# DoorDash support told customer I was in the bathroom 🙄



## The Jax (Apr 17, 2018)

I stop in Chipotle and the order wasn't ready. I have been delivering for 9 hours so I figured now is a good time to take the kids to the pool.

Phone rings while I am in there. Its DoorDash support. I do not answer it because at the moment, I am working for number two (whose number two working for?). Phone rings again. Still I did not answer it. I then set the app to no more delivery offers and shut it off. I concluded what I thought was a great accomplishment which deserves a lifetime toilet achievement award then head out to grab the order. The girl who gives me the order said that DoorDash support called because the customer had a change in the order but that they took care of it and was all set.

I get in my car and start to route and the phone rings again. Its DoorDash support. I answer and the rep tells me the order was changed but they talked to Chipotle and it was taken care of. Then they asked me where I was. I told them that not that it was any of their business but the order was not ready when I arrived so I used the bathroom. She goes on with, "Well I tried to call you first several times. You must have been in there a long time. The merchant told me you were in the bathroom when I called". So I am like, "ok so what?". Then the rep goes on about how I shouldn't delay the order and that I should go unavailable if I need to use the bathroom for an extended period of time. I asked her what she supposed I do if I am waiting for an order and she says I need to use better time management because it delayed the customer's order. I was thinking, the nerve of this person! She then says she has to call the customer about the delay and happy dashing. Ok?

I arrive at the customer's house and its a meet at the door delivery. They come to the door with a smile on their face. They said hello and said, "Um someone from DoorDash called to tell me you were on the way and that there was a delay..... because you were in the bathroom for an extended period of time??". I was shocked. I told them yes I was but the order was not ready when I arrived. The customer laughed and just told me it was funny DoorDash told them that.

After the delivery, I gave it some thought and I did not find it funny at all. Why is Chipotle telling DoorDash I am in the bathroom and why is DoorDash telling the customer that? Like WHAT THE HECK?????


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## Illini (Mar 14, 2019)

Did you wash your hands after?


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## The Jax (Apr 17, 2018)

Illini said:


> Did you wash your hands after?


??? Always? What kind of question is that?


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## SleelWheels (Jun 25, 2019)

That’s awesome lol, what a great customer service model. Are you kidding me???? Plus you’re handling their food lol. Uh yeh, this guy just pinched a loaf but here’s your food, enjoy!


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## Pato Loco (Mar 14, 2020)

I always feel the need to take a dump after watching the Chipotle guy wrap up one of those burritos they make.


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## KevinJohnson (Mar 23, 2020)

Illini said:


> Did you wash your hands after?


The sign says only EMPLOYEES must wash hands


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## Mkang14 (Jun 29, 2019)

Thats crazy. Seems like everyone was out to shame you for dropping a deuce.

When nature calls there's nothing wrong with that. Support was really NOSEY, told pax who then called you out. Embarrassing.


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## Kings-Full (Mar 7, 2020)

Mkang14 said:


> Thats crazy. Seems like everyone was out to shame you for dropping a deuce.


I don't think I've ever heard a woman say, or type, 'dropping a deuce'! Good on ya love!


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## waldowainthrop (Oct 25, 2019)

I’m surprised that any single stage of this interaction happened, with the sole exception of the bathroom stop.


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## Illini (Mar 14, 2019)

Next time, don't tell them you were taking a dump.
Instead, tell them you were masturbating.


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## Mkang14 (Jun 29, 2019)

Kings-Full said:


> I don't think I've ever heard a woman say, or type, 'dropping a deuce'! Good on ya love!


I do kinda have a potty mouth &#129303;

Poor @The Jax was having a ball. Had no idea what was to come.


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## SleelWheels (Jun 25, 2019)

Mkang14 said:


> I do kinda have a potty mouth &#129303;
> 
> Poor @The Jax was having a ball. Had no idea what was to come.
> View attachment 498793


Mkang says and does what she likes.


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## kingcorey321 (May 20, 2018)

Fun fact about pooping.

https://inshorts.com/en/news/north-...er-kim-jongun-does-not-pee-poop-1504722737326


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## Another Uber Driver (May 27, 2015)

Illini said:


> Did you wash your hands after?


Did they tip?



The Jax said:


> ??? Always? What kind of question is that?


Did you use soap?

We can assume that everything came out allright, _correctamundo_?

The W.C. is the Bastion of Our Democracy. It is the Great Leveller. It matters not how much money you have, who you are, what you are, who you think you are , what you think you are, what you know or whom you know, _when ya' gotta' go, *ya' gotta' go.*_


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## sellkatsell44 (Oct 25, 2015)

I’ve seen women leave the bathroom straight from the stall as I’m washing my hands... 🤢🤮

why is it that not every women copy (brilliance) what they see?? If they see someone washing their hands after going to potty you’d think they’d do the same. Didn’t even mind my stink eye.


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## Monkeyman4394 (Jun 27, 2020)

The Jax said:


> ??? Always? What kind of question is that?


The funny kind. And the appropriate kind.


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## SleelWheels (Jun 25, 2019)




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## MikhailCA (Dec 8, 2019)

The Jax said:


> They said hello and said, "Um someone from DoorDash called to tell me you were on the way and that there was a delay..... because you were in the bathroom for an extended period of time??"


Hell yeah, I was in the bathroom and tried to fulfill your order at the time doordash called me. Here's your soda.


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## The Gift of Fish (Mar 17, 2017)

The Jax said:


> I stop in Chipotle and the order wasn't ready. I have been delivering for 9 hours so I figured now is a good time to take the kids to the pool.
> 
> Phone rings while I am in there. Its DoorDash support. I do not answer it because at the moment, I am working for number two (whose number two working for?). Phone rings again. Still I did not answer it. I then set the app to no more delivery offers and shut it off. I concluded what I thought was a great accomplishment which deserves a lifetime toilet achievement award then head out to grab the order. The girl who gives me the order said that DoorDash support called because the customer had a change in the order but that they took care of it and was all set.
> 
> ...


Judging by the last few Dashers I have had, you would have been fine with:

- "I called you several times. Where were you?"
- Hai no spikka dee Eeengleesh. Jess, Door Dash. Bai Bai"
[End call]


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## Mkang14 (Jun 29, 2019)

MikhailCA said:


> Hell yeah, I was in the bathroom and tried to fulfill your order at the time doordash called me. Here's your soda.


I was taking a poop, here's your &#127791; with extra meat.


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## Uber's Guber (Oct 22, 2017)

The Jax said:


> They said hello and said, "Um someone from DoorDash called to tell me you were on the way and that there was a delay..... because you were in the bathroom for an extended period of time??". I was shocked. I told them yes I was but the order was not ready when I arrived.


You explain to the customer _"I had to take a huge steamy shit. But you and your order were on my mind the whole time so after I wiped my ass with several swipes I didn't bother to take the time to wash my hands because I wanted to hurry the process so you receive your meal as quickly as possible. Enjoy!"_



Mkang14 said:


> I do kinda have a potty mouth &#129303;


I'll try to remember to close the lid when I'm done. &#129325;


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## Mkang14 (Jun 29, 2019)

Uber's Guber said:


> I'll try to remember to close the lid when I'm done. &#129325;


Sorry I reserve the right to refuse anyone. Unless you buy a $5 cone &#127846;.
&#129325;


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## Taxi2Uber (Jul 21, 2017)

sellkatsell44 said:


> Didn't even mind my stink eye.


I wouldn't mind your stink eye.


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## sellkatsell44 (Oct 25, 2015)

Taxi2Uber said:


> I wouldn't mind your stink eye.


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## ariel5466 (May 16, 2019)

I read this while taking a shit.


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## tohunt4me (Nov 23, 2015)

The Jax said:


> I stop in Chipotle and the order wasn't ready. I have been delivering for 9 hours so I figured now is a good time to take the kids to the pool.
> 
> Phone rings while I am in there. Its DoorDash support. I do not answer it because at the moment, I am working for number two (whose number two working for?). Phone rings again. Still I did not answer it. I then set the app to no more delivery offers and shut it off. I concluded what I thought was a great accomplishment which deserves a lifetime toilet achievement award then head out to grab the order. The girl who gives me the order said that DoorDash support called because the customer had a change in the order but that they took care of it and was all set.
> 
> ...


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## Illini (Mar 14, 2019)

ariel5466 said:


> I read this while taking a shit.


How timely.


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## Seamus (Jun 21, 2018)

If they have a problem with that in the special instructions it should say:

_Please don't use the bathroom on the delivery!_


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## evad77 (Oct 15, 2016)

i'm sorry i was taking the kids to the pool and the skinny one was being a problem,he didn't want to jump in and i had to coax and coax him before he finally took the plunge


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## Monkeyman4394 (Jun 27, 2020)

ariel5466 said:


> I read this while taking a shit.


Gross!


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## The Jax (Apr 17, 2018)

sellkatsell44 said:


> I've seen women leave the bathroom straight from the stall as I'm washing my hands... &#129314;&#129326;


Well for me that would be a man. And I always welcome that opportunity so I can confront them. Whether its still in the bathroom, outside of the bathroom, or in the parking lot. Not difficult to say, "Yo bro, you didn't wash your hands?". I do that every single time. Haven't got punched on the face yet. Most of the time they apologize and go back in and do it. Makes my day better knowing people are practicing good bathroom hygiene.



Mkang14 said:


> I was taking a poop, here's your &#127791; with extra meat.


Are you sure you are a female? I do not typically hear females speak like that.



Mkang14 said:


> Sorry I reserve the right to refuse anyone. Unless you buy a $5 cone &#127846;.


I don't get it unless you are making a joke about poop being ice cream.....



Seamus said:


> If they have a problem with that in the special instructions it should say:
> 
> _Please don't use the bathroom on the delivery!_


On my next day off, I am going to order DoorDash and put that in the delivery instructions then call support and make sure they ask the dasher not to do that just to see how they react when they show up. Hahah!!



evad77 said:


> i'm sorry i was taking the kids to the pool and the skinny one was being a problem,he didn't want to jump in and i had to coax and coax him before he finally took the plunge


WTF? No coaxing!! Keep your finger out of your butthole. No coaxing like damn!


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## ariel5466 (May 16, 2019)

Monkeyman4394 said:


> Gross!


Girls poop, too, ya know. &#128523;


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## SleelWheels (Jun 25, 2019)

The Jax said:


> Well for me that would be a man. And I always welcome that opportunity so I can confront them. Whether its still in the bathroom, outside of the bathroom, or in the parking lot. Not difficult to say, "Yo bro, you didn't wash your hands?". I do that every single time. Haven't got punched on the face yet. Most of the time they apologize and go back in and do it. Makes my day better knowing people are practicing good bathroom hygiene.
> 
> Are you sure you are a female? I do not typically hear females speak like that.
> 
> ...


Mkang says and does what she wants and the other females here can do the same.


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## Monkeyman4394 (Jun 27, 2020)

The Jax said:


> Well for me that would be a man. And I always welcome that opportunity so I can confront them. Whether its still in the bathroom, outside of the bathroom, or in the parking lot. Not difficult to say, "Yo bro, you didn't wash your hands?". I do that every single time. Haven't got punched on the face yet. Most of the time they apologize and go back in and do it. Makes my day better knowing people are practicing good bathroom hygiene.
> 
> Are you sure you are a female? I do not typically hear females speak like that.
> 
> ...


That whole first paragraph is a lie.

Women discuss poop. Maybe more than men.

2 Girls, 1 Cup.

Fingers wind up in anuses. Such is life.



ariel5466 said:


> Girls poop, too, ya know. &#128523;


That's a given. I never want to know that it's happening now. So many of my middle and high schoolers FaceTime friends and family while they're on the toilet.


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## ariel5466 (May 16, 2019)

Monkeyman4394 said:


> That's a given. I never want to know that it's happening now. So many of my middle and high schoolers FaceTime friends and family while they're on the toilet.


I thought it was relevant to the thread &#129335;‍♀&#128514;


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## Monkeyman4394 (Jun 27, 2020)

ariel5466 said:


> I thought it was relevant to the thread &#129335;‍♀&#128514;


Oh. It totally is. Still-ew.

Wait. Are you pooping again, right now?


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## The Jax (Apr 17, 2018)

ariel5466 said:


> Girls poop, too, ya know. &#128523;


Ok.... Picture a box. Picture a man in that box. Certain things that are discussed should be outside that box. Women using the toilet is one of those things. I mean, us guys put our faces "down there". The last thing we want to think about is stinky butts and farts. Like seriously.


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## ariel5466 (May 16, 2019)

The Jax said:


> Ok.... Picture a box. Picture a man in that box. Certain things that are discussed should be outside that box. Women using the toilet is one of those things. I mean, us guys put our faces "down there". The last thing we want to think about is stinky butts and farts. Like seriously.


So men can talk about poop and women can't? That's some double standard BS, right there!

If that's how you feel I advise you to never read this thread (OP is a woman). &#128514;

https://uberpeople.net/threads/the-poop-emergency.353392/
P.S. There's some stories in there that I couldn't stomach. It gets bad! Fair warning!


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## SleelWheels (Jun 25, 2019)

The Jax said:


> Ok.... Picture a box. Picture a man in that box. Certain things that are discussed should be outside that box. Women using the toilet is one of those things. I mean, us guys put our faces "down there". The last thing we want to think about is stinky butts and farts. Like seriously.


You're lucky your woman doesn't use you as a toilet. Maybe she will if she reads your opinions.


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## The Jax (Apr 17, 2018)

ariel5466 said:


> So men can talk about poop and women can't? That's some double standard BS, right there!


Yep! Absolutely its a double standard. In a general man's opinion, A female can bring up or joke that a man, any man, has taken a dump and things relating to the facts leading up to that dump and any other subject related matter.

However, a female should not bring up that her and any of her female friends or any females for that matter, with the exception of small female children, about using the toilet for its intended purpose, up to and including number 1, number 2, using a bidet, *anything relating to her period*, and/or in most cases, the fact they even used a bathroom or went inside one, recently, last week, last month, last year, or any other time in their life, excluding actual medical emergencies. &#128582;‍♀


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## Monkeyman4394 (Jun 27, 2020)

ariel5466 said:


> So men can talk about poop and women can't? That's some double standard BS, right there!
> 
> If that's how you feel I advise you to never read this thread (OP is a woman). &#128514;
> 
> ...


I wonder whether the irony of women being responsible for cleaning the vast majority of poo off of people young and old is utterly lost on him.



The Jax said:


> Yep! Absolutely its a double standard. In a general man's opinion, A female can bring up or joke that a man, any man, has taken a dump and things relating to the facts leading up to that dump and any other subject related matter.
> 
> However, a female should not bring up that her and any of her female friends or any females for that matter, with the exception of small female children, about using the toilet for its intended purpose, up to and including number 1, number 2, using a bidet, *anything relating to her period*, and/or in most cases, the fact they even used a bathroom or went inside one, recently, last week, last month, last year, or any other time in their life, excluding actual medical emergencies. &#128582;‍♀


What the flaming, flying fu-k?!


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## sellkatsell44 (Oct 25, 2015)

The Jax said:


> Yep! Absolutely its a double standard. In a general man's opinion, A female can bring up or joke that a man, any man, has taken a dump and things relating to the facts leading up to that dump and any other subject related matter.
> 
> However, a female should not bring up that her and any of her female friends or any females for that matter, with the exception of small female children, about using the toilet for its intended purpose, up to and including number 1, number 2, using a bidet, *anything relating to her period*, and/or in most cases, the fact they even used a bathroom or went inside one, recently, last week, last month, last year, or any other time in their life, excluding actual medical emergencies. &#128582;‍♀


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## OCUberGuy (Oct 11, 2017)

The Jax said:


> I stop in Chipotle and the order wasn't ready. I have been delivering for 9 hours so I figured now is a good time to take the kids to the pool.
> 
> Phone rings while I am in there. Its DoorDash support. I do not answer it because at the moment, I am working for number two (whose number two working for?). Phone rings again. Still I did not answer it. I then set the app to no more delivery offers and shut it off. I concluded what I thought was a great accomplishment which deserves a lifetime toilet achievement award then head out to grab the order. The girl who gives me the order said that DoorDash support called because the customer had a change in the order but that they took care of it and was all set.
> 
> ...


I know everyone's making a joke of this, but I think it's a great HR issue that ought to be resolved. Sharing of personal info is crazy and finding a restroom in this COVID environment is a whole another topic.


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## The Jax (Apr 17, 2018)

OCUberGuy said:


> I know everyone's making a joke of this, but I think it's a great HR issue that ought to be resolved. Sharing of personal info is crazy and finding a restroom in this COVID environment is a whole another topic.


About time we got back on topic


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## ariel5466 (May 16, 2019)

The Jax said:


> Yep! Absolutely its a double standard. In a general man's opinion, A female can bring up or joke that a man, any man, has taken a dump and things relating to the facts leading up to that dump and any other subject related matter.
> 
> However, a female should not bring up that her and any of her female friends or any females for that matter, with the exception of small female children, about using the toilet for its intended purpose, up to and including number 1, number 2, using a bidet, *anything relating to her period*, and/or in most cases, the fact they even used a bathroom or went inside one, recently, last week, last month, last year, or any other time in their life, excluding actual medical emergencies. &#128582;‍♀












Okay so for that I'll fill you in on the Diva cup. It's a great substitute for tampons. It's a silicone cup that you stick up your vagina and instead of absorbing menstrual blood, it collects it. It's great because it never leaks and you can leave it in a lot longer than a tampon can be left in. Every 12 hours or so, you have to pull it out, dump the collected blood into the toilet, and wash out the cup. Then you just stick it back in and you're good to go for another 12 hours! It's great!


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## The Jax (Apr 17, 2018)

ariel5466 said:


> View attachment 499009
> 
> 
> Okay so for that I'll fill you in on the Diva cup. It's a great substitute for tampons. It's a silicone cup that you stick up your vagina and instead of absorbing menstrual blood, it collects it. It's great because it never leaks and you can leave it in a lot longer than a tampon can be left in. Every 12 hours or so, you have to pull out, dump the collected blood into the toilet, and wash out the cup. Then you just stick it back in and you're good to go for another 12 hours! It's great!


-o:


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## Monkeyman4394 (Jun 27, 2020)

ariel5466 said:


> View attachment 499009
> 
> 
> Okay so for that I'll fill you in on the Diva cup. It's a great substitute for tampons. It's a silicone cup that you stick up your vagina and instead of absorbing menstrual blood, it collects it. It's great because it never leaks and you can leave it in a lot longer than a tampon can be left in. Every 12 hours or so, you have to pull out, dump the collected blood into the toilet, and wash out the cup. Then you just stick it back in and you're good to go for another 12 hours! It's great!


One cannot claim to have experienced real life until washing one's significant other's period blood from oneself.


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## ariel5466 (May 16, 2019)

Monkeyman4394 said:


> One cannot claimed to have experienced real life until washing one's significant other's period blood from oneself.


Yes, my husband does that a few times during a particular week of the month. &#128523;


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## Mkang14 (Jun 29, 2019)

The Jax said:


> Well for me that would be a man. And I always welcome that opportunity so I can confront them. Whether its still in the bathroom, outside of the bathroom, or in the parking lot. Not difficult to say, "Yo bro, you didn't wash your hands?". I do that every single time. Haven't got punched on the face yet. Most of the time they apologize and go back in and do it. Makes my day better knowing people are practicing good bathroom hygiene.
> 
> Are you sure you are a female? I do not typically hear females speak like that.
> 
> ...


Well you're ****ing rude.

Yes, I use my real picture. Are you sure you're a man? You seem like a 10 year old. Tee hee



The Jax said:


> I don't get it unless you are making a joke about poop being ice cream.....


I added a hyperlink to the thread im referencing. Where Young had to get a ice cream cone in an exchange for using the restroom.


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## The Jax (Apr 17, 2018)

OCUberGuy said:


> I know everyone's making a joke of this, but I think it's a great HR issue that ought to be resolved. Sharing of personal info is crazy and finding a restroom in this COVID environment is a whole another topic.


&#128530; .............. So you were saying


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## Monkeyman4394 (Jun 27, 2020)

Mkang14 said:


> I added a hyperlink to the thread im referencing. Where Young had to get a ice cream cone in an exchange for using the restroom.


Ahem. I was expecting a link.


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## Mkang14 (Jun 29, 2019)

SleelWheels said:


> You're lucky your woman doesn't use you as a toilet. Maybe she will if she reads your opinions.


In my opinion, there is a difference between a woman talking about poop and flinging it on @The Jax &#128523;

I have 2 kids and changed diapers, much discussion of poop with my mommy friends. When the kids output pebbles, gotta know what that mean
&#128996;&#128996;&#128996;&#128996;&#128996;

&#129300;


Monkeyman4394 said:


> Ahem. I was expecting a link.


Click Here

I know fancy &#128527;


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## Trafficat (Dec 19, 2016)

The Jax said:


> Yep! Absolutely its a double standard. In a general man's opinion, A female can bring up or joke that a man, any man, has taken a dump and things relating to the facts leading up to that dump and any other subject related matter.
> 
> However, a female should not bring up that her and any of her female friends or any females for that matter, with the exception of small female children, about using the toilet for its intended purpose, up to and including number 1, number 2, using a bidet, *anything relating to her period*, and/or in most cases, the fact they even used a bathroom or went inside one, recently, last week, last month, last year, or any other time in their life, excluding actual medical emergencies. &#128582;‍♀


Maybe I'm just a weirdo but I actually like to hear all those personal details about bathroom usage and periods. I'm also not easily grossed out by things. I just want to know everything in gory detail. My female friend told me that I was treating her like a science experiment and it was really weird. I can't say I disagree with her. To me the human body is an amazing machine, and I love learning about the experiences that a woman has versus a man so I can understand more about what makes men and women different. Some of the things my female friend did simply boggled my mind because they are not things I ever realized were.... well... things. A woman told me a few weeks ago that her whole body swells up due to her menstrual cycle, making jeans not fit! I was like, WOW! I'm 30 years old but I'm a dude, and I NEVER heard of that problem before, and so I asked other women about this issue and this is common, but nobody talks about it.

I'd study biology, medicine, psychology, etc. if I had enough time and money but I'm busy studying other topics and sadly the human lifespan is WAY too short to learn much. But I have an engineers mind of sorts and I know a lot of stuff about mechanics and product design, but one of my problems is an extreme lack of creativity. I'm always looking for "problems" to solve and then I write a proposed "solution" in my notebook, and estimate the cost of solving the problem and the profitability thereof. Usually I find that other people have already created solutions that exceed my own or that my solutions are way impractical or expensive, but I hope one day to make a great product that solves some problem. Since HALF of the population are women, I'm very interested to know about things they think about and challenges on a day-to-day basis so I can maybe try to think of some profitable solution.


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## ariel5466 (May 16, 2019)

Trafficat said:


> Maybe I'm just a weirdo but I actually like to hear all those personal details about bathroom usage and periods. I'm also not easily grossed out by things. I just want to know everything in gory detail. My female friend told me that I was treating her like a science experiment and it was really weird. I can't say I disagree with her. To me the human body is an amazing machine, and I love learning about the experiences that a woman has versus a man so I can understand more about what makes men and women different. Some of the things my female friend did simply boggled my mind because they are not things I ever realized were.... well... things. A woman told me a few weeks ago that her whole body swells up due to her menstrual cycle, making jeans not fit! I was like, WOW! I'm 30 years old but I'm a dude, and I NEVER heard of that problem before, and so I asked other women about this issue and this is common, but nobody talks about it.
> 
> I'd study biology, medicine, psychology, etc. if I had enough time and money but I'm busy studying other topics and sadly the human lifespan is WAY too short to learn much. But I have an engineers mind of sorts and I know a lot of stuff about mechanics and product design, but one of my problems is an extreme lack of creativity. I'm always looking for "problems" to solve and then I write a proposed "solution" in my notebook, and estimate the cost of solving the problem and the profitability thereof. Usually I find that other people have already created solutions that exceed my own or that my solutions are way impractical or expensive, but I hope one day to make a great product that solves some problem. Since HALF of the population are women, I'm very interested to know about things they think about and challenges on a day-to-day basis so I can maybe try to think of some profitable solution.


It's a little weird, but in a really good way. The Diva cup would've never been invented if someone didn't sit there and think about the things that suck about tampons and figure out a better way to catch the blood. Just like whoever invented tampons wouldn't have done it if they didn't think about a way to keep the blood inside and let women avoid having a big gross pad in their panties.


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## Mkang14 (Jun 29, 2019)

Trafficat said:


> Maybe I'm just a weirdo but I actually like to hear all those personal details about bathroom usage and periods. I'm also not easily grossed out by things. I just want to know everything in gory detail. My female friend told me that I was treating her like a science experiment and it was really weird. I can't say I disagree with her. To me the human body is an amazing machine, and I love learning about the experiences that a woman has versus a man so I can understand more about what makes men and women different. Some of the things my female friend did simply boggled my mind because they are not things I ever realized were.... well... things. A woman told me a few weeks ago that her whole body swells up due to her menstrual cycle, making jeans not fit! I was like, WOW! I'm 30 years old but I'm a dude, and I NEVER heard of that problem before, and so I asked other women about this issue and this is common, but nobody talks about it.
> 
> I'd study biology, medicine, psychology, etc. if I had enough time and money but I'm busy studying other topics and sadly the human lifespan is WAY too short to learn much. But I have an engineers mind of sorts and I know a lot of stuff about mechanics and product design, but one of my problems is an extreme lack of creativity. I'm always looking for "problems" to solve and then I write a proposed "solution" in my notebook, and estimate the cost of solving the problem and the profitability thereof. Usually I find that other people have already created solutions that exceed my own or that my solutions are way impractical or expensive, but I hope one day to make a great product that solves some problem. Since HALF of the population are women, I'm very interested to know about things they think about and challenges on a day-to-day basis so I can maybe try to think of some profitable solution.


When there are so many restrictions around what can be talked about and what shouldn't it seems almost shallow.

The most down to earth meaningfull people/ relationships are very open.

Now if he wants you to close the door &#128682;. We could do that.


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## Monkeyman4394 (Jun 27, 2020)

Mkang14 said:


> When there are so many restrictions around what can be talked about and what shouldn't it seems almost shallow.
> 
> The most down to earth meaningfull people/ relationships are very open.
> 
> Now if he wants you to close the door &#128682;. We could do that.


Not to mention that secrecy and taboo about these foundational elements of personhood often lead to shame, which is never useful.


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## SleelWheels (Jun 25, 2019)

Society is a *****. The younger we are when we learn to fly our freak flag the better.


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## June132017 (Jun 13, 2017)

I'm definitely picking up my own Chipoltle from now on. We all know he did his business while he brought the food in with him - gross!


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## Roadmasta (Aug 4, 2017)

$hit happens!


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## sellkatsell44 (Oct 25, 2015)

ariel5466 said:


> Yes, my husband does that a few times during a particular week of the month. &#128523;


Honestly I feel like guys don't mind. Some guys will fk you even during the week. Sheets washed/showers are the best. Just sayin'


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## tohunt4me (Nov 23, 2015)

Uber's Guber said:


> You explain to the customer _"I had to take a huge steamy shit. But you and your order were on my mind the whole time so after I wiped my ass with several swipes I didn't bother to take the time to wash my hands because I wanted to hurry the process so you receive your meal as quickly as possible. Enjoy!"_
> 
> 
> I'll try to remember to close the lid when I'm done. &#129325;


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## Arthur Dent (Jan 18, 2019)

The Jax said:


> I concluded what I thought was a great accomplishment which deserves a lifetime toilet achievement award


OK then, inquiring minds want to know, which type was the proud log ????


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## The Jax (Apr 17, 2018)

Arthur Dent said:


> OK then, inquiring minds want to know, which type was the proud log ????


I am not having this conversation


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## Iann (Oct 17, 2017)

Monkeyman4394 said:


> That whole first paragraph is a lie.
> 
> Women discuss poop. Maybe more than men.
> 
> ...


What is a 2 girls 1 cup?



Monkeyman4394 said:


> One cannot claim to have experienced real life until washing one's significant other's period blood from oneself.


Especially if they're Red Wings. Google it.


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## tohunt4me (Nov 23, 2015)

Trafficat said:


> Maybe I'm just a weirdo but I actually like to hear all those personal details about bathroom usage and periods. I'm also not easily grossed out by things. I just want to know everything in gory detail. My female friend told me that I was treating her like a science experiment and it was really weird. I can't say I disagree with her. To me the human body is an amazing machine, and I love learning about the experiences that a woman has versus a man so I can understand more about what makes men and women different. Some of the things my female friend did simply boggled my mind because they are not things I ever realized were.... well... things. A woman told me a few weeks ago that her whole body swells up due to her menstrual cycle, making jeans not fit! I was like, WOW! I'm 30 years old but I'm a dude, and I NEVER heard of that problem before, and so I asked other women about this issue and this is common, but nobody talks about it.
> 
> I'd study biology, medicine, psychology, etc. if I had enough time and money but I'm busy studying other topics and sadly the human lifespan is WAY too short to learn much. But I have an engineers mind of sorts and I know a lot of stuff about mechanics and product design, but one of my problems is an extreme lack of creativity. I'm always looking for "problems" to solve and then I write a proposed "solution" in my notebook, and estimate the cost of solving the problem and the profitability thereof. Usually I find that other people have already created solutions that exceed my own or that my solutions are way impractical or expensive, but I hope one day to make a great product that solves some problem. Since HALF of the population are women, I'm very interested to know about things they think about and challenges on a day-to-day basis so I can maybe try to think of some profitable solution.


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## Uber's Guber (Oct 22, 2017)

Iann said:


> What is a 2 girls 1 cup?


Google is your best (or worst &#129326 friend.
Proceed with caution!


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## KevinJohnson (Mar 23, 2020)




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## ariel5466 (May 16, 2019)

Iann said:


> What is a 2 girls 1 cup?


Google it. Have a vomit bucket ready and be prepared to be scarred for life.


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## Monkeyman4394 (Jun 27, 2020)

ariel5466 said:


> Google it. Have a vomit bucket ready and be prepared to be scarred for life.


Or enjoy it. We don't judge.


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## waldowainthrop (Oct 25, 2019)

Monkeyman4394 said:


> Or enjoy it. We don't judge.


I think most people here will judge. &#128517;

&#127846;


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## Mkang14 (Jun 29, 2019)

ariel5466 said:


> Google it. Have a vomit bucket ready and be prepared to be scarred for life.


So happy I never watched it

&#127846; is just &#127846;

☺


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## waldowainthrop (Oct 25, 2019)

The question is: what sick people were responsible for that video going viral? I would never send something like that to anyone even as a joke. I keep my interests to myself. 😅

If anyone hasn’t seen it, it’s a pornographic video that features poop. If you’re curious about that, enjoy. If you’re not, definitely don’t watch it. It’s way more graphic than you’d expect and it’s almost inconceivable that it became a viral video.

The joke is the shock value, but it’s a pretty cheap joke, even by the standards of American prank culture.


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## Mkang14 (Jun 29, 2019)

waldowainthrop said:


> The question is: what sick people were responsible for that video going viral?


@The Jax &#128175;


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## waldowainthrop (Oct 25, 2019)

Mkang14 said:


> @The Jax &#128175;


Probably the customer service agent that called his customer, tbh.


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## Iann (Oct 17, 2017)

waldowainthrop said:


> The question is: what sick people were responsible for that video going viral? I would never send something like that to anyone even as a joke. I keep my interests to myself. &#128517;
> 
> If anyone hasn't seen it, it's a pornographic video that features poop. If you're curious about that, enjoy. If you're not, definitely don't watch it. It's way more graphic than you'd expect and it's almost inconceivable that it became a viral video.
> 
> The joke is the shock value, but it's a pretty cheap joke, even by the standards of American prank culture.


You sure are the life of the party aren't ya?

Yummy! Should of used a waffle &#129479; cone


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## waldowainthrop (Oct 25, 2019)

Iann said:


> You sure are the life of the party aren't ya?


I think spoiling this one bit of internet ephemera is something more people should have done earlier on. Boring joke. &#128517;


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## UberLaLa (Sep 6, 2015)

Just sayin'...


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## Woohaa (Jan 15, 2017)

That DD rep was way outta line. No tact or privacy concerns from that one.


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## Monkeyman4394 (Jun 27, 2020)

waldowainthrop said:


> The question is: what sick people were responsible for that video going viral? I would never send something like that to anyone even as a joke. I keep my interests to myself. &#128517;
> 
> If anyone hasn't seen it, it's a pornographic video that features poop. If you're curious about that, enjoy. If you're not, definitely don't watch it. It's way more graphic than you'd expect and it's almost inconceivable that it became a viral video.
> 
> The joke is the shock value, but it's a pretty cheap joke, even by the standards of American prank culture.


Where there's a demand, there will be a supply; nature abhors a vacuum (I don't think that fits the context of whomever coined that phrase).


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## LoLo SF (Jul 12, 2019)

OCUberGuy said:


> I know everyone's making a joke of this, but I think it's a great HR issue that ought to be resolved. Sharing of personal info is crazy and finding a restroom in this COVID environment is a whole another topic.


I agree and would insist on having that CSR's head on a platter. What she did is completely inappropriate and unprofessional. Might even consider reporting it to a few news agencies.


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## tohunt4me (Nov 23, 2015)

LoLo SF said:


> I agree and would insist on having that CSR's head on a platter. What she did is completely inappropriate and unprofessional. Might even consider reporting it to a few news agencies.


News at11:00 !

Driver in Bathroom !


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## hooj (Aug 18, 2018)

The Jax said:


> I stop in Chipotle and the order wasn't ready. I have been delivering for 9 hours so I figured now is a good time to take the kids to the pool.
> 
> Phone rings while I am in there. Its DoorDash support. I do not answer it because at the moment, I am working for number two (whose number two working for?). Phone rings again. Still I did not answer it. I then set the app to no more delivery offers and shut it off. I concluded what I thought was a great accomplishment which deserves a lifetime toilet achievement award then head out to grab the order. The girl who gives me the order said that DoorDash support called because the customer had a change in the order but that they took care of it and was all set.
> 
> ...


Imagine you told them you were doing number three?!

&#127814; &#128400; &#128166;


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## Gone_in_60_seconds (Jan 21, 2018)

Mkang14 said:


> I was taking a poop, here's your &#127791; with extra meat.


Yup, extra dessert. Here's a free stinky brownie. LOL


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## Seamus (Jun 21, 2018)

So tonight I was legit in a Chipotle to pick up. The order wasn't ready So it was a good chance to pull a " @The Jax " as it is now forever known. I checked the special instructions for the order and it did not say "don't use the bathroom" so I felt like I was in the clear!


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## Gone_in_60_seconds (Jan 21, 2018)

Seamus said:


> So tonight I was legit in a Chipotle to pick up. The order wasn't ready So it was a good chance to pull a " @The Jax " as it is now forever known. I checked the special instructions for the order and it did not say "don't use the bathroom" so I felt like I was in the clear!


This is good, because UE got rid of the compensation time for waiting for the food. I think if you wait at least 25 minutes then you can cancel and get the fee for waiting. That would definitely be some "serious constipation"..


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## Robert Larrison (Jun 7, 2018)

That's why I prefer the customers bathroom over the restaurants dirty bathroom.

Especially since I'm bicycling sometimes a quick rinse in the shower is refreshing.

Ask the customer they prefer to tip on the app or in cash and if they are gonna finish all that?

Pro tip:
Don't use the guest soaps or towells









Gabrielle Union said her Uber driver asked to use her bathroom and 'dropped a deuce' on New Year's Eve


"Im pleased we clearly have a home & available reading material that screams 'Come in, get comfortable and drop the kids off at the pool,'" she said.




www.insider.com


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## ariel5466 (May 16, 2019)

Robert Larrison said:


> That's why I prefer the customers bathroom over the restaurants dirty bathroom.
> 
> Especially since I'm bicycling sometimes a quick rinse in the shower is refreshing.
> 
> ...


You use the customer's bathroom in their home? That's weird. What kind of reactions do you get when you ask?


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## dmoney155 (Jun 12, 2017)

The Jax said:


> I stop in Chipotle and the order wasn't ready. I have been delivering for 9 hours so I figured now is a good time to take the kids to the pool.
> 
> Phone rings while I am in there. Its DoorDash support. I do not answer it because at the moment, I am working for number two (whose number two working for?). Phone rings again. Still I did not answer it. I then set the app to no more delivery offers and shut it off. I concluded what I thought was a great accomplishment which deserves a lifetime toilet achievement award then head out to grab the order. The girl who gives me the order said that DoorDash support called because the customer had a change in the order but that they took care of it and was all set.
> 
> ...


Here's a fun bit of an answer to the customer: "Did they mention some got on the food or did they leave that part out?"


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## Jihad Me At Hello (Jun 18, 2018)

The Jax said:


> I stop in Chipotle and the order wasn't ready. I have been delivering for 9 hours so I figured now is a good time to take the kids to the pool.
> 
> Phone rings while I am in there. Its DoorDash support. I do not answer it because at the moment, I am working for number two (whose number two working for?). Phone rings again. Still I did not answer it. I then set the app to no more delivery offers and shut it off. I concluded what I thought was a great accomplishment which deserves a lifetime toilet achievement award then head out to grab the order. The girl who gives me the order said that DoorDash support called because the customer had a change in the order but that they took care of it and was all set.
> 
> ...


You were a lot nicer with that customer service droid than I would have been....


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## tohunt4me (Nov 23, 2015)

Jihad Me At Hello said:


> You were a lot nicer with that customer service droid than I would have been....












Laser Deployed . . .


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## Mkang14 (Jun 29, 2019)

Jihad Me At Hello said:


> You were a lot nicer with that customer service droid than I would have been....


Send them a special &#128230; . If you know what I mean &#128527;



ariel5466 said:


> You use the customer's bathroom in their home? That's weird. What kind of reactions do you get when you ask?


Never in a million years thought I would be in a situation to ask. But ****ing sf. I held in sooo long that I considered HARD asking them, think its less controversial for a female driver.

But ended up using a gas station one i saw close to her house. Fml it was disgusting but it was desperation.


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## SRGuy (May 17, 2016)

The Jax said:


> I stop in Chipotle and the order wasn't ready. I have been delivering for 9 hours so I figured now is a good time to take the kids to the pool.
> 
> Phone rings while I am in there. Its DoorDash support. I do not answer it because at the moment, I am working for number two (whose number two working for?). Phone rings again. Still I did not answer it. I then set the app to no more delivery offers and shut it off. I concluded what I thought was a great accomplishment which deserves a lifetime toilet achievement award then head out to grab the order. The girl who gives me the order said that DoorDash support called because the customer had a change in the order but that they took care of it and was all set.
> 
> ...


If you need to float a log then float a log. It's not your problem. You're taking your mandated rest break - when it's
convenient for you. But do wash your hands.


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## The Jax (Apr 17, 2018)

Mkang14 said:


> @The Jax &#128175;


&#129318;‍♂ Don't bring me into your dramatizations!



Seamus said:


> So tonight I was legit in a Chipotle to pick up. The order wasn't ready So it was a good chance to pull a " @The Jax " as it is now forever known. I checked the special instructions for the order and it did not say "don't use the bathroom" so I felt like I was in the clear!


&#128581;‍♂ Oh no. No No No. Don't create this "new thing" that has my name all over it now. My name should not come to mind to anyone who needs to take a dump while out on a delivery....



tohunt4me said:


> News at 11:00 !
> 
> Driver in Bathroom !
> View attachment 499687


On a completely unrelated note, I actually had a restaurant client who had an idea on an invention and went as far as consulting with an attorney about putting cameras in the bathroom stalls. The concept was to install them in a hollow box and have a sign in the stall that said "Camera in use, please wait for camera to be secured" and basically what it would do is it would take a picture of the toilet and around the stall when it was unoccupied. When someone walked into the stall, a door would go down and lock, blocking the camera. When the person is finished and opens the door, a sensor checks to see when its unoccupied then the door unlocks and raises and takes another picture. Both pictures are to be compared by in-house security that also monitors the restaurant. Customers who leave the stall a mess or don't flush were to be confronted and asked to leave. Depending on the severity, they would be trespassed.

This restaurant was a finer dining restaurant and had issues with people being filthy animals and the owner got tired of it. The attorney advised us that it was best not to do this as its difficulty to educate the general public about the cameras, when they take the pictures, and how the devices work and its a huge liability because people will think their pictures or video of them are being taken when its not. So it never happened but was fun to investigate the idea. He now has a janitorial type people, one woman and one man, who checks the stalls before and after and that does lead to arguments when people leave toilet paper all over the place, piss on the seat, or not flush.



Robert Larrison said:


> That's why I prefer the customers bathroom over the restaurants dirty bathroom.


He is obviously kidding. I have been delivering over 20 years and never used a customer's bathroom unless it was a public restroom in an office building.


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## Mkang14 (Jun 29, 2019)

The Jax said:


> &#129318;‍♂ Don't bring me into your dramatizations!
> 
> &#128581;‍♂ Oh no. No No No. Don't create this "new thing" that has my name all over it now. My name should not come to mind to anyone who needs to take a dump while out on a delivery....
> 
> ...


Yes boss


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## tohunt4me (Nov 23, 2015)

The Jax said:


> &#129318;‍♂ Don't bring me into your dramatizations!
> 
> &#128581;‍♂ Oh no. No No No. Don't create this "new thing" that has my name all over it now. My name should not come to mind to anyone who needs to take a dump while out on a delivery....
> 
> ...


PATENT IT & SELL IT TO SELF DRIVING CARS !


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## JDWhit_ (Jul 2, 2017)

Back in 2007 when the economy crashed, I fell behind with my SUV payments. The collection agency called every single on of my neighbors to tell them that I had not been paying my payments!


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## tohunt4me (Nov 23, 2015)

JDWhit_ said:


> Back in 2007 when the economy crashed, I fell behind with my SUV payments. The collection agency called every single on of my neighbors to tell them that I had not been paying my payments!


Burn down their office !


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## The Jax (Apr 17, 2018)

JDWhit_ said:


> Back in 2007 when the economy crashed, I fell behind with my SUV payments. The collection agency called every single on of my neighbors to tell them that I had not been paying my payments!


You obviously did not handle that properly. A simple no contact letter them would of fixed that issue before it started.


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## sd1303 (Nov 11, 2015)

The Jax said:


> Then they asked me where I was. I told them that not that it was any of their business


Full stop.


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