# The problem with short skirts



## Atavar (Aug 11, 2018)

So I went to clean my car this morning and there across the tan leather of my second row seats is a smear of menstrual blood from the center to the door.. EWW!
Out came the gloves and Clorox wipes. No I'm not posting pictures. 
Gotta feel sorry for the kid, but eww...


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## Stevie The magic Unicorn (Apr 3, 2018)

Have to say this...

Vinyl or leather seats only...


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## GreatWhiteHope (Sep 18, 2018)

Kevin Kargel said:


> So I went to clean my car this morning and there across the tan leather of my second row seats is a smear of menstrual blood from the center to the door.. EWW!
> Out came the gloves and Clorox wipes. No I'm not posting pictures.
> Gotta feel sorry for the kid, but eww...


Oh god

Oh sir, you're a hero that's so gross


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## Atavar (Aug 11, 2018)

I don't want to think about the cleanup and decontamination of this happened on light colored cloth seats.


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## Uber's Guber (Oct 22, 2017)

Kevin Kargel said:


> No I'm not posting pictures.


Why bother wasting our time then. :coolio:


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## Mkang14 (Jun 29, 2019)

Not a problem with short skirts. That's a problem with proper hygiene ?.


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## Ignatz (Aug 3, 2019)

Mkang14 said:


> Not a problem with short skirts. That's a problem with proper hygiene ?.


? ? ??.......?

TMI


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## Mkang14 (Jun 29, 2019)

@Benjamin M I think this thread may interest you ?


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

Mkang14 said:


> @Benjamin M I think this thread may interest you ?


Lawd.. What now ?


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## Mkang14 (Jun 29, 2019)

Benjamin M said:


> Lawd.. What now ?


What is it you like to say TSS?


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

Mkang14 said:


> What is it you like to say TSS?


Not again! Dr. Ben in the house.. ?

Oh c'mon. This doesn't hold a flame to me picking up shit covered balls of I'm assuming TP after a fat dude.

Dr. Ben out ?


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## SinTaxERROR (Jul 23, 2019)

Kevin Kargel said:


> I don't want to think about the cleanup and decontamination of this happened on light colored cloth seats.


But you want to make us think about the cleanup and decontamination. Thanks :roflmao:


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## Uber's Guber (Oct 22, 2017)

Mkang14 said:


> Not a problem with short skirts.


Yeah! Short skirts are never a problem.
The front seat is always reserved for short skirts! :smiles:


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## SinTaxERROR (Jul 23, 2019)

Uber's Guber said:


> Yeah! Short skirts are never a problem.
> The front seat is always reserved for short skirts! :smiles:


If I was wearing a short skirt I am sure you would not want me sitting up front next to you :laugh:


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## Uber's Guber (Oct 22, 2017)

Benjamin M said:


> This doesn't hold a flame to me picking up shit covered balls of I'm assuming TP after a fat dude.


Were the balls still attached to the pax when you were performing that duty? opsies:
Asking for a friend.


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## Mkang14 (Jun 29, 2019)

Uber's Guber said:


> Yeah! Short skirts are never a problem.
> The front seat is always reserved for short skirts! :smiles:


I wore short skirts half my life. Never a smear in sight ?


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## tohunt4me (Nov 23, 2015)

Benjamin M said:


> Not again! Dr. Ben in the house.. ?
> 
> Oh c'mon. This doesn't hold a flame to me picking up shit covered balls of I'm assuming TP after a fat dude.
> 
> Dr. Ben out ?


Ew !


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## Uber's Guber (Oct 22, 2017)

Mkang14 said:


> I wore short skirts half my life. Never a smear in sight ?


Because you always ended your dates too early. :frown:


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

tohunt4me said:


> Ew !


I believe Capitan Kirk would refer to those as "Klingons"


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## SinTaxERROR (Jul 23, 2019)

Benjamin M said:


> Not again! Dr. Ben in the house.. ?
> 
> Oh c'mon. This doesn't hold a flame to me picking up shit covered balls of I'm assuming TP after a fat dude.
> 
> Dr. Ben out ?


Here ya go Ben... some are even wrapped up for you ?


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## tohunt4me (Nov 23, 2015)

SinTaxERROR said:


> If I was wearing a short skirt I am sure you would not want me sitting up front next to you :laugh:


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

SinTaxERROR said:


> Here ya go Ben... some are even wrapped up for you ?
> 
> View attachment 348366


Strangely, they didn't taste like chocolate


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## SinTaxERROR (Jul 23, 2019)

Benjamin M said:


> Strangely, they didn't taste like chocolate :frown:
> 
> View attachment 348368


Ben... question for you. In how many different locations on all your electronic devices did you save the video... "2 girls, 1 cup" ? :roflmao:


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

SinTaxERROR said:


> Ben... question for you. In how many different locations on all your electronic devices did you save the video... "2 girls, 1 cup" ? :roflmao:


?.. Hold on.. ?.. ? ? ?

I told my Dad about calls that I had. He turned green. "How does that not bother you?" I called that "Monday".

Saw two seconds that video, bailed immediately. Blood, guts, death, k. That shit (literally) no. ?


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## SinTaxERROR (Jul 23, 2019)

Benjamin M said:


> ?.. Hold on.. ?.. ? ? ?
> 
> I told my Dad about calls that I had. He turned green. "How does that not bother you?" I called that "Monday".
> 
> Saw two seconds that video, bailed immediately. Blood, guts, death, k. That shit (literally) no. ?


I think you are confusing "2 girls, 1 cup" with "the human centipede" ?


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

SinTaxERROR said:


> I think you are confusing "2 girls, 1 cup" with "the human centipede" ?


No, love that movie! ?

I'm assuming that you're talking about.. ? The Asian chicks with.. A cup.. And.. ??


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## SinTaxERROR (Jul 23, 2019)

Benjamin M said:


> No, love that movie! ?
> 
> I'm assuming that you're talking about.. ? The Asian chicks with.. A cup.. And.. ??


No Ben... I'm talking about 2 latina's and 1 glass of corona ?‍♂ :laugh:


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

Google it. Apparently it's a meme now. But I saw the video in the 90s. OMG

@Mkang14 what have you gotten me into ?

Anyway, the meme was started by a video that some may not be familiar with from the 90s. I recall them being Asian. But I bailed. Can't fap to that.. ?


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## SinTaxERROR (Jul 23, 2019)

Benjamin M said:


> Google it. Apparently it's a meme now. But I saw the video in the 90s. OMG
> 
> @Mkang14 what have you gotten me into ?
> 
> Anyway, the meme was started by a video that some may not be familiar with from the 90s. I recall them being Asian. But I bailed. Can't fap to that.. ?


Ben, you need to expand your mind. Here is a couple hits of LSD to help get you started ??


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## Mkang14 (Jun 29, 2019)

Never watched it and no desire to ??.. @Ignatz I feel your pain


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## Uber's Guber (Oct 22, 2017)

Benjamin M said:


> I'm assuming that you're talking about.. ? The Asian chicks with.. A cup.. And.. ??


They were Asian?!?
Shit, I missed that part!


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

Uber's Guber said:


> They were Asian?!?
> Shit, I missed that part!


Don't say.. Sh.. ?


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## SinTaxERROR (Jul 23, 2019)

Benjamin M said:


> Don't say.. Sh.. ?


Well, saying "fecal matter" just does not have the same effect ?‍♂ :roflmao:


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## Mkang14 (Jun 29, 2019)

Benjamin M said:


> Don't say.. Sh.. ?


That's the beauty of @Uber's Guber the double entendre


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## SinTaxERROR (Jul 23, 2019)

Look at the bright side Ben, I’m pretty sure that if either chick had TSS, that would be the least of their problems :laugh:


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

By the way, nearly 20 years later (F I'm old), I still can't eat red Jell-O after following a trail of clotted vaginal blood on a call. Oh, and also no "cottage cheese".. 

You're welcome ?


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## SinTaxERROR (Jul 23, 2019)

Benjamin M said:


> By the way, nearly 20 years later (F I'm old), I still can't eat red Jell-O after following a trail of clotted vaginal blood on a call. Oh, and also no "cottage cheese"..
> 
> You're welcome ?


Is that large curd or small curd cottage cheese? ??


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## Uber's Guber (Oct 22, 2017)

Benjamin M said:


> I still can't eat red Jell-O after following a trail of clotted vaginal blood on a call. Oh, and also no "cottage cheese"..


Pics, or it didn't happen.


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## SinTaxERROR (Jul 23, 2019)

Ben, if you could somehow relate jello chocolate pudding pops to smoking, you might just be able to quit ?


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

Uber's Guber said:


> Pics, or it didn't happen.


That would be a "Hippo" violation as one dumb CNA once said ?

Flip phone back then. Sad call (miscarriage) but even the Pt found a lil humor in the trail, all the way from the hotel room to the rig. Plop plop..


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## SinTaxERROR (Jul 23, 2019)

Benjamin M said:


> Flip phone back then.


That's what Polaroids were for. ? :laugh:


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## RideshareUSA (Feb 7, 2019)

Kevin Kargel said:


> So I went to clean my car this morning and there across the tan leather of my second row seats is a smear of menstrual blood from the center to the door.. EWW!
> Out came the gloves and Clorox wipes. No I'm not posting pictures.
> Gotta feel sorry for the kid, but eww...


Wow, talk about "leakage" ?


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## Uber's Guber (Oct 22, 2017)

Benjamin M said:


> That would be a "Hippo" violation as one dumb CNA once said ?


I would definitely feel violated! opsies:


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## Mkang14 (Jun 29, 2019)

Uber's Guber said:


> Pics, or it didn't happen.


No god please god no...


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

Mkang14 said:


> No god please god no...


Again, "Monday". Followed by lunch. ?


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## Friendly Jack (Nov 17, 2015)

Reminds me of an old saying... "I'd clean a mile of blood to see where it came from." Or something like that.


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## Uber_Yota_916 (May 1, 2017)

Another nomination for the nightmare forum.


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## mbd (Aug 27, 2018)

One day a women walks into work in a short skirt. As she’s walking to her desk she gets stopped by a co-worker, who says, “Your hair smells really nice today.” She grimaces and stomps into her manager’s office. She says,”I want to file a sexual harassment complaint!” and then relates what happened. The manager says, “What’s wrong with him complimenting how your hair smells?” Furious, she snarls, “He’s a midget!”


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

mbd said:


> One day a women walks into work in a short skirt. As she's walking to her desk she gets stopped by a co-worker, who says, "Your hair smells really nice today." She grimaces and stomps into her manager's office. She says,"I want to file a sexual harassment complaint!" and then relates what happened. The manager says, "What's wrong with him complimenting how your hair smells?" Furious, she snarls, "He's a midget!"


Reminded me of this joke.

A trucker goes to work one day. As he's checking out his rig, another driver says "man, you look bad!"

"But I feel good!"

A supervisor comes up before he goes on his run. "Man, you look bad! Go see the nurse".

"But I feel good!"

He goes to HR. The receptionist says "damn, you look bad!!"

"But I feel good!"

The nurse sees him and reads through a medical manual. "Let's see.. Looks bad, feels good..."

"Oh, here it is! You is a vagina!" ?


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## Amos69 (May 17, 2019)

Benjamin M said:


> Not again! Dr. Ben in the house.. ?
> 
> Oh c'mon. This doesn't hold a flame to me picking up shit covered balls of I'm assuming TP after a fat dude.
> 
> Dr. Ben out ?


In the biz we call those

Shitlocks!



Amos69 said:


> In the biz we call those
> 
> Shitlocks!


Sadly it is more disgusting than funny, and it happens to most guys in America, and lots of gals too.

Toilet paper actually does not clean your @$$. It does however break and shred and roll easily.


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

This seems fitting for this thread and also the infamous TSS thread.

I've been Roger ?


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## Mkang14 (Jun 29, 2019)

Benjamin M said:


> This seems fitting for this thread and also the infamous TSS thread.
> 
> I've been Roger ?


?‍♀


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## reg barclay (Nov 3, 2015)

Hi folks. Please keep the thread on topic and appropriate, thanks .


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## BeansnRice (Aug 13, 2016)

reg barclay said:


> Hi folks. Please keep the thread on topic and appropriate, thanks .


This is way off the rails.

Not one complaint about Uber nor Lyft.


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## TwoFiddyMile (Mar 13, 2015)




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## Uberdriver914 (Jun 15, 2019)

Sounds like a clean up fee if you ask me, report to Uber collect $200 pass go.


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## sellkatsell44 (Oct 25, 2015)

RideshareUSA said:


> Wow, talk about "leakage" ?


I've always been told by guys that they don't mind ?

But I've also always been +/- a couple of days so I'm used to just having to buy extras to cover the +/-.


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## RideshareUSA (Feb 7, 2019)

sellkatsell44 said:


> I've always been told by guys that they don't mind ?
> 
> But I've also always been +/- a couple of days so I'm used to just having to buy extras to cover the +/-.


OMG, way, waaaaay to much info!


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## TwoFiddyMile (Mar 13, 2015)

RideshareUSA said:


> OMG, way, waaaaay to much info!


She's punishing us.


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## SinTaxERROR (Jul 23, 2019)

TwoFiddyMile said:


> She's punishing us.


Mental images are worse than pics ?


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## BeansnRice (Aug 13, 2016)

sellkatsell44 said:


> I've always been told by guys that they don't mind ?
> 
> But I've also always been +/- a couple of days so I'm used to just having to buy extras to cover the +/-.


????


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## sellkatsell44 (Oct 25, 2015)

TwoFiddyMile said:


> She's punishing us.


??


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## wicked (Sep 24, 2017)

I had a girl like pushing her skirt down every time I checked my blind spot. 1. I'm gay and 2. If I wasn't she was a hippo


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