# You know it's time to stop driving for the day/night when...



## The Gift of Fish (Mar 17, 2017)

- You stop at a stop sign and wait for it to change

- You stop at a red light and then immediately go if it's your turn

- Someone cuts you up in traffic; you therefore want to rip his head off and then find his house and burn it down

- You need stimuli to keep from falling asleep. Anything will do. You will even start a conversation with pax.

What's your sign that it's time to call it quits and go home?


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## SEAL Team 5 (Dec 19, 2015)

The Gift of Fish said:


> What's your sign that it's time to call it quits and go home?


When the wife starts sending me dirty pictures.


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## tohunt4me (Nov 23, 2015)

Wooo hoooo !


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## Gtown Driver (Aug 26, 2018)

When I get a drunk pax that talks about spacey shit like constellations the whole ride. I have to take my brain into outer space with them to have a conversation with them and if you're fighting through traffic even worse. I can't be in outer space and in bumper to bupmer traffic at the same time.


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## tohunt4me (Nov 23, 2015)

" I am a Traveller of both Time & Space. To be where I have been "-Kashmir
Led Zeppelin


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## The Gift of Fish (Mar 17, 2017)

tohunt4me said:


> " I am a Traveller of both Time & Space. To be where I have been "-Kashmir
> Led Zeppelin


Uber does indeed charge for both time and space. Spooky.


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## tohunt4me (Nov 23, 2015)

You just waxing the Surface . . .


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## Uber Crack (Jul 19, 2017)

I drive nights...
If I don't feel 100% alert and ready to handle any situation, I go home.
If I'm not feeling sociable, I go home. 
If I feel like uber algorithm is in a bad mood with me, I go home.
If I find myself right near my house, I go home. 

If ever I get a really horrible ride, I do one more. Firstly, so that I can tell new pax what a horrible ride I just had and get a pity tip. Secondly, in case it's my last uber ride ever, so I end on a positive note, then I go home.


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## tohunt4me (Nov 23, 2015)

Go BIG
OR
GO HOME !


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## jgiun1 (Oct 16, 2017)

I actually stopped one block from a red light numerous times at night with just me in the car. 

Also done the red light stop signs....afterwards I'm like you idiot!!!!!


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## Uber's Guber (Oct 22, 2017)

The Gift of Fish said:


> What's your sign that it's time to call it quits and go home?


Sundown, yesterday.


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## SEAL Team 5 (Dec 19, 2015)

Oh I'm sorry everyone. I think you all misinterpreted my post. It's when my wife sends me a picture of our dirty kitchen,









the dirty guest bathroom,









and even the dirty grandkids playroom.









I then know it's time to call it quits and go home to clean the house before my wife goes Uber on me.


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## Danny3xd (Nov 7, 2016)

The Gift of Fish said:


> - You stop at a stop sign and wait for it to change
> 
> - You stop at a red light and then immediately go if it's your turn
> 
> ...


LoL Fish. 1 and 2 are my personal, "Yup, thats a wrap" for me.



Uber Crack said:


> I drive nights...
> If I don't feel 100% alert and ready to handle any situation, I go home.
> If I'm not feeling sociable, I go home.
> If I feel like uber algorithm is in a bad mood with me, I go home.
> ...


Purty Kool, UC.


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## The Gift of Fish (Mar 17, 2017)

Danny3xd said:


> LoL Fish. 1 and 2 are my personal, "Yup, thats a wrap" for me.


For me it's a scale. Starting to get irritable means that I've probably got around 3 hours left. Waiting for stop signs to change means that I'm getting quite close to the limit, and having to talk to pax to stay awake means that I'm looking for a parking lot immediately after that ride to get some sleep.


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## Danny3xd (Nov 7, 2016)

Yesterday, I didn't listen to sleepy, grumpy. Paid for it. Just got back up to 4.6* and was just dumb.

Where were you when I needed ya, Fish!? LoL


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## LaughingMan (Mar 20, 2018)

When some fat drunk chick decides to sit up front while her drunk friends sit in back. Oh and did I forget to mention she brought cake into the car, not on a plate or anything but in her BARE MOTHER ****ING HANDS!!! THEN SHE PROCEEDS TO EAT IT AND AFTER THE RIDE IS DONE YOU NOTICE THE ***** GOT IT ALL OVER THE PLACE!!!

*deep breath*

First time I've ever yelled at a pax, I still managed to be somewhat nice about it.

If you hate me for hating on this fat chick go for it, but when you're easily 5'2 and over 200 pounds and eating cake off your hands you deserve every insult in the world. No sympathy at all for people like that....ARGHHHHHH!!!!!

*deep breath*

I'm sorry...had to get that off my chest.


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## Stevie The magic Unicorn (Apr 3, 2018)

HotUberMess said:


> Haha don't do this, you'll be arrested for DUI





LaughingMan said:


> When some fat drunk chick decides to sit up front while her drunk friends sit in back. Oh and did I forget to mention she brought cake into the car, not on a plate or anything but in her BARE MOTHER ****ING HANDS!!! THEN SHE PROCEEDS TO EAT IT AND AFTER THE RIDE IS DONE YOU NOTICE THE ***** GOT IT ALL OVER THE PLACE!!!
> 
> *deep breath*
> 
> ...


Ok that's impressive.


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## rallias (May 16, 2018)

The Gift of Fish said:


> Uber does indeed charge for both time and space. Spooky.


Time and _relative dimensions in _space.

Also... I... uhh... the stop sign thing has happened to me.


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## MoreTips (Feb 13, 2017)

LaughingMan said:


> When some fat drunk chick decides to sit up front while her drunk friends sit in back. Oh and did I forget to mention she brought cake into the car, not on a plate or anything but in her BARE MOTHER F***ING HANDS!!! THEN SHE PROCEEDS TO EAT IT AND AFTER THE RIDE IS DONE YOU NOTICE THE ****GOT IT ALL OVER THE PLACE!!!
> 
> *deep breath*
> 
> ...


I really do welcome these moments, anything but bodily fluids. Any mess or leaving my car anything but the way you found it is a automatic cleaning fee. I seem to turn one in close to on a weekly basis. 20 here , 40 there, nothing ever fraudulent but for these super cheap rates that are partially propped up on the backs of drivers the least people can do is to respect our rides.

My last one was a construction worker nice guy but as I pulled up I saw his lunch cooler bag sitting in the dirt on the driveway. He immediately jumps in and after telling him to place it on the floormats he places it on the seat next to him. Smh, after he exits I see a perfect outline of wet sand and dirt. Snap my pics and twenty bucks paid for my frustration and 5 minutes cleaning the seat and submitting the claim. Only fair.


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## Rakos (Sep 2, 2014)

When I start thinking I'm human...

And the girls start looking really pretty...

Time to go back to the zoo...

And hang out with the other primates..8>)

And grab another bong load...8>O

Sometimes my monkey brain...

Seems so small and finite...8>)

Rakos


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## Cableguynoe (Feb 14, 2017)

jgiun1 said:


> Also done the red light stop signs....afterwards I'm like you idiot!!!!!


I had a scary one where I treated a stop light as a stop sign.


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## MadTownUberD (Mar 11, 2017)

Pretty much at the first big yawn. Assuming there's no time to go and take a power nap at the airport. Which of course I don't have time for when my day job tells me to work 54 hours.


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## Over/Uber (Jan 2, 2017)

When I take urine-smelly Harris and his 5 bags of groceries home from the store. His house smells like he does, but I helped him carry the bags inside (breathe through mouth, breath through mouth). Minimum fare but he tipped $5.


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## Pulledclear (Oct 31, 2017)

When the Meth wears off.


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## Danny3xd (Nov 7, 2016)

Hate when the meth wears off.

You, behind a dumpster wondering where your pants are. Just frustrating.


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## 1.5xorbust (Nov 22, 2017)

At 9:00 a.m. or when farts become sharts. Whichever comes first.


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## The Gift of Fish (Mar 17, 2017)

Cableguynoe said:


> I had a scary one where I treated a stop light as a stop sign.


Yes, that's no. 2 in my list. Nothing's coming - off we go!


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## Wh4tev3r!!!! (Jul 21, 2017)

When I am close to home and have no more destination filters left. Time to quit because getting a good ride will take me far away from home and I would have to dead mile it back.

When there is so much traffic, going a few miles takes 45 minutes and there is no passenger in the car. time to bail


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## Uber's Guber (Oct 22, 2017)

The Gift of Fish said:


> -What's your sign that it's time to call it quits and go home?


The very moment I put the key in the ignition and the engine starts.


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## BikingBob (May 29, 2018)

When the drunks hit the tipping point where they start hitting on me. Then I know it's dangerous out there.


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## Danny3xd (Nov 7, 2016)

When you stop for a light thinking it's a sign or versa vicea 

It's worse-er when your passenger says

"Um that's a..." the other one of which ever one you were thinking it was, than, then

I've been on the road for 4 hrs. Did 2 trips and am sitting at a veyo shop to interview. Just so burnt out!
I really am. And I love this gig.

Gonna start a thread. Been meaning to but really need some advice.
Sheet


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## Seamus (Jun 21, 2018)

The Gift of Fish said:


> - You stop at a stop sign and wait for it to change
> 
> - You stop at a red light and then immediately go if it's your turn


LOL, I thought I was the only one who ever did those 2 things!


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## Danny3xd (Nov 7, 2016)

Me too, Seamus.


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## Roger in Canton (Feb 25, 2016)

Stop at a green light, the go when it turns red!


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## Danny3xd (Nov 7, 2016)

Roger in Canton said:


> Stop at a green light, the go when it turns red!


Think that's more dain bramage. But could be wrong er....


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## Stevie The magic Unicorn (Apr 3, 2018)

You started at 4:00 am and the sun is going down.


That was me today lol


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## Danny3xd (Nov 7, 2016)

Stevie The magic Unicorn said:


> You started at 4:00 am and the sun is going down.
> 
> That was me today lol


Naw Stevie. That is a good man's hard day this time of year!


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## Stevie The magic Unicorn (Apr 3, 2018)

Danny3xd said:


> Naw Stevie. That is a good man's hard day this time of year!


I left home at 3:00 am and got home at 8:30 pm


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## Danny3xd (Nov 7, 2016)

I hope to a well deserved good meal and rest before hitting it all again!

Great honor in sweat equity.


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## Zebonkey (Feb 2, 2016)

The Gift of Fish said:


> *You know it's time to stop driving for the day/night when...*


...the trees on the side of the road start running across it or following you.


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## BlueManOC (Jun 21, 2018)

I’ve done the first two but then I decided to go home after that because I was too tired


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## wonderfulcarscent (Aug 26, 2018)

tohunt4me said:


> Go BIG
> OR
> GO HOME !


GET OUT OF MY CAR NOW AND GO HOME!



Zebonkey said:


> ...the trees on the side of the road start running across it or following you.


Reported for driving intoxicated, safety, navigation, friendliness. 1*


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## Spider-Man (Jul 7, 2017)

SEAL Team 5 said:


> When the wife starts sending me dirty pictures.


what do you do if you unfortunately don't have a Girl to send you Elicit pix?


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## x100 (Dec 7, 2015)

When you blow through 3 stop signs at 3 AM in Santa Monica and pax are all excited and cheering you.


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## mbd (Aug 27, 2018)

You see latex gloves on the ground and you think it is a condom
You read a veterinarian sign as vegetarian


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## Christinebitg (Jun 29, 2018)

1. When I start noticing little driving errors. It's a sign that I'm not as sharp as I should be.

2. When I happen to get that lucky trip that ends a mile from my house.

3. When I'm a couple of miles from the house, and I find myself saying "I hope I don't get another trip request before I get home." I'm better off if I just turn the app off now, in that circumstance.

Christine



LaughingMan said:


> When some fat drunk chick decides to sit up front while her drunk friends sit in back.


I have a stupid question. If she had been tall, you probably wouldn't have cared enough to mention it.

I can see that it's relevant that she was drunk, considering the circumstances. (Just for the record, I'm tall and height/weight proportionate.)

Why does it matter to you that she's overweight? I'm less interested in giving you a rough time about it, and moreso just wondering why it's relevant.

An honest question, mostly.

Christine


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## x100 (Dec 7, 2015)

when you feel throwing up thinking of a ride past 4 AM .


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## tohunt4me (Nov 23, 2015)

SEAL Team 5 said:


> Oh I'm sorry everyone. I think you all misinterpreted my post. It's when my wife sends me a picture of our dirty kitchen,
> View attachment 268630
> 
> 
> ...


Ive SEEN that Bathroom before !

In a " SAW" movie.


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## NYGUY (Feb 7, 2016)

When I start shaking my head like its a spray paint can to get the metal ball rattling.


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## Pax Collector (Feb 18, 2018)

The Gift of Fish said:


> What's your sign that it's time to call it quits and go home?


When I have made $550 in my first two hours.


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## TimmysBlackCarService (Aug 12, 2018)

The Gift of Fish said:


> - You stop at a stop sign and wait for it to change


Yup


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## Ping.Me.More (Oct 27, 2018)

When I rant about no navigation instructions, then eventually
discover that I had muted the sound. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯


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## The Gift of Fish (Mar 17, 2017)

When you're driving down the highway just about managing to keep it together but this is what you're seeing:










Or this:


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## nj2bos (Mar 18, 2018)

SEAL Team 5 said:


> When the wife starts sending me dirty pictures.


Lies. This only happens in the girlfriend years. Wives are shut doors.


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## El Janitor (Feb 22, 2016)

I look at how much money I made UBER before they subtract their part from me, and see how many hours I've been driving while I wait more then 15 minutes for a ping. Once I remember, " I'm making less then minimum wage", and start thinking about that belt tensioner that is making a high pitched squeal from under my hood, and how many hours of driving it will cost to replace that part,and wondering if teh $300 AC compressor might be also making a " replace me noise". That's when I go home.


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## Lissetti (Dec 20, 2016)

When you keep accepting Uberpool because your eyes can no longer make it the words Pool even on the old app.

When you don't care about 5 pax in a 4 seater. 

When you fall asleep at a red light but only another Uber driver notices and honks as he passes. Your pax are passed out in the back seat so they never saw this. 

When you realize that if you get pulled over, you would most likely fail a roadside sobriety test even though you don't have an ounce of drugs or alcohol in your system.


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## GT500KR (Jan 30, 2017)

Lissetti said:


> When you keep accepting Uberpool because your eyes can no longer make it the words Pool even on the old app.
> 
> When you don't care about 5 pax in a 4 seater.
> 
> ...


When a Rat or Black Cat crosses in front of the car!


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## Coachman (Sep 22, 2015)

When I get a ping and I'm thinking "please don't let this be a long ride" then I pretty much know it's time to go home.


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## familydriver (Sep 1, 2018)

When I get a closed call, I want to go home
When I deal with a bad pax, I want to go home ( except one time cause of music)


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## Karen Stein (Nov 5, 2016)

There aare two things that tte'll me it's time to call it a day.

First is my "stupid attack" rule. If I make a bunch of silly goofs, like missing turns, it's time to STOP.

Second sign is when it stops being fun.


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## Lissetti (Dec 20, 2016)

GT500KR said:


> When a Rat or Black Cat crosses in front of the car!


Back in my Semi truck driving days, during the holidays the dispatchers will run you hot. Once, at 3:30 am in the morning, I slammed on the brakes on a wide open and empty highway leaving 300 feet of rubber. This triggered the truck to send an alert to dispatch who sent a message asking what happened. I responded with the reply that a bull elk ran out in front of me, which I missed. I got a "Good job, drive safe " response from dispatch.

I didn't tell him the truth which was that I saw the creature from the movie Jeepers Creepers fly up my hood and land on my windshield and glaring in wickedly at me. I hadn't seen Jeepers Creepers in 5+ years at the time.

It turned out that I'd hit a large Great Horned Owl.


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## UsedToBeAPartner (Sep 19, 2016)

The Gift of Fish said:


> - You stop at a stop sign and wait for it to change
> 
> - You stop at a red light and then immediately go if it's your turn
> 
> ...


Once I see the sun go down!


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## Marshall Mathers (Dec 29, 2016)

When you use your left turn signal on a road that just naturally swerves left


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## tryingforthat5star (Mar 12, 2017)

Happened me today. Was out all weekend caught myself sitting on a green light watching the no turn on red digital sign. Said I'm done 25 hours online 48 rides and $815 time to drink some beers and relax at home.


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## UberBeemer (Oct 23, 2015)

The Gift of Fish said:


> What's your sign that it's time to call it quits and go home?


When i realize, i want to die peacefully in my sleep, like granddad. Not screaming in abject terror, like his passengers...


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## LasVegasMellowYellow (Jun 24, 2015)

When you have a quiet passenger, and you're so tired you forget that they're in the back so you hit a drive thru to grab yourself a burger, or worse case scenario, you start talking you yourself or start picking you nose. Yep! That's NEVER happened to me.

Your passenger asks "Whatcha doing buddy?"


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## Cableguynoe (Feb 14, 2017)

When I accept a pool not realizing it's pool, then I arrive at what I think is the drop off and pax doesn't move, then someone else hops in.


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## Larry$$$ (Aug 27, 2018)

When I can't find any place,tree,dark street to piss. It time to go home.
When i put Techno and house music on..and start dancing bwith the arms. It time to go home.
When I have to slap my self and singing in the car .It time to go home.


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## mbd (Aug 27, 2018)

When you reject surge....
When you say to the pax... thank you very much, while at the same time on your mind you are saying 'fumf '


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## Cableguynoe (Feb 14, 2017)

I call it quits if I drive past that same strip club and I’ve made zero.


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## KD_LA (Aug 16, 2017)

And you know you just got home from an overly long shift... when you grab your favorite frozen dinner, remember it needs four and a half minutes in the microwave, but you're stumped because you can't find the decimal point button on the keypad.
True story.


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## johnydynamic (Aug 22, 2016)

I know I’m out of it when I’m on a route I’ve done literally a thousand times and I forget which highway I’m on. 

This morning, after a 400+ mile night, I picked up a pax 2 blocks from my home. Early morning SFO run. Great. Exactly what I was hoping for to close out my night. I tell the passenger that I’ve done the drive so many times that I can do it blindfolded. Then it happened; I forgot where I was and the next thing I know is that I miss the split where left is OAK and right is SFO. Tha pax was a great guy Who didn’t mind a one exit detour and tipped me $12, but it was definitely embarrassing.


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## x100 (Dec 7, 2015)

wait what are you dealing there?



Pax Collector said:


> When I have made $550 in my first two hours.


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## SkidRow (Nov 26, 2016)

The Gift of Fish said:


> - You stop at a stop sign and wait for it to change
> 
> - You stop at a red light and then immediately go if it's your turn


 Stopping where you think a stop sign should be, even though the city put it on the cross street.



LaughingMan said:


> When some fat drunk chick decides to sit up front while her drunk friends sit in back.


 There are many Three Chick stories in the City of Endless Night.



UsedToBeAPartner said:


> Once I see the sun go down!


It's first drunk, for me.
Sometimes this is many hours before sunset.


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## Jumpin Jim (Mar 4, 2018)

SEAL Team 5 said:


> When the wife starts sending me dirty pictures.


...of the garage and reminds me I promised to clean it up.


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## donurs (May 31, 2015)

SEAL Team 5 said:


> Oh I'm sorry everyone. I think you all misinterpreted my post. It's when my wife sends me a picture of our dirty kitchen,
> View attachment 268630
> 
> 
> ...


You got my sense of humor!



LaughingMan said:


> When some fat drunk chick decides to sit up front while her drunk friends sit in back. Oh and did I forget to mention she brought cake into the car, not on a plate or anything but in her BARE MOTHER @@@@ING HANDS!!! THEN SHE PROCEEDS TO EAT IT AND AFTER THE RIDE IS DONE YOU NOTICE THE @@@@@ GOT IT ALL OVER THE PLACE!!!
> 
> *deep breath*
> 
> ...


That is hilarious!
I agree with you 100% tho.



nj2bos said:


> Lies. This only happens in the girlfriend years. Wives are shut doors.


Wisdom there!!


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## Jumpin Jim (Mar 4, 2018)

When you stop and wait at a RR crossing. Pax points out there is no train coming.


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## Rockocubs (Jul 31, 2017)

LaughingMan said:


> When some fat drunk chick decides to sit up front while her drunk friends sit in back. Oh and did I forget to mention she brought cake into the car, not on a plate or anything but in her BARE MOTHER @@@@ING HANDS!!! THEN SHE PROCEEDS TO EAT IT AND AFTER THE RIDE IS DONE YOU NOTICE THE @@@@@ GOT IT ALL OVER THE PLACE!!!
> 
> *deep breath*
> 
> ...


So if she is was skinny she could eat the cake and not get yelled at? People like what? Scary part is I dont think your issue is where it should be eating in your car.


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## Ziggy (Feb 27, 2015)

Look over and see that the driver next to me at the stop light is watching the World Series on his phone while he is driving.


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## sbstar07 (Aug 31, 2017)

When I start yawning with the customer in the car saying to myself, this is the last ride then take another and another...then the big yawn comes when your eyes start to water, time to go.


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## Uberboyz (Apr 6, 2016)

Talk with a pax? Thats really disgusting


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## Stevie The magic Unicorn (Apr 3, 2018)

You know it’s time when the police wake you up because you were slumped over the steering wheel.


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## Codyboy1 (May 21, 2018)

It was rainin hard in frisco, I needed one more fare to make my night



rallias said:


> Time and _relative dimensions in _space.
> 
> Also... I... uhh... the stop sign thing has happened to me.


Doctor uber


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## itsablackmarket (May 12, 2015)

The Gift of Fish said:


> - You stop at a stop sign and wait for it to change
> 
> - You stop at a red light and then immediately go if it's your turn
> 
> ...


I never leave home so that's not a problem. Business is too slow.


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## Cape67 (May 17, 2016)

When I turn the app on after six months, scroll past all the new terms and then realize that we are actually getting paid less than we were back in March. 

*Tap,* offline.


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## LaughingMan (Mar 20, 2018)

Rockocubs said:


> So if she is was skinny she could eat the cake and not get yelled at? People like what? Scary part is I dont think your issue is where it should be eating in your car.


I was explaining the situation that happened not specifying when I'd stop driving. Anyone that eats cake in their bare hands in my car would make me lose my mind. But hey, keep up the good work of being an idiot trying to find things to complain about.


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## Christinebitg (Jun 29, 2018)

LaughingMan said:


> was explaining the situation that happened not specifying when I'd stop driving.


I'm still wondering why you cared about whether she was height/weight proportionate. Did she at least have big boobs?

Christine


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## Mista T (Aug 16, 2017)

When you ignore a ping because you don't want to turn around and go the other way to pick up, then realise that they were a block in front of you.


When you start asking pax the same questions multiple times.


When you can't remember pax name even though they got in the car less than 10 seconds ago.


When you start to get annoyed that shuffling is too much work.


When you start in the afternoon and work the night shift and you get that first ride to the airport as the sun is peeking up.


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## beezlewaxin (Feb 10, 2015)

When I put my blinker on halfway through a lane change so it looks like I meant to do that.

When the seams between concrete segments on a highway seem bumpier than usual and driving over each one noticeably tugs my eyelids down. (e.g. Peña Blvd on way to Denver Intl Airport.)



Spoiler: I always tend to get a large coffee once it starts to get late.



I always tend to get a large coffee once it starts to get late.

Most nights I probably only drink the whipped cream off the top (thank you ampm gas stations) and I end up throwing away a half-full cup in the morning. But if I do start to get past my prime for the night it's there to drink.

I don't think the actual ingestion of a lot of caffeine matters as much as having it available when you think you need it. Also the physical act of stopping and walking into a conv store to buy a coffee is probably as useful for waking you up as drinking the coffee. All of these things work together and can be pretty effective at keeping you from becoming tired.

Extra Bonus! Your disposable coffee cup can be quickly emptied out the window and given to a pax if they think they might need it. Of course this is just in case you're not carrying puke bags..


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## kdyrpr (Apr 23, 2016)

When I can't even motivate myself to take a 2.0 surge ride because the rating of the pax is less than 4.8


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## Nitedriver (Jun 19, 2014)

You stop at a stop sign and wait for it to change

*- You stop at a red light and then immediately go if it's your turn*

You know in Philly you can run all the red lights in btween 3am to 5am not even the cops mind bout it...thats the beauty of driving @ night ..or going to the airport in 11 minutes from cc, do the same @ 7am and it takes you 45 minutes..


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## ntcindetroit (Mar 23, 2017)

When riders start judging you by your english, skin color, race, size or brand of your car instead of your driving experience and skill.


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## Tom Harding (Sep 26, 2016)

Uber Crack said:


> I drive nights...
> If I don't feel 100% alert and ready to handle any situation, I go home.
> If I'm not feeling sociable, I go home.
> If I feel like uber algorithm is in a bad mood with me, I go home.
> ...


Do you ever leave your driveway?



ntcindetroit said:


> When riders start judging you by your english, skin color, race, size or brand of your car instead of your driving experience and skill.


You forgot age and car color. They all do the above!!! Especially Uber Pool and NOW UBER EXPRESS!


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## Uber Crack (Jul 19, 2017)

Tom Harding said:


> Do you ever leave your driveway?
> 
> You forgot age and car color. They all do the above!!! Especially Uber Pool and NOW UBER EXPRESS!


Hahaha more than you'd think! Over two years now


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## beezlewaxin (Feb 10, 2015)

When the ping wakes you up.

And you still accept it.



Spoiler: Bonus points if you're asleep on your couch when this happens



Bonus points if you're at home asleep on your couch when this happens.

Extra bonus points if you are carrying your shoes as you rush out of the house.

Extra extra bonus points if you still take time to microwave a snack before leaving.


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## mr. mean gene (Jul 12, 2017)

good reason to establish more autonomous vehicle


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## beezlewaxin (Feb 10, 2015)

mr. mean gene said:


> good reason to establish more autonomous vehicle


Yes, much easier to nap in between trips while my car trolls for pings.. Heck I could even stay home and let my car do all the work.


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## Fuzzyelvis (Dec 7, 2014)

You think "I'll just close my eyes for a second or two" while driving.

You put the car in park at red lights in case you fall asleep waiting for the light to change.

It just started surging around you and you don't even care anymore.

You smell something funky and realize it's you.


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## Steelersnut (Jan 29, 2018)

Got up 330am today to start my Uber day. Every muscle in body aching from 5hrs of car repairs yesterday due to Uber wear n tear.
Read this Post and the replies and went back to bed. Didn't even set an alarm.
Thanks guys! Sincerely


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## Dollar Driver (Mar 21, 2015)

When there's nobody out but all I get are express pool requests in the middle of nowhere.


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## The Gift of Fish (Mar 17, 2017)

mr. mean gene said:


> good reason to establish more autonomous vehicle


I dream every day of establishing more autonomous vehicle.


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## mbd (Aug 27, 2018)

When you go to relieve yourself, and you start to aim your urine at a certain spot, and you actually hit it. It is like Clay Thompson hitting 14 three', or a golfer getting a double eagle... it requires the same talent and concentration.


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## beezlewaxin (Feb 10, 2015)

When you hop out of car to unload luggage... and realize that pax didn't even have luggage. Another wasted foot trip.

When your pax smacks the back of your car as you drive off for no apparent reason. Bonus if they throw something at you as you drive off chuckling at the barrel scrapings.

When your pax chases after you on foot after getting dropped off, yelling obscenities and gesturing wildly with their arms for no apparent reason.

When you find unclaimed luggage in your trunk at the end of a shift. Wtf?

Sigh.. Where does Uber/Lyft even find these pax???


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## melusine3 (Jun 20, 2016)

The Gift of Fish said:


> - You stop at a stop sign and wait for it to change
> 
> - You stop at a red light and then immediately go if it's your turn
> 
> ...


When I worked nights at a hospital (cardiac wing), I used to imagine a "code blue" happening and that would jump start my adrenaline. I guess being a driver, you might imagine someone trying to carjack you!


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## Ramrod91 (Sep 26, 2018)

The Gift of Fish said:


> - You stop at a stop sign and wait for it to change
> 
> - You stop at a red light and then immediately go if it's your turn
> 
> ...


When I get a trip to LaGuardia airport at 7am
When its super slow and lots of traffic at the same time



NYGUY said:


> When I start shaking my head like its a spray paint can to get the metal ball rattling.


Lmao


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## Cou-ber (Jul 23, 2015)

When you decide you can only buy bud with Lyft/Uber tips. 

I can’t drive straight.


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## Larry$$$ (Aug 27, 2018)

When the street you drive down all the time don't look familiar to you... it's time to go home. You brain is about to enter dream Land. Lol.


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## WillisJ (Nov 1, 2018)

When I see the sun coming up and the sunflower seeds run out...


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## Steelersnut (Jan 29, 2018)

Cou-ber said:


> When you decide you can only buy bud with Lyft/Uber tips.
> 
> I can't drive straight.


Hardcore Texas girl!


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## Rakos (Sep 2, 2014)

When you car gets repossessed...8>O


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## Cou-ber (Jul 23, 2015)

I also know when I imagine what pattern the pax’s Blood on my windshield will make when I put on the wipers to see...


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## Denver_uber_dude (Mar 22, 2016)

when its hard to speak because your mouth cannot move as fast as your brain.


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