can see how the passengers might think he was an Uber driver. It's his own fault.


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## UTX1 (Dec 7, 2015)

Jinxstone said:


> If he was driving erratically and almost running people down I can see how the passengers might think he was an Uber driver. It's his own fault.


What's bad about it is that it's likely the FIRST thing they thought.
Not, "..what's wrong with that guy ? Is he drunk ?" 
or " OMG ! Did you see that guy ? Is he on a rampage ?"
It was "...hmmmmpf, must be an Uber Driver, lol"

Damn ! we gotta get some better PR spinmeisters on the campaign. 
Que the Uber Puppies ! Roll tape. in three...two...one...ACTION !


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## uberdriverfornow (Jan 10, 2016)

There is obviously something wrong with this story.


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## D Town (Apr 8, 2015)

uberdriverfornow said:


> There is obviously something wrong with this story.


THAT is the understatement of the decade, lol.


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## MikesUber (Oct 23, 2015)

KevinH said:


> the three individuals were able to wrestle the hatchet away from Monroe


 Okay soo who else is going to voluntarily wrestle a naked 64 year old man, let alone one with a HATCHET? My instinct would be to oh I don't know, RUN?

It's bad enough when they assault you in the gym locker room walking around for 20 minutes and spread-eagling all over the place lol nasty


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## UTX1 (Dec 7, 2015)

MikesUber said:


> Okay soo who else is going to voluntarily wrestle a naked 64 year old man,
> let alone one with a HATCHET? My instinct would be to oh I don't know, RUN?


Although....
Wrestling a 29 year old naked woman (even with a hatchet) might be worth the challenge.
Does anyone have a kink...I mean, a link to sign up for this instead ?


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## D Town (Apr 8, 2015)

MikesUber said:


> Okay soo who else is going to voluntarily wrestle a naked 64 year old man, let alone one with a HATCHET? My instinct would be to oh I don't know, RUN?
> 
> It's bad enough when they assault you in the gym locker room walking about for 20 minutes and spread-eagling all over the place lol nasty


This is a fully legitimate question. Why the blazes did they stick around for ANY length of time arguing for a ride with an old naked dude who was likely high on something? Why did they feel the need to WRESTLE said naked old dude? And most importantly, were mental health exams ordered for THEM as well?



UTX1 said:


> Although....
> Wrestling a 29 year old naked woman (even with a hatchet) might be worth the challenge.
> Does anyone have a kink...I mean, a link to sign up for this instead ?


Over rated, IMO. Although it was never a hatchet just a knife once, broken bottles, high heels, and a stick once...I can't speak for anyone else and PERHAPS that just is your thing but screeching, flailing, trying to do you bodily harm women - naked and attractive or not - don't make me think of sex. They make me think of involuntary vasectomies...


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## TwoFiddyMile (Mar 13, 2015)

D Town said:


> This is a fully legitimate question. Why the blazes did they stick around for ANY length of time arguing for a ride with an old naked dude who was likely high on something? Why did they feel the need to WRESTLE said naked old dude? And most importantly, were mental health exams ordered for THEM as well?
> 
> Over rated, IMO. Although it was never a hatchet just a knife once, broken bottles, high heels, and a stick once...I can't speak for anyone else and PERHAPS that just is your thing but screeching, flailing, trying to do you bodily harm women - naked and attractive or not - don't make me think of sex. They make me think of involuntary vasectomies...


Because these PAX win this month's Darwin award!


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## hanging in there (Oct 1, 2014)

D Town said:


> This is a fully legitimate question. Why the blazes did they stick around for ANY length of time arguing for a ride with an old naked dude who was likely high on something? Why did they feel the need to WRESTLE said naked old dude? And most importantly, were mental health exams ordered for THEM as well?


This story reminds me of the time when I called my pax to try and locate them, it turned out they were in a gas station parking lot instead of at the bar location next door where they were supposed to be. When I arrived they were in full knock-down drag-out fight mode with some other guy. The other guy turned out to be just some random guy sitting in his car when my pax came up to him and tried getting in his car, thinking it was their Uber (me). Guy in car just sees 3 drunk guys piling into his car and all hell broke loose.


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## UTX1 (Dec 7, 2015)

D Town said:


> Over rated, IMO. Although it was never a hatchet just a knife once, broken bottles, high heels, and a stick once...
> I can't speak for anyone else and PERHAPS that just is your thing but screeching, flailing, trying to do you bodily harm women -
> naked and attractive or not - don't make me think of sex. They make me think of involuntary vasectomies...


I know...and she's so mean...and she's so bad...but I think she loves me anyway.
ooooh, what a sexy ho ! If I could rope n' ride, I'd hog tie the bitsh and take 'er home to momma.


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## hanging in there (Oct 1, 2014)

"I know...and she's so mean...and she's so bad...but I think she loves me anyway.
ooooh, what a sexy ho ! If I could rope n' ride, I'd hog tie the bitsh and take 'er home to momma."

ummm, ok. I think I'll go now and leave you alone to have your "sexy time"...


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## UTX1 (Dec 7, 2015)

hanging in there said:


> ummm, ok. I think I'll go now and leave you alone to have your "sexy time"...


Before you go, could take a picture us together? In case I have to give a description later,
I won't remember what she even looks like by this time tomorrow. Photo might help....


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## hanging in there (Oct 1, 2014)

UTX1 said:


> Before you go, could take a picture us together? In case I have to give a description later,
> I won't remember what she even looks like by this time tomorrow. Photo might help....


Before or during your "sexy time"?


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## UTX1 (Dec 7, 2015)

hanging in there said:


> Before or during your "sexy time"?


Well....right now if you could.....while she's still naked and angry.
Once she calms down, she'll probably put her clothes back on
and then what's the point ? I got like 30% battery left on this...
just a couple pics and then good to go. Thanks. 

 <----- look at her, she's so mean and angry. 
what a total piece of ass. maybe she has a sister ?


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## Fuzzyelvis (Dec 7, 2014)

hbenaid404 said:


> People just leave their cars unlocked while driving naked?!


Only if they're carrying a hatchet. Or they're an Uber driver.

Hence the confusion.

Goes to show these pax will get in any car with any driver if they're expecting an Uber.


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## Fuzzyelvis (Dec 7, 2014)

hanging in there said:


> This story reminds me of the time when I called my pax to try and locate them, it turned out they were in a gas station parking lot instead of at the bar location next door where they were supposed to be. When I arrived they were in full knock-down drag-out fight mode with some other guy. The other guy turned out to be just some random guy sitting in his car when my pax came up to him and tried getting in his car, thinking it was their Uber (me). Guy in car just sees 3 drunk guys piling into his car and all hell broke loose.


I'm a blonde, blue eyed female. I had some pax one night try to get in my car and when I rolled down the window and asked their name I had to tell them I wasn't their driver.

One said, "I wondered why you weren't a black guy in a Honda Accord like the app says you are. But you have a sign."

This not long past 2am. Uber cars probably everywhere. Most with trade dress. But he just trys to get in the first one he sees and is confused as to how it's the wrong car and I'm the wrong race and sex.

How serial killers aren't all over this sh** I don't know.

You don't even need the app. Just put Google maps up and tell them the app is being slow telling you the destination.


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## Bart McCoy (Nov 4, 2014)

Yeah this happened in my market.

This shouldn't even be on the site because its not Uber related, although folks will still blame Uber for this incident smh

Only people you can blame are the dummies: why are you running to a car that obviously does not match the plates given to you in your app? Make they need a body part chopped off so they can learn to look for their car properly. Let that man run naked in peace....

Also, trying to figure out why Park police responded. Surely that's not their jurisdiction. A smart lawyer may bring that up


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## TwoFiddyMile (Mar 13, 2015)

Bart McCoy said:


> Yeah this happened in my market.
> 
> This shouldn't even be on the site because its not Uber related, although folks will still blame Uber for this incident smh
> 
> ...


Agreed, its not an Uber issue at all.
It's a "culture of Uber" issue.
The Uber phenomenon is creating a class of pax so stupid they randomly jump in strange cars without verification.
As you might say, SMH×1000.


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## UTX1 (Dec 7, 2015)

Times 1000 ? That's a lot of head shaking ! Are you sure ?
Last I saw that much I remember it was here:

(Pre-uber Phenomenon)


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## Bart McCoy (Nov 4, 2014)

UTX1 said:


> Times 1000 ? That's a lot of head shaking ! Are you sure ?
> Last I saw that much I remember it was here:
> 
> (Pre-uber Phenomenon)


Night at the Roxbury!!! extremely funny movie


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## UTX1 (Dec 7, 2015)

Bart McCoy said:


> Night at the Roxbury!!! extremely funny movie


very funny and plenty of SMH


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## Fuzzyelvis (Dec 7, 2014)

Bart McCoy said:


> Yeah this happened in my market.
> 
> This shouldn't even be on the site because its not Uber related, although folks will still blame Uber for this incident smh
> 
> ...


If someone is running around trying to chop people up with a hatchet, any police that are close could certainly get involved. Even if they're off duty. I don't think jurisdiction is an issue at that point. It's not like someone rolled a stop sign. It could be a murder in the making.


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## A Morgan (Apr 4, 2016)

D Town said:


> This is a fully legitimate question. Why the blazes did they stick around for ANY length of time arguing for a ride with an old naked dude who was likely high on something? ...


$5 cancellation fee.


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## A Morgan (Apr 4, 2016)

TwoFiddyMile said:


> Agreed, its not an Uber issue at all.
> It's a "culture of Uber" issue.
> The Uber phenomenon is creating a class of pax so stupid they randomly jump in strange cars without verification.
> As you might say, SMH×1000.


I'm an old man and girls chase me down to jump in my car; Uber on!


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## Bart McCoy (Nov 4, 2014)

D Town said:


> This is a fully legitimate question. Why the blazes did they stick around for ANY length of time arguing for a ride with an old naked dude who was likely high on something? Why did they feel the need to WRESTLE said naked old dude? And most importantly, were mental health exams ordered for THEM as well?.


yeah, especially since the pax were clearly the ones in the wrong for contact him/his car in the first place. Old dude was riding around nake bothering nobody until those pesky pax pested him


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## Fireguy50 (Nov 23, 2015)

uberdriverfornow said:


> There is obviously something wrong with this story.


No, it's the perfect idiocy for all participants!


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## groovyguru (Mar 9, 2015)

I'd be pretty pissed if someone thought I was an uBer driver. But I wouldn't lose my shorts over it.


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## Old Rocker (Aug 20, 2015)

Fuzzyelvis said:


> If someone is running around trying to chop people up with a hatchet, any police that are close could certainly get involved. Even if they're off duty. I don't think jurisdiction is an issue at that point. It's not like someone rolled a stop sign. It could be a murder in the making.


Yep, this accidental incident may have inadvertently saved someone's life.


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## Bart McCoy (Nov 4, 2014)

Fuzzyelvis said:


> If someone is running around trying to chop people up with a hatchet, any police that are close could certainly get involved. Even if they're off duty. I don't think jurisdiction is an issue at that point. It's not like someone rolled a stop sign. It could be a murder in the making.


Yeah maybe, if the officer witnessed this,but he didnt. He pulled the guy over later for driving erratically. Something you normally need jurisdiction to do. I pulled up the map and dont see anything owned by the dept of the Interior for him to even be in that location,def not S Eads street



Old Rocker said:


> Yep, this accidental incident may have inadvertently saved someone's life.


Maybe, maybe not. If these dumb stupid pax didnt try to hijack his car, we probably would have never known he was naked or had a "hatchet".


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## Fuzzyelvis (Dec 7, 2014)

Bart McCoy said:


> Yeah maybe, if the officer witnessed this,but he didnt. He pulled the guy over later for driving erratically. Something you normally need jurisdiction to do. I pulled up the map and dont see anything owned by the dept of the Interior for him to even be in that location,def not S Eads street
> 
> Maybe, maybe not. If these dumb stupid pax didnt try to hijack his car, we probably would have never known he was naked or had a "hatchet".


Well it depends HOW erratic his driving was. Maybe it was so bad as to be extremely dangerous. Maybe he almost just hit a kid. Who knows?


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## TwoFiddyMile (Mar 13, 2015)

Driving naked with a machete- the new show on Tru TV.


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## Old Rocker (Aug 20, 2015)

Fuzzyelvis said:


> Well it depends HOW erratic his driving was. Maybe it was so bad as to be extremely dangerous. Maybe he almost just hit a kid. Who knows?


I was thinking more on the lines of he was on his way to do mayhem. So many crazies these days.


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## ChortlingCrison (Mar 30, 2016)

TwoFiddyMile said:


> Driving naked with a machete- the new show on Tru TV.


All that is required to drive uberx. He fits the bill.


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## uber fool (Feb 3, 2016)

uberdriverfornow said:


> There is obviously something wrong with this story.


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## Bob Reynolds (Dec 20, 2014)

KevinH said:


> http://www.stuff.co.nz/world/americ...-hatchet-after-being-mistaken-for-Uber-driver
> 
> 
> 
> ...


I can see how riders might mistake this guy for a Uber driver. He fits right in.


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## rtaatl (Jul 3, 2014)

TwoFiddyMile said:


> Driving naked with a machete- the new show on Tru TV.


I can picture Danny Bonaduce and Tonya Harding doing through narratives on that one too....lol!


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## Uberchampion (Oct 17, 2015)

SEAL Team 5 said:


> A naked drunk 64 year old male swinging a hatchet? Yikes!!! Hopefully that was the only thing swinging. Now that gives real meaning to the Uber X rated platform.


Mark my words.

Don't pick fights with naked drivers. There's only one place they can conceal a weapon and you want no part of that....


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## cannonball7 (Feb 18, 2016)

One star for you Uber driver and no please keep the tip and the rest of your saggy junk as well.


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## Fuzzyelvis (Dec 7, 2014)

So they walked up thinking he was their Uber. Saw he was naked, presumably.

An argument ensued.

About WHAT? They wanted him to put clothes on to drive them? 

Once I see the person I THINK is my Uber driver is naked I'm walking away. I mean, at that point, what's to argue about? I'm not getting in the car either way, and I'm pretty sure I can get Uber to refund my cancellation fee.


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## Uberchampion (Oct 17, 2015)

Fuzzyelvis said:


> So they walked up thinking he was their Uber. Saw he was naked, presumably.
> 
> An argument ensued.
> 
> ...


Why would you walk away? Once he drops you off you send a nice email to Uber saying your driver was naked and they credit you back for the full fare...they may even give you a credit for your next ride


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## Sydney Uber (Apr 15, 2014)

uberdriverfornow said:


> There is obviously something wrong with this story.


Yeah, most crazy Americans would've had an Assult Rifle!


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## stuber (Jun 30, 2014)

To quote someone else's joke I saw here on another thread, "What's wrong with naked? I'm naked right now."


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## stuber (Jun 30, 2014)

Really...there should be a whole new tier of Uber introduced: Uber Nude. No Clothes Required. Please bring your own towel to sit on.


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## shiftydrake (Dec 12, 2015)

UTX1 said:


> while she's still naked and angry.
> Once she calms down, she'll probably put her clothes back on
> what a total piece of ass. maybe she has a sister ?


Hey UTX1 let me know if she has a sister that is just like her........wanna run around and chase me naked with a hatchet.........and if she does maybe we can hide all of their clothes before they sober up and calm down


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## shiftydrake (Dec 12, 2015)

They could have been taken to drop off........emailed Uber asking for partial refund..........stating their reason was because "driver was old naked man" ..... then say they would have asked for full refund but one of the riders thinks he might have made a "friend".........


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## Lnsky (Jan 2, 2016)

KevinH said:


> http://www.stuff.co.nz/world/americ...-hatchet-after-being-mistaken-for-Uber-driver
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Geez other than the drinking part I feel bad for this guy. He was accosted in his own vehicle by a bunch of drunk and unreasonable people with no warning and HE'S the only one that went to jail. That's Uber-class treatment right there only he didn't sign anything agreeing to it.

Poor guy has probably never even heard of Uber and thought he was under attack.

Why can't passengers figure out how to identify a vehicle. I've used Lyft while intoxicated many times before I was a driver. You get a picture of the driver, the car, the license plate number, their name and location. I've never entered the wrong car because I check the license plate.

Yet I've watched so many people hop into a black pickup truck when their assigned vehicle is a silver BMW.


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## D Town (Apr 8, 2015)

Lnsky said:


> Geez other than the drinking part I feel bad for this guy. He was accosted in his own vehicle by a bunch of drunk and unreasonable people with no warning and HE'S the only one that went to jail. That's Uber-class treatment right there only he didn't sign anything agreeing to it.
> 
> Poor guy has probably never even heard of Uber and thought he was under attack.
> 
> ...


He went to jail likely because whatever substance or illness caused him to jump into a car naked and start playing bumper cars BEFORE the pax ever came up to him likely had him foaming at the mouth and screaming about aliens trying to steal his kidneys when the cops showed.


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## Lnsky (Jan 2, 2016)

D Town said:


> He went to jail likely because whatever substance or illness caused him to jump into a car naked and start playing bumper cars BEFORE the pax ever came up to him likely had him foaming at the mouth and screaming about aliens trying to steal his kidneys when the cops showed.


Right. But drunk Uber pax are a plague in society that go unpunished. I've watched and heard any a story of people assaulting random cars that aren't Ubers because they can't get in.

Zero ****s for those ransoms that got in that car. They'll mistakenly be screaming the next day about making Uber safe. Congrats on the Darwin Award alcohol isn't an excuse.


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## naplestom75 (May 3, 2015)

He hadn't experienced any "surge" in years and the pent up frustration got to him.


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## ND379 (Mar 29, 2016)

I had a good laugh. Thanks everyone.

And after last weekend, I can fully understand how the passengers stuck around and wrestled him. They were just as drunk as he was and wanted their cheap ride.


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## UTX1 (Dec 7, 2015)

D Town said:


> He went to jail likely because whatever substance or illness caused him to jump into a car naked and start playing bumper cars BEFORE the pax ever came up to him likely had him foaming at the mouth and screaming about aliens trying to steal his kidneys when the cops showed.


Most certain he was screaming about the aliens stealing his kidneys...He probably was screaming.
The take away here might very well be to ALWAYS speak CALMLY and with reasonable control
if reporting the aliens actually attempting to steal your kidneys. Get a description of the creatures
and very important, try to get a serial # or at least a model number of the alien space craft. SOP.


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## stuber (Jun 30, 2014)

ND379 said:


> I had a good laugh. Thanks everyone.
> 
> And after last weekend, I can fully understand how the passengers stuck around and wrestled him. They were just as drunk as he was and wanted their cheap ride.


People will go to amazing lengths to find a cheap price, or cheap entertainment.


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## Flarpy (Apr 17, 2016)

I don't know what's funnier...

... that people thought a drunk naked guy driving erratically was their Uber driver...

... or that the drunk naked guy was so upset by people thinking he was an Uber driver that he attacked them with a hatchet.


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## Flarpy (Apr 17, 2016)




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## stuber (Jun 30, 2014)

Can't wait for the John Oliver report on this.


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## stuber (Jun 30, 2014)

Fuzzyelvis said:


> So they walked up thinking he was their Uber. Saw he was naked, presumably.
> 
> An argument ensued.
> 
> ...


..." Put your clothes on Jackass, we've got to get to the next bar. It's two and a half blocks and we aint walking."


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## Bart McCoy (Nov 4, 2014)

Uberchampion said:


> Why would you walk away? Once he drops you off you send a nice email to Uber saying your driver was naked and they credit you back for the full fare...they may even give you a credit for your next ride





shiftydrake said:


> They could have been taken to drop off........emailed Uber asking for partial refund..........stating their reason was because "driver was old naked man" ..... then say they would have asked for full refund but one of the riders thinks he might have made a "friend".........


what in the world, did any of you guys even read the topic? The guy was NOT an Uber driver so why would he take them to any destination? And if pax emailed Uber they would NOT get credit NOR a refund because they NEVER took an Uber ride. Uber is not responsible for dummies riding with naked men who aren't Uber drivers


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## sicky (Dec 18, 2015)

Being called an Uber driver is so demeaning that even the naked crazy guy is offended enough to attack with a hatchet. Our reputation is that pitiful.


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## Uberchampion (Oct 17, 2015)

Bart McCoy said:


> what in the world, did any of you guys even read the topic? The guy was NOT an Uber driver so why would he take them to any destination? And if pax emailed Uber they would NOT get credit NOR a refund because they NEVER took an Uber ride. Uber is not responsible for dummies riding with naked men who aren't Uber drivers


Bart....go read the message I replied to and my post make more sense to you


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## UTX1 (Dec 7, 2015)

sicky said:


> Being called an Uber driver is so demeaning that even the naked crazy guy is offended enough to attack with a hatchet. Our reputation is that pitiful.


At times like, this I try to remember that we all share more in common than our differences....
...with the exception of wielding a hatchet around...and maybe the part about driving around naked....
other than that, we're all so much more alike than we would probably consider.

...huh ?  Even as the Summer time gets into full swing, I'll likely still drive with clothing on.

I'll see......


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## SurgeMachine (Mar 15, 2016)

Something tells me that driving naked, erratically with a hatchet is not the way to get 5 stars. But who am I to judge.


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## tommyboy (Mar 10, 2016)

Uber has good drivers I ask every customer how they feel about the service after 1000 rides the negative comments can be counted on one hand.Knocking uber drivers by other drivers is wrong I know there are problems that need to be addressed but insulting other drivers Achieves Nothing Worth while.


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## tommyboy (Mar 10, 2016)

This guy had no relation to uber but uber will still recipe the negative connotations associated with his actions.Im proud of who I am regardless of what I do for income. Driving for uber is decent honest work. Self worth does not equal net worth. For people that find this work beneath them just quit nobody's twisting your arm to drive


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## Bart McCoy (Nov 4, 2014)

SurgeMachine said:


> Something tells me that driving naked, erratically with a hatchet is not the way to get 5 stars. But who am I to judge.


and somebody actually gave you a like for this post, smh

another non-reader, the guy in question wasnt even an Uber driver, so what would he care about 5 stars?

I haven't seen one report of an Uber driver driving naked and erratically smh


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## Fuzzyelvis (Dec 7, 2014)

Flarpy said:


> I don't know what's funnier...
> 
> ... that people thought a drunk naked guy driving erratically was their Uber driver...
> 
> ... or that the drunk naked guy was so upset by people thinking he was an Uber driver that he attacked them with a hatchet.


 What's bad is that it could have ended up a tragedy, and that would not have been funny. Everyone involved was very lucky. The drunk pax weren't chopped to pieces, the naked guy wasn't shot...


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## Fuzzyelvis (Dec 7, 2014)

Bart McCoy said:


> and somebody actually gave you a like for this post, smh
> 
> another non-reader, the guy in question wasnt even an Uber driver, so what would he care about 5 stars?
> 
> I haven't seen one report of an Uber driver driving naked and erratically smh


 Just gave him another like. Do you have no sense of humor? Humor is rooted in truth (otherwise it's not funny). The truth is the rating system is ridiculous and deserves to be ridiculed.


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## Bart McCoy (Nov 4, 2014)

Fuzzyelvis said:


> Just gave him another like. Do you have no sense of humor? Humor is rooted in truth (otherwise it's not funny). The truth is the rating system is ridiculous and deserves to be ridiculed.


Right, the truth is he is Not an uber driver so otherwise now it's not funny


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## Bart McCoy (Nov 4, 2014)

ChortlingCrison said:


> He was in uber driver wanna-be isn't that close enough.


no


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## SurgeMachine (Mar 15, 2016)

Bart McCoy said:


> and somebody actually gave you a like for this post, smh
> 
> another non-reader, the guy in question wasnt even an Uber driver, so what would he care about 5 stars?
> 
> I haven't seen one report of an Uber driver driving naked and erratically smh


Its a joke bruh learn2laugh. Cheap rates must have fried your brain cells lol


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## Zoplay (Jun 17, 2016)

Is there any strategy that uber drivers alone will drink and drive? Stop Talking About Uber And Their Drivers without knowing the truth. Since it degrades the relationship between the Uber and its customers.


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## Fuzzyelvis (Dec 7, 2014)

Zoplay said:


> Is there any strategy that uber drivers alone will drink and drive? Stop Talking About Uber And Their Drivers without knowing the truth. Since it degrades the relationship between the Uber and its customers.


 By "its customers" do you mean the drivers, or the pax? Actually, it's very unclear WHO Uber's customers are. They say they're just a technology company. But we all use the app. Supposedly we AND the pax must be their customers, then.

But the pax are not their customers as far as the transportation, Uber SAYS. They're only ours. (Which the pax don't think is the case, or course). So which relationship are you talking about?


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## Zoplay (Jun 17, 2016)

Fuzzyelvis said:


> By "its customers" do you mean the drivers, or the pax? Actually, it's very unclear WHO Uber's customers are. They say they're just a technology company. But we all use the app. Supposedly we AND the pax must be their customers, then.
> 
> But the pax are not their customers as far as the transportation, Uber SAYS. They're only ours. (Which the pax don't think is the case, or course). So which relationship are you talking about?


Am talking about the passengers here.. by creating bad awareness about Uber will result in loss of hope among the passengers who would prefer Uber as their transportation medium.


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## Chicago88 (Feb 7, 2016)

I referred the naked guy to Uber as a driver...he only got 38 rides in before losing his mind. I sent Uber an email asking about my referral payment, they said not to worry...he doesn't have to do any background checks when he gets released, he can finish his last 2 rides and I'll get paid! Uber on!


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## Fuzzyelvis (Dec 7, 2014)

Zoplay said:


> Am talking about the passengers here.. by creating bad awareness about Uber will result in loss of hope among the passengers who would prefer Uber as their transportation medium.


 "Loss of hope"?

Only if pax complain and drivers stop driving will anything change. IMO the service needs to go to %@*& for Uber to change. So I don't care about their "loss of hope".


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## Adieu (Feb 21, 2016)

hbenaid404 said:


> I would be upset if pax enters my vehicle while pissing in my empty Gatorade bottle.


How's the, uhm, fit? I found it rather too... Cramped

Volume, too, was lacking.

For those with similar issues, I recommend Dole 1/2 gal juice jugs (clear vase-like, not solid handles)

PS don't use tropicana instead, not only more money, but als EXTREMELY worse cap reliability


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## Dontmakemepullauonyou (Oct 13, 2015)

Guys he was offline. Let the man air out between rides.


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## hanging in there (Oct 1, 2014)

Dontmakemepullauonyou said:


> Guys he was offline. Let the man air out between rides.


Rumor has it they also found a live hen in the front passenger seat, smoking a cigarette with a contented look on her face. Good thing the man chose to simply swing the hatchet, and not that poor chicken, at the misguided pax. Actually, now it all makes more sense!

The hen probably had her life spared due to the unforeseen series of events, heretofore noted as "Plan B".

"Plan A" was probably 1) buy live hen 2) "enjoy the company" of said hen 3) behead hen 4) bring home freshly beheaded hen for wifey to cook for din-din, (after carefully cleaning out the cavity, of course).


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## Adieu (Feb 21, 2016)

UTX1 said:


> Although....
> Wrestling a 29 year old naked woman (even with a hatchet) might be worth the challenge.
> Does anyone have a kink...I mean, a link to sign up for this instead ?


Fetlife?

Though you MIGHT have to settle for 39


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## Adieu (Feb 21, 2016)

hanging in there said:


> This story reminds me of the time when I called my pax to try and locate them, it turned out they were in a gas station parking lot instead of at the bar location next door where they were supposed to be. When I arrived they were in full knock-down drag-out fight mode with some other guy. The other guy turned out to be just some random guy sitting in his car when my pax came up to him and tried getting in his car, thinking it was their Uber (me). Guy in car just sees 3 drunk guys piling into his car and all hell broke loose.


Small wonder the old nudist crackhead had a hatchet....


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## Adieu (Feb 21, 2016)

Bart McCoy said:


> Yeah this happened in my market.
> 
> This shouldn't even be on the site because its not Uber related, although folks will still blame Uber for this incident smh
> 
> ...


Probably state troopers....like those CA Fish and Game that gave me a $451 cigarette but ticket in an urban area once upon a time


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## Adieu (Feb 21, 2016)

UTX1 said:


> At times like, this I try to remember that we all share more in common than our differences....
> ...with the exception of wielding a hatchet around...and maybe the part about driving around naked....
> other than that, we're all so much more alike than we would probably consider.
> 
> ...


I'll have you know I've driven 30+ states with a hatchet.... I think? afair, I got it at Walmart in Ohio or Indiana

Coleman brand, something like $7.95 on clearance.... Immediately rusted up like a mother, too


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## UTX1 (Dec 7, 2015)

Adieu said:


> I'll have you know I've driven 30+ states with a hatchet.... I think? afair, I got it at Walmart in Ohio or Indiana
> 
> Coleman brand, something like $7.95 on clearance.... Immediately rusted up like a mother, too


Well see, I didn't know that. But now I do. I think I want one now.


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## UTX1 (Dec 7, 2015)

Adieu said:


> Fetlife?
> 
> Though you MIGHT have to settle for 39


Can I get a 19 and a 20 together as a tag team instead ?

I can do the math later....


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## hanging in there (Oct 1, 2014)

UTX1 said:


> Although....
> Wrestling a 29 year old naked woman (even with a hatchet) might be worth the challenge.
> Does anyone have a kink...I mean, a link to sign up for this instead ?


I can see it now.... "Welcome WWE wrestling fans! In this corner we have "Big Bad Bertha weighing in at 332 pounds, naked, all oiled up and yielding a big hacket. In this corner we have "Hairy Barry", some horny naked dude who thinks he's gonna get some tonight, in front of 25 cameras and millions of spectators. Hope he doesn't get his head split in two like a coconut, like the last poor soul twenty minutes ago. Let the match begin!"


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