# Physically Attractive Pax



## Clarity (Sep 20, 2018)

The other night, as I saw this male pax approaching my car, I couldn't help but smile as soon as I realized how handsome he was. This really took me by surprise...both his look and how big I was smiling. I tried to fight the big smile at first but then I just surrendered. That made it easier for me to pleasantly greet him. His name was Tanner and for some reason that name turned me on even more. It was so fitting for his look. It didn't escalate into anything since I only speak when spoken to. I hope he thought I was cute at least.

I just felt like sharing that today.


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## rubisgsa (Jul 3, 2018)

wow


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## Iann (Oct 17, 2017)

With DSL's I'm fairly sure he was probably interested.


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## losiglow (Dec 4, 2018)

Iann said:


> With DSL's I'm fairly sure he was probably interested.


We'll see who else gets that :wink:


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## Soldiering (Jan 21, 2019)

If that is you in your avatar you are a physically attractive woman, should be gone for it. ?


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## TomTheAnt (Jan 1, 2019)

Ummm... :whistling:


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## Clarity (Sep 20, 2018)

Iann said:


> With DSL's I'm fairly sure he was probably interested.


What is a DSL? I thought that stood for a type of internet connection.



Soldiering said:


> If that is you in your avatar you are a physically attractive woman, should be gone for it. ?


That is me, thank you ?


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## losiglow (Dec 4, 2018)

Clarity said:


> What is a DSL?


Look it up on urban dictionary.


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## 25rides7daysaweek (Nov 20, 2017)

Clarity said:


> The other night, as I saw this male pax approaching my car, I couldn't help but smile as soon as I realized how handsome he was. This really took me by surprise...both his look and how big I was smiling. I tried to fight the big smile at first but then I just surrendered. That made it easier for me to pleasantly greet him. His name was Tanner and for some reason that name turned me on even more. It was so fitting for his look. It didn't escalate into anything since I only speak when spoken to. I hope he thought I was cute at least.
> 
> I just felt like sharing that today.


 I'm sorry I cant type anything without coming off like a jerk.... Ok well


losiglow said:


> Look it up on urban dictionary.


I just did you guys are sick!!!!


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## Pax Collector (Feb 18, 2018)

Clarity said:


> The other night, as I saw this male pax approaching my car, I couldn't help but smile as soon as I realized how handsome he was. This really took me by surprise...both his look and how big I was smiling. I tried to fight the big smile at first but then I just surrendered. That made it easier for me to pleasantly greet him. His name was Tanner and for some reason that name turned me on even more. It was so fitting for his look. It didn't escalate into anything since I only speak when spoken to. I hope he thought I was cute at least.
> 
> I just felt like sharing that today.


Did he..... tip? :biggrin:


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## UberAdrian (May 26, 2018)

Show me your face, I’ll tell you if he thought you were cute.


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## DustyToad (Jan 10, 2018)

Good thing you didn’t hit on him. How disappointed would you have been when he tells you he’s not into women?


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## Clarity (Sep 20, 2018)

losiglow said:


> Look it up on urban dictionary.


That's hot...



UberAdrian said:


> Show me your face, I'll tell you if he thought you were cute.


Haha yea right


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## UberAdrian (May 26, 2018)

Clarity said:


> That's hot...
> 
> Haha yea right


You can DM me, I won't spill your rating ?

Speaking of which, does anyone remember well known member Lollinator? I found her on Tinder recently. She wasn't as hot as her avatar but does know how to spell! 6.5/10. I swiped left.


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## rubisgsa (Jul 3, 2018)

its not a dating site and DSL is an internet connection right??? o wait i dont have to look it up i went to high school in the 90's


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## Clarity (Sep 20, 2018)

DustyToad said:


> Good thing you didn't hit on him. How disappointed would you have been when he tells you he's not into women?


Yeah good thing. I would actually be relieved since I want nothing to do with dating or sexy time right now, but I don't mind fantasizing.



UberAdrian said:


> You can DM me, I won't spill your rating ?


I'm good. That's okay


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## Patrick R Oboyle (Feb 20, 2018)

Clarity said:


> The other night, as I saw this male pax approaching my car, I couldn't help but smile as soon as I realized how handsome he was. This really took me by surprise...both his look and how big I was smiling. I tried to fight the big smile at first but then I just surrendered. That made it easier for me to pleasantly greet him. His name was Tanner and for some reason that name turned me on even more. It was so fitting for his look. It didn't escalate into anything since I only speak when spoken to. I hope he thought I was cute at least.
> 
> I just felt like sharing that today.


Yup.. Ive gotten that a few times too  
Have to to just... Focus on the road.. And dont be a creep. Cause.. Im a dude. Ajd looking at a hot chick in my car... Makes me a creep :/

So messed up how we cant admire a beautifully dressed and sexy woman without being considered a creep. But you can do it and its okay 

But ya.. Know how ya feel.


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## Clarity (Sep 20, 2018)

I just remembered I have a dashcam...I COULD get another look at him...
He's still fresh in memory plus I'm too lazy to go back.


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## UberAdrian (May 26, 2018)

Patrick R Oboyle said:


> Yup.. Ive gotten that a few times too :biggrin:
> Have to to just... Focus on the road.. And dont be a creep. Cause.. Im a dude. Ajd looking at a hot chick in my car... Makes me a creep :/


That's true! Don't look at your pax. It's very creepy. Especially if you use the mirror.

Fortunately for me all the hottest girls seem to sit in the front and chat me up. Sometimes they invite me places but I just flirt a bit and decline, cuz I have a girl and am not a pig!


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## mbd (Aug 27, 2018)

Looks- is that part of intelligence?? I think it is, I don't see any good looking hots begging on the streets.
It is powerful
I completely try to ignore hots, and it makes a uncomfortable ride. If you talk too much, they might think you are trying to hit on them , and if you don't talk too much, they get uncomfortable, because everybody talks to them. 

If they talk, then I talk, if not just try to make a good safe ride.

Without any question, I prefer 99% of the population, the non good looking once.


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## UberAdrian (May 26, 2018)

Clarity said:


> I just remembered I have a dashcam...I COULD get another look at him...
> He's still fresh in memory plus I'm too lazy to go back.


Whoa what a creeper! Guaranteed your memory will fade soon and you'll be on that video, saving it to the cloud like a real creep. Nobody ever suspects the females of creepin'. Then again nobody really cares. Female privilege is real!

If you liked him that much you shoulda made a move. Maybe he was single. And maybe he liked you back. Now you'll never know.


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## dnlbaboof (Nov 13, 2015)

if they intergrated tinder with uber somehow that would be one amazing app


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## amazinghl (Oct 31, 2018)

I thought for sure a male opened this thread....
I was wrong.


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## UberBastid (Oct 1, 2016)

UberAdrian said:


> Whoa what a creeper! Guaranteed your memory will fade soon and you'll be on that video, saving it to the cloud like a real creep. Nobody ever suspects the females of creepin'. Then again nobody really cares. Female privilege is real!
> 
> If you liked him that much you shoulda made a move. Maybe he was single. And maybe he liked you back. Now you'll never know.


As a certified and bonafied Old Guy I can tell you that someday, when you look back, it will be the chances you did NOT take that you will regret. Ask girl out and she laughs at you, yea, awful. Embarrassing. But you will live through it, and eventually forget it. Screw her. Her loss.
The one that you didn't ask ... that's the one that will haunt you. What might have been ... you'll never know.


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## #professoruber (Feb 19, 2018)

Clarity said:


> His name was Tanner and for some reason that name turned me on even more


This is where this post became interesting....just head up to the local college and I am sure you will find a bunch of Tanner's.


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## corniilius (Jan 27, 2017)

Sounds like you really need to get some action.


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## Lunger (Sep 13, 2017)

Clarity said:


> ....I hope he thought I was cute at least.


I always though you were cute.....but I am no Tanner!


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## corniilius (Jan 27, 2017)

Clarity said:


> The other night, as I saw this male pax approaching my car, I couldn't help but smile as soon as I realized how handsome he was. This really took me by surprise...both his look and how big I was smiling. I tried to fight the big smile at first but then I just surrendered. That made it easier for me to pleasantly greet him. His name was Tanner and for some reason that name turned me on even more. It was so fitting for his look. It didn't escalate into anything since I only speak when spoken to. I hope he thought I was cute at least.
> 
> I just felt like sharing that today.


I gotta admit. You got a purdy mouth.


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## Tarvus (Oct 3, 2018)

UberBastid said:


> As a certified and bonafied Old Guy I can tell you that someday, when you look back, it will be the chances you did NOT take that you will regret. Ask girl out and she laughs at you, yea, awful. Embarrassing. But you will live through it, and eventually forget it. Screw her. Her loss.
> The one that you didn't ask ... that's the one that will haunt you. What might have been ... you'll never know.


^^^^^
Truth!


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## corniilius (Jan 27, 2017)

DND is that you?


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## Clarity (Sep 20, 2018)

UberBastid said:


> As a certified and bonafied Old Guy I can tell you that someday, when you look back, it will be the chances you did NOT take that you will regret. Ask girl out and she laughs at you, yea, awful. Embarrassing. But you will live through it, and eventually forget it. Screw her. Her loss.
> The one that you didn't ask ... that's the one that will haunt you. What might have been ... you'll never know.


I get what you're saying and there's truth in it. I am just not into fishing for that right now. I've had my share of fun days. They're not over, just postponed.



corniilius said:


> DND is that you?


No but I like dnb....the music genre



UberAdrian said:


> That's true! Don't look at your pax. It's very creepy. Especially if you use the mirror.
> 
> Fortunately for me all the hottest girls seem to sit in the front and chat me up. Sometimes they invite me places but I just flirt a bit and decline, cuz I have a girl and am not a pig!


Damn I use the mirror a lot to look at the traffic behind me. I wonder if all those times pax thought I was checking them out...I try to avoid looking at them directly in the mirror but now I'm thinking I should avoid using that mirror altogether when I have pax.


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## UberAdrian (May 26, 2018)

Clarity said:


> I get what you're saying and there's truth in it. I am just not into fishing for that right now. I've had my share of fun days. They're not over, just postponed.
> 
> No but I like dnb....the music genre
> 
> ...


Don't worry about that. I am often a rider on UL also and sometimes I monitor the rear view. It's very obvious when the driver is looking at you instead of the rear traffic. Nobody would get confused about where you're looking. It's unbelievably obvious, not only as they're looking, but especially when they dart their eyes away.


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## rubisgsa (Jul 3, 2018)

i look at my pax in the rear view once or twice i want to know what the complete stranger behind me looks like this is called self preservation


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## MadTownUberD (Mar 11, 2017)

Clarity said:


> I get what you're saying and there's truth in it. I am just not into fishing for that right now. I've had my share of fun days. They're not over, just postponed.
> 
> No but I like dnb....the music genre
> 
> ...


A technique I use for this is angling the mirror up a little bit more than a normal driver would so that when someone is sitting in the backseat I can pretty much just see the top of their head but not their eyes. That way I can tell what direction they are looking or whether they've slumped down perhaps asleep. I'm almost 6 ft tall though so I'm not sure how this would work if you are not.


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## 25rides7daysaweek (Nov 20, 2017)

I was gonna say before now you know what it's like to be a guy. As I've gotten along in age my standards have dropped considerably. I got alot of very attractive women in the car everyday LoL. I've been married for 24 years and have never cheated but boy if I had a half pass for a day about 1/2 of my rides would be double rides....


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## NotanEmployee (Apr 20, 2019)

25rides7daysaweek said:


> I just did you guys are sick!!!!


Never fall for "look it up in urban dictionary." Its always a trap.


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## Matt Uterak (Jul 28, 2015)

Clarity said:


> The other night, as I saw this male pax approaching my car, I couldn't help but smile as soon as I realized how handsome he was. This really took me by surprise...both his look and how big I was smiling. I tried to fight the big smile at first but then I just surrendered. That made it easier for me to pleasantly greet him. His name was Tanner and for some reason that name turned me on even more. It was so fitting for his look. It didn't escalate into anything since I only speak when spoken to. I hope he thought I was cute at least.
> 
> I just felt like sharing that today.


Thanks for the ride.


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## 25rides7daysaweek (Nov 20, 2017)

MadTownUberD said:


> A technique I use for this is angling the mirror up a little bit more than a normal driver would so that when someone is sitting in the backseat I can pretty much just see the top of their head but not their eyes. That way I can tell what direction they are looking or whether they've slumped down perhaps asleep. I'm almost 6 ft tall though so I'm not sure how this would work if you are not.


I tilt my day mirror down while driving and that way I can kinda look at all I want. they dont really see me directly unless lean forward. The night mirror is the actual rearview. It's just better for me that way. ?


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## TheDevilisaParttimer (Jan 2, 2019)

Clarity said:


> The other night, as I saw this male pax approaching my car, I couldn't help but smile as soon as I realized how handsome he was. This really took me by surprise...both his look and how big I was smiling. I tried to fight the big smile at first but then I just surrendered. That made it easier for me to pleasantly greet him. His name was Tanner and for some reason that name turned me on even more. It was so fitting for his look. It didn't escalate into anything since I only speak when spoken to. I hope he thought I was cute at least.
> 
> I just felt like sharing that today.


Should've got his number yolo


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## songoku (Nov 27, 2016)

Clarity said:


> Yeah good thing. I would actually be relieved since I want nothing to do with dating or sexy time right now, but I don't mind fantasizing.
> 
> I'm good. That's okay


May I call it SLUUUBBERR ???

Jk. Beautiful story. ???


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## OldBay (Apr 1, 2019)

Clarity said:


> since I only speak when spoken to.


That bodes well for your future relationships and marriage.


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## pismire (May 2, 2017)

Clarity said:


> The other night, as I saw this male pax approaching my car, I couldn't help but smile as soon as I realized how handsome he was. This really took me by surprise...both his look and how big I was smiling. I tried to fight the big smile at first but then I just surrendered. That made it easier for me to pleasantly greet him. His name was Tanner and for some reason that name turned me on even more. It was so fitting for his look. It didn't escalate into anything since I only speak when spoken to. I hope he thought I was cute at least.
> 
> I just felt like sharing that today.


Trolling!


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## snackjack (Dec 8, 2017)

UberAdrian said:


> You can DM me, I won't spill your rating ?
> 
> Speaking of which, does anyone remember well known member Lollinator? I found her on Tinder recently. She wasn't as hot as her avatar but does know how to spell! 6.5/10. I swiped left.


Lollinator is a guy silly using a female photo.


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## Lissetti (Dec 20, 2016)

Pax Collector said:


> Did he..... tip? :biggrin:


What is it what you and tips @Pax Collector :roflmao::roflmao::roflmao:


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## UberAdrian (May 26, 2018)

snackjack said:


> Lollinator is a guy silly using a female photo.


Weirdo! Does he live in Toronto? He might have found the same girl on Tinder and stolen one of the pics for the avatar. I only recognized her because one of her photos was the same one as the avatar, and then I cross referenced and it was the exact same photo.


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## Pax Collector (Feb 18, 2018)

Lissetti said:


> What is it what you and tips @Pax Collector :roflmao::roflmao::roflmao:


Uh oh, I'm forming a pattern :biggrin:


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## BuckleUp (Jan 18, 2018)

Clarity said:


> The other night, as I saw this male pax approaching my car, I couldn't help but smile as soon as I realized how handsome he was. This really took me by surprise...both his look and how big I was smiling. I tried to fight the big smile at first but then I just surrendered. That made it easier for me to pleasantly greet him. His name was Tanner and for some reason that name turned me on even more. It was so fitting for his look. It didn't escalate into anything since I only speak when spoken to. I hope he thought I was cute at least.
> 
> I just felt like sharing that today.


Is that all to the story?
I just popped open a bottle of red and settled down to a raunchy tale of bareback uber sex in the rear seat.
So disappointed.
1 star for you.


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## KD_LA (Aug 16, 2017)

Clarity said:


> *Physically Attractive Pax*


The much sought after UberXXX service


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## estore009 (Oct 14, 2017)

Clarity said:


> I just felt like sharing that today.


Haha, thanks for the sharing! Wish you pick him up again...


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## Stevie The magic Unicorn (Apr 3, 2018)

And yet if I had said anything about a cute lady-unicorn I picked up y’all girls would give me crap for talking about it.

And if I had a bunch of handsy hoo-mans woman folk feeling up my mane and caressing my face you would have zero sympathy and call me lucky for the attention,

While I’m horrifically creeped out as the feel me up hoping some magic rubs off.


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## Ssgcraig (Jul 8, 2015)

rubisgsa said:


> its not a dating site and DSL is an internet connection right??? o wait i dont have to look it up i went to high school in the 90's


Digital Subscriber Line.


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## Christinebitg (Jun 29, 2018)

Patrick R Oboyle said:


> So messed up how we cant admire a beautifully dressed and sexy woman without being considered a creep


You can. But please try not to stare.

If you don't know the difference, that would make it a much bigger problem for you when you in the company of attractive women.

Yes, I know there's a double standard. But an attractive woman who wants to meet you will find a way to initiate a conversation. It'll feel to you like she's talking about nonsense. When it feels out of the ordinary, that's your cue to move forward a little bit. (No, not to come on strong. This is a dance, not a wrestling match.)

Christine


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## Another Uber Driver (May 27, 2015)

Christinebitg said:


> an attractive woman who wants to meet you will find a way to initiate a conversation.


................as will any of the Lee sisters.....................................

It was not Tanner Roark; the Reds are in California, right now. Original Poster is from New Jersey.


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## Christinebitg (Jun 29, 2018)

Another Uber Driver said:


> ................as will any of the Lee sisters...............................


I looked on line, but didn't find anything. What's the reference?


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## Another Uber Driver (May 27, 2015)

Christinebitg said:


> reference?


Beast Lee
Ghast Lee
Home Lee

and

Ug Lee


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## Lissetti (Dec 20, 2016)

Another Uber Driver said:


> Beast Lee
> Ghast Lee
> Home Lee
> 
> ...


Oh Jeez......it's too early for this @Another Uber Driver :biggrin: :biggrin:


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## Christinebitg (Jun 29, 2018)

Another Uber Driver said:


> Beast Lee
> Ghast Lee
> Home Lee
> 
> ...


Must be Asian. (haha)


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## Another Uber Driver (May 27, 2015)

Lissetti said:


> it's too early for this @Another Uber Driver


Tanner Roark is pitching tonight for Cincinnati against Oakland. The American West and National Central drew each other for Interleague, this year, but Cincinnati does not go to Seattle until September. Seattle does not play in Cincinnati. On some of the interleague, you do not get the same teams in both parks. On some, you do. It depends on how MLB can work the schedules.


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## UberAdrian (May 26, 2018)

> You can. But please try not to stare.
> 
> If you don't know the difference, that would make it a much bigger problem for you when you in the company of attractive women.


I will expand on this by pointing out a common situation where staring a bit is good. If you see a cute girl on the street and are checking her out and she notices you noticing her, that's a good time to stare a bit and flash a smile. Darting your eyes away as soon as she sees you is a pathetic beta move.

There are other niche situations like this when staring a bit is better than not staring. The game ends when she looks away.


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## Munsuta (May 4, 2019)

Who gives a shit


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## Jay Dean (Apr 3, 2015)

Many days I only select rides on lyft from dudes only, so much easier work then to hear egos.


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## rubisgsa (Jul 3, 2018)

yeah i have tons of stories but as a male i keep my mouth shut and fantasize privately.

I dont go on a forum with thousands of users and broadcast hey i really wanted to do him! lol hahahahahahahahaa

big deal need attention much?
\
for real geeeeeeeeeeeeeez smh


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## Munsuta (May 4, 2019)

rubisgsa said:


> yeah i have tons of stories but as a male i keep my mouth shut and fantasize privately.
> 
> I dont go on a forum with thousands of users and broadcast hey i really wanted to do him! lol hahahahahahahahaa
> 
> ...


Of all places to attention *****, the stories section on a Uber forum... Le sigh


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## UberAdrian (May 26, 2018)

Munsuta said:


> Of all places to attention w.h.o.r.e, the stories section on a Uber forum... Le sigh
> View attachment 318906


You sound disgruntled. Not getting any? That's tough.


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## corniilius (Jan 27, 2017)

Why does this come to mind?


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## Munsuta (May 4, 2019)

UberAdrian said:


> You sound disgruntled. Not getting any? That's tough.


White Knight to the rescue!

There's a difference between being disgruntled and calling out attention seekers. Threads like this are equivalent to throwing chum over board in shark territory.


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## corniilius (Jan 27, 2017)

eww..oh, chum...


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## UberAdrian (May 26, 2018)

Munsuta said:


> White Knight to the rescue!
> 
> There's a difference between being disgruntled and calling out attention seekers. Threads like this are equivalent to throwing chum over board in shark territory.


You're projecting. This is the stories section. She told a story. End of story.


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## Woohaa (Jan 15, 2017)

Iann said:


> With DSL's I'm fairly sure he was probably interested.


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## Invisible (Jun 15, 2018)

Another Uber Driver said:


> Beast Lee
> Ghast Lee
> Home Lee
> 
> ...


Where does butterface fit in then? A friend told me about it years ago, meaning everything but her face.



UberAdrian said:


> There are other niche situations like this when staring a bit is better than not staring. The game ends when she looks away.


If she looks away, she could also be shy.

To the OP,

I drove a very attractive man this week. But he didn't make me nervous because he was very nice and easy to talk to.

I don't get why he and other male riders, who are alone, sit next to me since I'm a woman. 
None of those who have made me uncomfortable. But one guys heavy cologne was making me sick.

All the solo woman riders smile when they see me. I'm guessing because they're relieved to have a woman driver. It's just odd.


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## Wrb06wrx (Sep 20, 2017)

Clarity said:


> Damn I use the mirror a lot to look at the traffic behind me. I wonder if all those times pax thought I was checking them out...I try to avoid looking at them directly in the mirror but now I'm thinking I should avoid using that mirror altogether when I have pax.


Always use your mirrors but just keep doing what you're doing avoid eye contact(dont actually be checking them out) I use my rearview all the time yes there has been an occasional awkward moment but I'm usually conversating with my pax so it's not completely awkward


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## Lissetti (Dec 20, 2016)

I don't care how attractive they are....they aren't my type....and I'm not theirs..... ? 


Pax = Not my type. 

Simple as that for me.


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## EphLux (Aug 10, 2018)

Clarity said:


> The other night, as I saw this male pax approaching my car, I couldn't help but smile as soon as I realized how handsome he was. This really took me by surprise...both his look and how big I was smiling. I tried to fight the big smile at first but then I just surrendered. That made it easier for me to pleasantly greet him. His name was Tanner and for some reason that name turned me on even more. It was so fitting for his look. It didn't escalate into anything since I only speak when spoken to. I hope he thought I was cute at least.
> 
> I just felt like sharing that today.


Good looking lady Pax are a dime a dozen here in Los Angeles. But only 1 of 3000 ladies brought a smile to my face. And When she caught me with my eyes wide open, she didnt give me a dirty look. Thats how much self confidence she had. And she tipped me $5.


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## Boca Ratman (Jun 6, 2018)

UberAdrian said:


> I will expand on this by pointing out a common situation where staring a bit is good. If you see a cute girl on the street and are checking her out and she notices you noticing her, that's a good time to stare a bit and flash a smile. Darting your eyes away as soon as she sees you is a pathetic beta move.
> 
> There are other niche situations like this when staring a bit is better than not staring. The game ends when she looks away.


I find screaming "Woooooooo, baby shake it! " as I drive past or something along those lines to be quite effective.


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## KD_LA (Aug 16, 2017)

Lissetti said:


> Pax = Not my type.


By decision, or by affiliation?


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## Lissetti (Dec 20, 2016)

KD_LA said:


> By decision, or by affiliation?


Anyone has the power to have me deactivated with a lie, is not my type.


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## KD_LA (Aug 16, 2017)

Lissetti said:


> Anyone has the power to have me deactivated with a lie, is not my type.


So then technically it's not that any given pax is not your type, you could very well drive a very nice gentleman who is absolutely your type. You just don't want to jeopardize your driver account, so technically it's your policy decision-- and not a bad one at that. ?


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## BBslider001 (Apr 24, 2019)

rubisgsa said:


> i look at my pax in the rear view once or twice i want to know what the complete stranger behind me looks like this is called self preservation


My rear view always only shows the top of their head. I hate it because 75% of the time, I have no idea what they really look like. Been hit on too, as mentioned here...it's usually ENTIRELY awkward. I'm married with two kiddos, and yes, I wear my ring. Had a group of three girls in the car last week and her friend says "Jessica, stop hitting on him" to the girl sitting up front....she didn't deny it....was pretty awkward.


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

The most attractive pax have jumped into the front seat lately. My GPS is in the center of the dash, so I keep looking at legs every time I need to check the next turn. Argh!! ?


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## Christinebitg (Jun 29, 2018)

BBslider001 said:


> her friend says "Jessica, stop hitting on him" to the girl sitting up front....she didn't deny it....was pretty awkward.


The only person it was awkward for was you.

Jessica didn't care, she was having a good time. Her friend has almost certainly seen that behaviour from her before.


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## BBslider001 (Apr 24, 2019)

Christinebitg said:


> The only person it was awkward for was you.
> 
> Jessica didn't care, she was having a good time. Her friend has almost certainly seen that behaviour from her before.


Never said it was awkward for anyone BUT me. Awkward all the same. And yeah, I have no illusions if granduer about my looks.


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## corniilius (Jan 27, 2017)

Lissetti said:


> I don't care how attractive they are....they aren't my type....and I'm not theirs..... ?
> 
> Pax = Not my type.
> 
> Simple as that for me.


They can't handle you in the first place. Honey badgers are special.


----------



## Lissetti (Dec 20, 2016)

We gotta have our alphas......


----------



## Antquisha (Apr 12, 2019)

Lissetti said:


> Anyone has the power to have me deactivated with a lie, is not my type.


I wish I could like that comment 10 times. Strictly business!

I actually used to talk to a fellow driver from Philly who had a habit of hooking up with pax. White mature woman. Prime targets were much younger black men. She specifically liked the "thug type." She would usually bond with them talking about rap, which she loved. We had many arguments over it because while I understood she rarely met guys otherwise I thought it was really unprofessional. And it wasn't my business but I found her taste to be ... ya know.

I warned her about getting reported once the fling went sour. She was already deactivated on Uber so I warned her about messing with her main Lyft income. One of the guys did in fact try to get her fired but I guess she dodged that bullet.

Needless to say, when it comes to pax just take their money. Nothing more!


----------



## Lissetti (Dec 20, 2016)

Antquisha said:


> I wish I could like that comment 10 times. Strictly business!
> 
> I actually used to talk to a fellow driver from Philly who had a habit of hooking up with pax. White mature woman. Prime targets were much younger black men. She specifically liked the "thug type." We had many arguments over it because while I understood she rarely met guys otherwise I thought it was really unprofessional. And it wasn't my business but I found her taste to be ... ya know.
> 
> ...


Wow that's a shame....She obviously misused the Uber app as a dating app, and yet how quickly the tables could have been turned on the young men had they got caught in the act and she tried to save face and her job. Who knows what she would have said to an officer who rolled up on that car in the middle of some car action.


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## Antquisha (Apr 12, 2019)

Lissetti said:


> Wow that's a shame....She obviously misused the Uber app as a dating app, and yet how quickly the tables could have been turned on the young men had they got caught in the act and she tried to save face and her job. Who knows what she would have said to an officer who rolled up on that car in the middle of some car action.


Oh, she used to go to their houses ... in the hood. Not sure if that's better or worse than car action ?. 1 even turned into a stalker calling from friends' phones after she blocked him. Yeah, she was in deep.


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## corniilius (Jan 27, 2017)

Lissetti said:


> We gotta have our alphas......
> 
> View attachment 319655


I got to admit, I'm a little more of a sigma. Bit, clawed and scratch my way to what I want.


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## KD_LA (Aug 16, 2017)

I prefer delta.


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## Christinebitg (Jun 29, 2018)

Antquisha said:


> She specifically liked the "thug type." She would usually bond with them talking about rap, which she loved.


I've known a few women like that. It's not my thing, but the ones who do are *really* into the whole lifestyle.

As a generalization, they get interested in rap music because of the lifestyle, not as a coincidence.


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## 25rides7daysaweek (Nov 20, 2017)

Lissetti said:


> Wow that's a shame....She obviously misused the Uber app as a dating app, and yet how quickly the tables could have been turned on the young men had they got caught in the act and she tried to save face and her job. Who knows what she would have said to an officer who rolled up on that car in the middle of some car action.


Next?


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## Antquisha (Apr 12, 2019)

Christinebitg said:


> It's not my thing


I'll never understand the thought process behind how an uneducated man, with pants halfway down his butt, with shady sources of income, who never responds to her texts after certain hours, becomes a woman's "thing" lol.

I suspect it has a bit to do with really poor self-esteem. And in my ex friend's case, mandingo addiction. Gotta have it no matter the risk.


----------



## k4ever (Oct 12, 2016)

Antquisha said:


> I'll never understand the thought process behind how an uneducated man, with pants halfway down his butt, with shady sources of income, who never responds to her texts after certain hours, becomes a woman's "thing" lol.
> 
> I suspect it has a bit to do with really poor self-esteem. And in my ex friend's case, mandingo addiction. Gotta have it no matter the risk.


So your ex left you because she wanted bigger ...

ouch.


----------



## corniilius (Jan 27, 2017)

Christinebitg said:


> I've known a few women like that. It's not my thing, but the ones who do are *really* into the whole lifestyle.
> 
> As a generalization, they get interested in rap music because of the lifestyle, not as a coincidence.


Garbage in, garbage out.


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## Clarity (Sep 20, 2018)

Munsuta said:


> Who gives a shit


You obviously do since you bothered to comment.


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## KD_LA (Aug 16, 2017)

Clarity said:


> You obviously do since you bothered to comment.


He/she/it/they are just jealous


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## Clarity (Sep 20, 2018)

KD_LA said:


> The much sought after UberXXX service :biggrin:
> 
> View attachment 318806


I feel like the price for Kinky should be much higher


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## VanGuy (Feb 15, 2019)

Clarity said:


> I feel like the price for Kinky should be much higher


Not a bad idea for XL drivers. You got that third bench sitting there empty most of the time.


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## corniilius (Jan 27, 2017)

VanGuy said:


> Not a bad idea for XL drivers. You got that third bench sitting there empty most of the time. :smiles:


weeeell, if the back seat is big enough... Not trying to catch a case though. Better to just take it to the momo.


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## Trafficat (Dec 19, 2016)

Lissetti said:


> Anyone has the power to have me deactivated with a lie, is not my type.


While theoretically possible, I would venture to guess that the risk for a female driver being deactivated for interacting with a male pax is far less than for a male interacting with a female pax.


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## Lissetti (Dec 20, 2016)

Trafficat said:


> While theoretically possible, I would venture to guess that the risk for a female driver being deactivated for interacting with a male pax is far less than for a male interacting with a female pax.


A small risk yes...but still a risk and not worth it.


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## dryverjohn (Jun 3, 2018)

I was on the phone with my buddy and laughed when I saw this ride request. It said Channel, not Chanel. I told him, I'll bet you $1M this rider doesn't look like her picture, before she arrived. Thankfully, he didn't take the bet. It was her, spoke perfect Castilian Spanish, oh and the ride was only 100 miles. I was expecting something totally different. Talk about confidence, when your picture is your bikini shot. Wowsa. Was wearing jeans, black heels and a blouse that was a little small over the chest. Not all days suck being a Lyft/Uber driver. May have to download the vantrue video as I wouldn't believe this story either.


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## KD_LA (Aug 16, 2017)

Clarity said:


> I feel like the price for Kinky should be much higher


That's per minute!



dryverjohn said:


> I was on the phone with my buddy and laughed when I saw this ride request. It said Channel, not Chanel. I told him, I'll bet you $1M this rider doesn't look like her picture, before she arrived. Thankfully, he didn't take the bet. It was her, spoke perfect Castilian Spanish, oh and the ride was only 100 miles. I was expecting something totally different. Talk about confidence, when your picture is your bikini shot. Wowsa. Was wearing jeans, black heels and a blouse that was a little small over the chest. Not all days suck being a Lyft/Uber driver. May have to download the vantrue video as I wouldn't believe this story either.


Ay caramba!


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## UberjackA (Mar 20, 2019)

dryverjohn said:


> I was on the phone with my buddy and laughed when I saw this ride request. It said Channel, not Chanel. I told him, I'll bet you $1M this rider doesn't look like her picture, before she arrived. Thankfully, he didn't take the bet. It was her, spoke perfect Castilian Spanish, oh and the ride was only 100 miles. I was expecting something totally different. Talk about confidence, when your picture is your bikini shot. Wowsa. Was wearing jeans, black heels and a blouse that was a little small over the chest. Not all days suck being a Lyft/Uber driver. May have to download the vantrue video as I wouldn't believe this story either.


I bet the whole time you were thinking you wish you can get into her pants!


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## Clarity (Sep 20, 2018)

KD_LA said:


> That's per minute!


$29.75/min for sexy time...well damn


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## UberjackA (Mar 20, 2019)

dryverjohn: You liked my reply, I guess I was right on. Feel sorry for you, can only dream. Are you married? wonder what your wife/girlfriend will say if she saw your post, LOL


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## Christinebitg (Jun 29, 2018)

UberjackA said:


> dryverjohn: You liked my reply, I guess I was right on. Feel sorry for you, can only dream. Are you married? wonder what your wife/girlfriend will say if she saw your post, LOL


I'd have thought the same thing, and she's not even my type.

You are, of course, assuming that dryverjohn -has- a Significant Other. I do, but we have an open relationship, which was at the request of my S.O.

Some other people have a "look, but don't touch" agreement. I'm guessing that's not your situation.


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## Kpeter3511 (Mar 25, 2019)

Haha next time say something, like did you have fun tonight, he would prob appreciate the conversation.


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## Clarity (Sep 20, 2018)

Kpeter3511 said:


> Haha next time say something, like did you have fun tonight, he would prob appreciate the conversation.


Nice one. I can give that a shot.


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## Wingzking (Apr 30, 2019)

Clarity said:


> The other night, as I saw this male pax approaching my car, I couldn't help but smile as soon as I realized how handsome he was. This really took me by surprise...both his look and how big I was smiling. I tried to fight the big smile at first but then I just surrendered. That made it easier for me to pleasantly greet him. His name was Tanner and for some reason that name turned me on even more. It was so fitting for his look. It didn't escalate into anything since I only speak when spoken to. I hope he thought I was cute at least.
> 
> I just felt like sharing that today.


TMI


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## Ovaro (Dec 18, 2018)

Clarity said:


> The other night, as I saw this male pax approaching my car, I couldn't help but smile as soon as I realized how handsome he was. This really took me by surprise...both his look and how big I was smiling. I tried to fight the big smile at first but then I just surrendered. That made it easier for me to pleasantly greet him. His name was Tanner and for some reason that name turned me on even more. It was so fitting for his look. It didn't escalate into anything since I only speak when spoken to. I hope he thought I was cute at least.
> 
> I just felt like sharing that today.


You should have asked him out. Uber and lyft keep on cutting our rates. The least that you can do is to get you an attractive pax. If the attraction is mutual, then make the next move.


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## DC2VEGAS (Jun 5, 2019)

A little off subject, the other day I saw a spot I loved, del taco?when I sat down to eat I somehow still had the receipt. The young girl gave me the senior discount without asking, sigh..... young love is sweet though?. I must look ancient to an 18 year old cutie. At least my wife’s older than me❤


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## Michael1230nj (Jun 23, 2017)

I get that a lot Woman smiling twirling their hair trying to flirt with me. Then the alarm clock goes off and I have to drive in this crappy Gig!


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## Christinebitg (Jun 29, 2018)

Michael1230nj said:


> I get that a lot Woman smiling twirling their hair trying to flirt with me. Then the alarm clock goes off and I have to drive in this crappy Gig!


Occasionally I twirl my hair if I'm bored.


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## MadTownUberD (Mar 11, 2017)

Michael1230nj said:


> I get that a lot Woman smiling twirling their hair trying to flirt with me. Then the alarm clock goes off and I have to drive in this crappy Gig!


I get that alot too. Women from uberpeople.net smiling and talking to me in a restaurant. And then the alarm goes off!


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## OldBay (Apr 1, 2019)

As a guy, there is a HUGE difference between meeting a woman who is so attracted to you that she wants to have your babies, and meeting a woman who has you in a holding pattern or just doesn't care. All of this is decided in the first minute of meeting you; a woman runs a quick checklist on your genes (height, facial symmetry, shoulders, muscles), the way you are dressed, and your paycheck.... and comes up with an answer. Its not even worth pursuing a woman who doesn't really really want you. When a woman/girl is into you, you KNOW, then as a guy you run YOUR checklist on her. How hot? Brains? Is she a sweetheart or a *****? Your decision is based on how well you think you can do, or have done in the past. Is she up to your standards? She's really really into you? Lets make some magic.

That said, its all about context. An attractive woman in my car is not going to want me because I'm dressed like a schlep and I'm making effectively minimum wage driving around strangers. (Its not even worth trying.) However, if I meet her at work, in my element, dressed professionally and commanding the respect of my peers, she wants to have my babies. Same woman, same guy (me), different context.

When I'm driving uber I'm not trying to impress anyone, I am being humble and trying to get tips. If I brought any ego with me on my rideshare jobs, I'd have burned out in a week. Which makes this thread particularly cringe worthy. Rideshare drivers talking about hooking up wiht attractive pax, lol.


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## Old Salt (May 7, 2019)

Jesus @OldBay how may $19.95 " What Does a Woman Want" manuals did you have to buy to spill that masterpiece.

I learned everything I know about human contact from the one and only.......


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## MadTownUberD (Mar 11, 2017)

Old Salt said:


> Jesus @OldBay how may $19.95 " What Does a Woman Want" manuals did you have to buy to spill that masterpiece.
> 
> I learned everything I know about human contact from the one and only.......
> View attachment 326628


I learned everything I needed to know by reading my mom's issues of Redbook magazine as a kid.


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## Christinebitg (Jun 29, 2018)

OldBay said:


> a woman runs a quick checklist on your genes (height, facial symmetry, shoulders, muscles), the way you are dressed, and your paycheck.... and comes up with an answer.


That's leaving out an awful lot. LOL


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## OldBay (Apr 1, 2019)

Christinebitg said:


> That's leaving out an awful lot. LOL


You're right. I forgot shoe size.


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## Michael1230nj (Jun 23, 2017)

Love is Grand! First the Attraction. Then Nice easy conversation. Dinner. Laughter. Excited to see each other. Then The Restraining Orders and the Lawyers.


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## MadTownUberD (Mar 11, 2017)

Michael1230nj said:


> Love is Grand! First the Attraction. Then Nice easy conversation. Dinner. Laughter. Excited to see each other. Then The Restraining Orders and the Lawyers.


You skipped the part about the economic hardships due to having multiple children which cause stress, leading to screaming matches and shattered dinner plates over the smallest of conflicts.

Don't ask how I know...


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## ColumbusRides (Nov 10, 2018)

MadTownUberD said:


> You skipped the part about the economic hardships due to having multiple children which cause stress, leading to screaming matches and shattered dinner plates over the smallest of conflicts.
> 
> Don't ask how I know...


So true, I'm currently in marriage therapy right now ugh


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## MadTownUberD (Mar 11, 2017)

ColumbusRides said:


> So true, I'm currently in marriage therapy right now ugh


At least you're seeking help. My wife and I went to a counselor one time and she couldn't handle it...she left the appointment in tears.


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## ColumbusRides (Nov 10, 2018)

MadTownUberD said:


> At least you're seeking help. My wife and I went to a counselor one time and she couldn't handle it...she left the appointment in tears.


Wow, sorry man. I'm in therapy as a last resort. I'm kinda ready to leave but I have 2 kids so its not easy. I drive to get out the house and its been working well. The less time with the wife the better lol.


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## Michael1230nj (Jun 23, 2017)

Took me 3 Marriages to realize it wasn’t them it was me.


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## MadTownUberD (Mar 11, 2017)

ColumbusRides said:


> Wow, sorry man. I'm in therapy as a last resort. I'm kinda ready to leave but I have 2 kids so its not easy. I drive to get out the house and its been working well. The less time with the wife the better lol.


Oh we're far from last resort. We just get stressed a lot and take it out on each other. Yes driving gets me out of the house. But for the most part we're on the same page in terms of how to run the household.

Sorry to hear that. Is there any hope? Do you still find her attractive? Do you have any sort of religious faith you share? You gotta go on dates...I know I should practice what I preach because we rarely do, but it helps to just sit and talk.


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## Christinebitg (Jun 29, 2018)

OldBay said:


> You're right. I forgot shoe size.


Well, there is that. LOL

But the best part is between the ears. If that part doesn't work for me, it's probably not going to happen.

Christine


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## ColumbusRides (Nov 10, 2018)

MadTownUberD said:


> Oh we're far from last resort. We just get stressed a lot and take it out on each other. Yes driving gets me out of the house. But for the most part we're on the same page in terms of how to run the household.
> 
> Sorry to hear that. Is there any hope? Do you still find her attractive? Do you have any sort of religious faith you share? You gotta go on dates...I know I should practice what I preach because we rarely do, but it helps to just sit and talk.


It's good you're on the same page in terms on how to run the household, at least you have that in common. Honestly, I'm not attracted to my wife anymore and personality. We haven't went on dates in months and I'm ok with that. I'm not fully in my marriage, I'm just letting time pass until my kids get a bit older.


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## Michael1230nj (Jun 23, 2017)

Life’s too short to do that. Better to come from a broken home Then live in one.


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## ColumbusRides (Nov 10, 2018)

Michael1230nj said:


> Life's too short to do that. Better to come from a broken home Then live in one.


That's so true and I am constantly thinking about that... I come from divorced parents and so does my wife. My parents and my wife's parents waited until the kids got older, so essentially I'm doing the same thing. I'm repeating the cycle.


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## Michael1230nj (Jun 23, 2017)

Good Luck. Life’s hard no one gets out unscathed.


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## ZenUber (Feb 11, 2019)

Michael1230nj said:


> Took me 3 Marriages to realize it wasn't them it was me.


 I think people make the mistake of jumping from one relationship to another, without taking some time off in between to reflect. It takes two to fail a marriage.


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## OldBay (Apr 1, 2019)

ZenUber said:


> I think people make the mistake of jumping from one relationship to another, without taking some time off in between to reflect. It takes two to fail a marriage.


Women are usually the ones who initiate divorce. Finances are the primary stressor on relationships. IOW, if a man doesn't earn enough, the relationship falls apart. It may *seem* like other things, it may be *presented* as other things, but thats the basis for most divorce.

Other things may preface it. Woman is unappreciative of man. The man cheats. But.. if man was a billionaire, woman would have been kissing his ass daily. Therapist can never get a woman to say "I wanted a man who made more money so I didn't take care of our relationship." But when a guy gets caught cheating, it kinda hard to keep that hidden.


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## DrvrPaxLA (Apr 8, 2019)

away from divorce and back to attractive pax, and attraction between them and drivers...

to everyone saying that being attracted to a pax and it being odd, must not be aware of the flip side. if you check out hookup apps and sites, and things like doublelist, there are constantly listings for the fetish of meeting an U/L driver for fun. it's true that a lot, but definitely not all, are guys for guys, but looking for a "bored" driver, is totally a thing that's out there


----------



## Asificarewhatyoudontthink (Jul 6, 2017)

UberBastid said:


> As a certified and bonafied Old Guy I can tell you that someday, when you look back, it will be the chances you did NOT take that you will regret. Ask girl out and she laughs at you, yea, awful. Embarrassing. But you will live through it, and eventually forget it. Screw her. Her loss.
> The one that you didn't ask ... that's the one that will haunt you. What might have been ... you'll never know.


Except for the ones that report you, no matter where you work, if you do it on the job...then it is unemployed but no funemployment for you.

Do it yo yhe wrong female in the wrong circumstance (on recording) and you are now a registered sex offender or just have the arrest record of one because you couldn't tell she wasn't 18.

And, don't forget that, even if none of that happens you are now that "sick ****er" who did the same thing to your mother/sister/daughter that you are going to "kick the shite" out of.
Because, yeah, that is every womans dream getting hit on by every hard up nobody that "does not want a life of regrets" and lives by a "you miss all the pitches you don't swing at" mentality.

Oh, and don't forget how rapey it sounds.


----------



## UberWLA (Feb 12, 2016)

DrvrPaxLA said:


> to everyone saying that being attracted to a pax and it being odd, must not be aware of the flip side. if you check out hookup apps and sites, and things like doublelist, there are constantly listings for the fetish of meeting an U/L driver for fun. it's true that a lot, but definitely not all, are guys for guys, but looking for a "bored" driver, is totally a thing that's out there


I've said this before, in another thread, but no one seems to believe it's an actual fetish.


----------



## Michael1230nj (Jun 23, 2017)

Yeah it’s out there! Uber Drivers are putting out there


----------



## RideshareUSA (Feb 7, 2019)

Clarity said:


> The other night, as I saw this male pax approaching my car, I couldn't help but smile as soon as I realized how handsome he was. This really took me by surprise...both his look and how big I was smiling. I tried to fight the big smile at first but then I just surrendered. That made it easier for me to pleasantly greet him. His name was Tanner and for some reason that name turned me on even more. It was so fitting for his look. It didn't escalate into anything since I only speak when spoken to. I hope he thought I was cute at least.
> 
> I just felt like sharing that today.


I think I'm gonna' vomit!


----------



## BCS DRIVER (Oct 25, 2018)

RideshareUSA said:


> I think I'm gonna' vomit!


Hold it until I can pick you up on Uber. I need the cleaning fee.


----------



## DrvrPaxLA (Apr 8, 2019)

Michael1230nj said:


> Yeah it's out there! Uber Drivers are putting out there


now i guess i just gotta find the right one when i'm on the pax side. :laugh:


----------



## RideshareUSA (Feb 7, 2019)

BCS DRIVER said:


> Hold it until I can pick you up on Uber. I need the cleaning fee.


Okay, but it's gonna' be really chunky. Had extra spicy fajitas for dinner?


----------



## observer (Dec 11, 2014)

Interesting thread.

I have two short stories to share.

Many moons ago I was driving down the Harbor Freeway. I by chance looked to my right and saw a nice looking woman looking at me. I could almost see her blush when she saw me looking her way.

I kept driving down the freeway and a little bit later looked to see if she was still looking in my direction. She was and smiling.

I said to myself WTH and blew her a kiss. Her smile grew wider and she waved at me.

About a minute later she got off on the 91 freeway, and I never saw her again. :smiles:

Did I mention this was many moons ago.

My other story happened just a couple hours ago, so this thread is very timely.

I walked in to a store to buy a soda. In front of me in line was a very well built guy, I never saw his face but physically from the back was an obvious body builder. Bulging muscular legs and arms to match. I happened to be looking at the cashier when she first saw him. Her look changed from one of boredom to one of kinda shock to one of attraction, all in a matter of seconds.

I thought to myself, I wonder if she's going to look at me the same way.

She didn't. 



MadTownUberD said:


> Oh we're far from last resort. We just get stressed a lot and take it out on each other. Yes driving gets me out of the house. But for the most part we're on the same page in terms of how to run the household.
> 
> Sorry to hear that. Is there any hope? Do you still find her attractive? Do you have any sort of religious faith you share? You gotta go on dates...I know I should practice what I preach because we rarely do, but it helps to just sit and talk.


Breaking up is tough especially when kids are involved.

In my case, I kept and raised all three of my kids by myself, including my six year old daughter.

It wasn't easy.

My kids still turned out to be great kids even with their mom mostly out of the picture. I think her being gone made them stronger and more independent.

Recently their mom has consistently taken her meds (manic depression, PTSD and Fibro Myalgia probably caused by her PTSD).

Recently she has started to come around more. The kids know of her problems and still love her.

In my case, her leaving was best for everyone at the time.


----------



## Asificarewhatyoudontthink (Jul 6, 2017)

UberWLA said:


> I've said this before, in another thread, but no one seems to believe it's an actual fetish.


Difference being on the hookup site that is what they are looking for.

Getting in your car going to work or out to party with their friends is not the same thing.

Like the difference between swiping which ever direction equals hookup with someone that happens to be a barista at Starbucks and stalking your Starbucks barista.

Or, to really simplify for you folks to slow to get that you are just creepy.
The difference between fulfilling a trusting partners rape fantasy and actually raping someone just because you THINK they have a rape fantasy.


----------



## OldBay (Apr 1, 2019)

UberWLA said:


> I've said this before, in another thread, but no one seems to believe it's an actual fetish.


Its probably about as much of a fetish as plumbers (were) a fetish.




Asificarewhatyoudontthink said:


> Except for the ones that report you, no matter where you work, if you do it on the job...then it is unemployed but no funemployment for you.
> 
> Do it yo yhe wrong female in the wrong circumstance (on recording) and you are now a registered sex offender or just have the arrest record of one because you couldn't tell she wasn't 18.
> 
> ...


Unless he's attractive in which case he doesn't have to worry about any of this.


----------



## Asificarewhatyoudontthink (Jul 6, 2017)

Right, because only ugly guys rape and all women, including lesbians asexuals and married women, just can't resist a good looking guy..


Yeah, what isn't creepy about your assumptions that those situations don't happen to hot guys.


----------



## OldBay (Apr 1, 2019)

Thats a long running joke from snl skit that is occasionaly referenced. You missed it.


----------



## Christinebitg (Jun 29, 2018)

ZenUber said:


> It takes two to fail a marriage.


This is a very very wrong statement.

If the person you're married to decides they want out, there is literally nothing you can do to save the marriage. You can't make them stay.

You can be the perfect spouse. And if they bail on you, the marriage is toast. Period, full stop.

The worst ones, though, are the ones that decide to quit and stay. They don't want to get divorced, but they aren't interested in having a cooperative partnership.

I've lived through that, and I don't want to do it again. Unfortunately, my current relationship has a few of those aspects, though it is starting to slowly improve, with my partner doing some individual therapy.

Christine


----------



## ZenUber (Feb 11, 2019)

Christinebitg said:


> This is a very very wrong statement.
> 
> If the person you're married to decides they want out, there is literally nothing you can do to save the marriage. You can't make them stay.
> 
> ...


If one person wants out, then the relationship has already failed. Some people make the wrong choice in partner to begin with, and then blame it on the partner. And then there is an interaction of enabling behavior. No partner is perfect, unless one of them is Christ. If you think you were perfect and your partner is 100% to blame, you are doomed to repeat the same relationship with your next partner. If you haven't learned something from the failed relationship, it's not wise to move on. If you're not in Therapy WITH your partner, then they are moving on without you, while you sit at home sulking in your guiltless perfection complex. And no matter how much therapy your partner gets, they will never meet your expectations, and they will move on without you.


----------



## OldBay (Apr 1, 2019)

ZenUber said:


> Some people make the wrong choice to begin with. And then there is an interaction of enabling behavior. No partner is perfect, unless one of them is Christ. If you think you were perfect and your partner is 100% to blame, you are doomed to repeat the same relationship with your next partner. If you haven't learned something from the failed relationship, it's not wise to move on. If you're not in Therapy WITH your partner, then they are moving on without you, while you sit at home sulking in your guiltless perfection complex. And no matter how much therapy your partner gets, they will never meet your expectations, and they will move on to a new partner.


This might be true in some cases.

This concept is borne from couples therapy where they realize that unless the blame is spread between the parties, there is no chance for the marriage.

However,there is usually a precipitating event, and 90% of the time it is financial problems/expectations expressed by the woman. Her man doesn't make enough but she catches him playing fantasy football (has enough time for that but can't work an extra shift or get a degree), then she starts to neglect him and the marriage is effectively over.

This concept paints an ugly picture of humanity, where relationships are essentially when women trade their fertility for resources. But sadly its more true that anyone wants to admit.

Every guy knows this. Dress up and drive a nice car, it raises your profile, women express interest. A woman sees a man in casual clothes looking like a bum, driving a beater, he is instantly invisible. OTH, the way a woman dresses or the car she drives has no bearing on how attractive men think she is. Many studies done on this. Men and women not "equal" in relationships. Men are generally happy with the status quo, women want more.

It is a woman who neglects her husband when she realizes he isn't what was advertized. (Or was delusional and thought he was more than he is.) That is what ends relationships.


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## uberist (Jul 14, 2016)

I


mbd said:


> Looks- is that part of intelligence?? I think it is, I don't see any good looking hots begging on the streets.
> It is powerful
> I completely try to ignore hots, and it makes a uncomfortable ride. If you talk too much, they might think you are trying to hit on them , and if you don't talk too much, they get uncomfortable, because everybody talks to them.
> 
> ...


 LA there are hot homeless women...


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## Christinebitg (Jun 29, 2018)

ZenUber said:


> If one person wants out, then the relationship has already failed. Some people make the wrong choice in partner to begin with, and then blame it on the partner. And then there is an interaction of enabling behavior. No partner is perfect, unless one of them is Christ. If you think you were perfect and your partner is 100% to blame, you are doomed to repeat the same relationship with your next partner. If you haven't learned something from the failed relationship, it's not wise to move on. If you're not in Therapy WITH your partner, then they are moving on without you, while you sit at home sulking in your guiltless perfection complex. And no matter how much therapy your partner gets, they will never meet your expectations, and they will move on without you.


You're entitled to your opinion. But I really think you're not just wrong, but very wrong.

The examples you cited are certainly instances where there is enough blame to go around. But there are other situations in which that's not the case.

For instance, my second marriage. While we were married, my ex joined a cult. There is no other way to describe what the group is. That cult, and the resulting actions of my ex, were the main cause of the failure of our marriage.

Yes, a person can play Monday morning quarterback, and say that there were things that either of us could have done before that. That's not a worthwhile exercise. And yes, of course I could have gotten married to someone else.

None of that changes the fact that you can't stop a person who wants out, for whatever reason, whether legitimate or otherwise.


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## ZenUber (Feb 11, 2019)

Christinebitg said:


> You're entitled to your opinion. But I really think you're not just wrong, but very wrong.
> 
> The examples you cited are certainly instances where there is enough blame to go around. But there are other situations in which that's not the case.
> 
> ...


We're there any red flags before the cult?


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## Christinebitg (Jun 29, 2018)

ZenUber said:


> We're there any red flags before the cult?


Not appreciably, but I've often asked myself was there something I missed.

Perhaps a little too willingness to accept truly goofball claims about reality.

They told my ex that the ex was from Vulcan, and that I was from the Pleiades. My response to that was that I was from Toledo.


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## UberBastid (Oct 1, 2016)

Christinebitg said:


> Not appreciably, but I've often asked myself was there something I missed.
> 
> Perhaps a little too willingness to accept truly goofball claims about reality.
> 
> They told my ex that the ex was from Vulcan, and that I was from the Pleiades. My response to that was that I was from Toledo.


I think if I was you, I'd of accepted (and stuck with) Pleiades.
I mean, really, if Eliz Warran can be Native American ... you can be Pleiadian.


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## Christinebitg (Jun 29, 2018)

UberBastid said:


> I think if I was you, I'd of accepted (and stuck with) Pleiades.
> I mean, really, if Eliz Warran can be Native American ... you can be Pleiadian.


Yeah, I hear you. 

I'm by no means conservative, but Elizabeth Warren is truly a flake. She's the Democrats' answer to Michelle Bachmann.


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## ZenUber (Feb 11, 2019)

Christinebitg said:


> Not appreciably, but I've often asked myself was there something I missed.
> 
> Perhaps a little too willingness to accept truly goofball claims about reality.
> 
> They told my ex that the ex was from Vulcan, and that I was from the Pleiades. My response to that was that I was from Toledo.


Live and learn. Sounds like you've got some valuable life experience under your belt.


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## Christinebitg (Jun 29, 2018)

ZenUber said:


> Live and learn. Sounds like you've got some valuable life experience under your belt.


I tend to think of it as "tuition" in the school of life.


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## UberBastid (Oct 1, 2016)

ZenUber said:


> Live and learn. Sounds like you've got some valuable life experience under your belt.


If you live long enough, and pay attention, we all get it.
It used to be called "wisdom".


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