# RU driving w/ Penis Pains?



## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

Please be aware that it's National Prostate Month. If your over 40, it's recommended that you get it checked once a year. I can go over the states of prostate cancer death, but you already know it way high!

Get it Check or Get it Wreaked!

http://www.prostatehealthguide.com/awareness/prostate-health-month/
Personal story... when I first started driving. My penis and the surrounding area would hurt and be very sore. One day I could not take it anymore, walked into my doctors office and he told me it sounds like prostate inflammation. He checked it and said to wear different underwear. I did and even changed to a Prius... Super comfortable to drive.

Good News! no more Penis area pains and check my prostate health?!?!?! it's GOOD!


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## SinTaxERROR (Jul 23, 2019)

I can’t decide on whether to like, laugh, wow, or love your post.

I would think with a lot of us driving long hours, that one of the best things we can do is to walk around for a few minutes whenever possible. Keep circulation flowing.

Sitting to long in one position can cause much problems including blood clots that could travel to lungs, and often be fatal.


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## Rakos (Sep 2, 2014)

RU is NOT driving with penis pains...

Butt...when I pick up those cute girls...

It makes for good exercise...

And it does get very interesting...8>)

Rakos


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## Rog’O Datto (Jul 30, 2019)

Rakos said:


> RU is NOT driving with penis pains...
> 
> Butt...when I pick up those cute girls...
> 
> ...


Bad Monkey! ?


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## 1.5xorbust (Nov 22, 2017)

Samman said:


> Please be aware that it's National Prostate Month. If your over 40, it's recommended that you get it checked once a year. I can go over the states of prostate cancer death, but you already know it way high!
> 
> Get it Check or Get it Wreaked!
> 
> ...


Thanks for the warning. I already have a Prius.


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## Iann (Oct 17, 2017)

So you got fingered and then decided to buy a Prius?


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## tohunt4me (Nov 23, 2015)

Samman said:


> Please be aware that it's National Prostate Month. If your over 40, it's recommended that you get it checked once a year. I can go over the states of prostate cancer death, but you already know it way high!
> 
> Get it Check or Get it Wreaked!
> 
> ...


Penis Pain ?

Rub it out . . . . .


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## delornick94 (Aug 7, 2017)

No penis pains when driving down Western Ave


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## tohunt4me (Nov 23, 2015)

Iann said:


> So you got fingered and then decided to buy a Prius?


" Predictable " !


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## Gtown Driver (Aug 26, 2018)

If you ain't getting enough out there, you'll have those penis pains.


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## mrpjfresh (Aug 16, 2016)

Well, at least when the doctor sticks it in he or she uses a glove and lube. Uber? Yea... not so much. I've got butt pains changing undies or switching cars can't cure. Thanks Dara!



Rakos said:


> RU is NOT driving with penis pains...
> 
> Butt...when I pick up those cute girls...
> 
> ...


And the Golden Banana for Post of the Month goes to... Can always count on @Rakos for a good pick me up post. You the real Mvp - most valuable primate!


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## Coastal_Cruiser (Oct 1, 2018)

Thanks for the "tip", but just an FY1, there are other words for that part, given this is not a medical site. My wife likes "unit", with the entire package being referred to as "package".

Just sayin'.


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## W00dbutcher (Jan 14, 2019)

Rakos said:


> RU is NOT driving with penis pains...
> 
> Butt...when I pick up those cute girls...
> 
> ...


Why did I think anything but this would be rakos' reply.....


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## SuzeCB (Oct 30, 2016)

Rog'O Datto said:


> Bad Monkey! ?


Are you suggesting he needs to be spanked?


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## Gtown Driver (Aug 26, 2018)

We have our first lady to post in the penis pains thread.


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## W00dbutcher (Jan 14, 2019)

mrpjfresh said:


> Well, at least when the doctor sticks it in he or she uses a glove and lube. Uber? Yea... not so much. I've got butt pains changing undies or switching cars can't cure. Thanks Dara!
> 
> And the Golden Banana for Post of the Month goes to... Can always count on @Rakos for a good pick me up post. You the real Mvp - most valuable primate!
> 
> View attachment 354997


Seriously..... Just add KY?

Why did this have to follow her post.....


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

SinTaxERROR said:


> I can't decide on whether to like, laugh, wow, or love your post.
> 
> I would think with a lot of us driving long hours, that one of the best things we can do is to walk around for a few minutes whenever possible. Keep circulation flowing.
> 
> Sitting to long in one position can cause much problems including blood clots that could travel to lungs, and often be fatal.


Blood clots, usually deep vein thrombosis in the legs, are a huge risk for any profession that involves sitting for very long periods.

If one of those suckers breaks loose -


Heart attack
Pulmonary elbolism (clot enters the lungs and diminishes blood flow)
Stroke
Diagnosed a pulmonary elbolism once from the dispatch information. Older woman, just returned from an international flight. Sudden onset of breathing difficulty.

The good news is that this is preventable and usually survivable if you get help soon enough (that is, the ensuing MI, PE, or CVA).

Talk with your doctor about possibly starting an aspirin regimen if you are up there in years and have a family history. On the road, be sure to take a few minutes to walk around whenever you can.

And on the OP, my father is a prostate cancer survivor. A finger up the butt isn't that bad. Might actually like it :wink:


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## goneubering (Aug 17, 2017)

Featured Thread??


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

goneubering said:


> Featured Thread??


Mens health is always a Joke until ....

DEZZ NUTZZ!

butt please let the Doc check yo butt! he uses lube and will play music



Iann said:


> So you got fingered and then decided to buy a Prius?


Yeah! funny how you don't like it until you try it!?!?!?!

what else have I been missing?!?!?


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## Dropking (Aug 18, 2017)

Pleaseeeeeee!

The correct medical term for this organ is schlong dong bong bong.


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## Uber's Guber (Oct 22, 2017)

Samman said:


> RU driving w/ Penis Pains?


My penis does not pain me.
I've had women tell me my penis pains them, but my penis does not pain me.


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## Gtown Driver (Aug 26, 2018)

When you start the thread title with RU it's already instantly not serious. Then Penis Pains just makes it better.


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## losiglow (Dec 4, 2018)

dafuq?


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## TPAMB (Feb 13, 2019)

Mine are Kidney stones making their way down the pipe.


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## Lissetti (Dec 20, 2016)

I'm sorry guys....He's one of my local Seattle guys...
This is normal for our board. 

SMH he got out..


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## UberBastid (Oct 1, 2016)

If men whined as much about their chit as women did .... there would be a big Prostate Cancer push.
With people wearing high heels and running races for money, and brown magnetic ribbons on the sides of cars with "I support Prostates" on them.

But. women don't have the body shame us guys do.
You'll never see a guy jump up into stirrups, spread em and say "Hey doc, look at THIS."


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## Merc7186 (Jul 8, 2017)

I was wondering when we were going to tackle the big topics such a penis pains. The right pax can solve that issue...


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

Merc7186 said:


> I was wondering when we were going to tackle the big topics such a penis pains. The right pax can solve that issue...


Penis pain is apart of a unhealthy prostate. It's actually the signal for the beginning of male genital issues.

Yes! sitting and driving for long hours reduces the blood circulation of the scrotum... My doctor said... rest your junk by taking a walk!


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## O-Side Uber (Jul 26, 2017)




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## Gtown Driver (Aug 26, 2018)

Lissetti said:


> I'm sorry guys....He's one of my local Seattle guys...
> This is normal for our board.
> 
> SMH he got out..


I could hear him chomping on his vegetarian pita and jalopeno flavored ice cream. Gotta be pretty hip to come up with a thread like this.


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## mch (Nov 22, 2018)

Free ball it



Gtown Driver said:


> I could hear him chomping on his vegetarian pita and jalopeno flavored ice cream. Gotta be pretty hip to come up with a thread like this.


Hipsters don't use the internet anymore. They light fires on the roofs of their apt buildings and communicate with each other via smoke signal.


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## Uber's Guber (Oct 22, 2017)

Merc7186 said:


> I was wondering when we were going to tackle the big topics such a penis pains.


IDK.... when it deals with Uber/Lyft, it's always a pain in my ass. ?


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## Lissetti (Dec 20, 2016)

Just because.......


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## sellkatsell44 (Oct 25, 2015)

Uber's Guber said:


> IDK.... when it deals with Uber/Lyft, it's always a pain in my ass. ?


?


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## Mkang14 (Jun 29, 2019)

Very vile. Does anyone have directions to the dungeon ?


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## Lissetti (Dec 20, 2016)

sellkatsell44 said:


> ?


Yeah girls don't have much to say to this thread but the guys put up with us and our *TWO* tampon threads.....:roflmao::roflmao:


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## Jon77 (Dec 6, 2018)

Best title for a post ever.
I mis-read it.
I thought it asked do you guys feel da pain from the Uber corporate penis driving into your who ha.

Yes I do feel the pain.

Pi the post, humor always is therapeutic


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## Mkang14 (Jun 29, 2019)

Lissetti said:


> Yeah girls don't have much to say to this thread but the guys put up with us and our *TWO* tampon threads.....:roflmao::roflmao:


Wait there's penis pain talk ?


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## Lissetti (Dec 20, 2016)

Oh Damn! The girls arrived and barged in on the boy's Jock Talk.


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## Who is John Galt? (Sep 28, 2016)

Samman said:


> RU driving w/ Penis Pains?


Samman, you're not a sailor are you, you know a seaman?

.


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

Who is John Galt? said:


> Samman, you're not a sailor are you, you know a seaman?
> 
> .


no, just a SJW, fighting the good fight in Seattle... against nazi and republicans

JK Trump 2020!!!!


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## mikes424 (May 22, 2016)

Slightly off topic. A few years ago I had a prostate infection. I knew what it was because I had one a few months earlier. The immediate care doctor did a DRE. (I was in my early 60s). So I was on the table with the doctor's finger in me. Thinking if this was under any other circumstance.

Oh, forgot to mention. The doctor was a young, very atttactive female.


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## UberBastid (Oct 1, 2016)

Who is John Galt? said:


> Samman, you're not a sailor are you, you know a seaman?
> 
> .


When my little girl was 11, she was taking a class in school about human sexuality. Some of the questions she had she felt more comfortable asking me than the teacher, so she'd come home from school on occasion with a big question mark on her face. I could tell. We'd talk.
The class was putting on a show, or a play or something and parents were invited to the final dress rehearsal before opening night. 
Just before they went on the teacher announced a couple of changes in "a few lines that the actors were not aware of." She said "don't worry", she'd proctor and "we'll get through it."

So the setting was the beach. The line that my daughter read for the first time was, "There are seamen all over the bench." She stopped. Read it again. I just knew what she was thinking. Semen all over the bench??? I saw her upper lip curl into a big "ewwwww", then she looked RIGHT AT ME with that question mark on her face.

Then ... EVERYONE LOOKED AT ME.

Since it was absolutely quiet in this auditorium now, and since she really wasn't that far from me I said, "Just keep reading honey." Thankfully, she did, and we "got though it."

So, there's seamen and then there's semen.


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

mikes424 said:


> Slightly off topic. A few years ago I had a prostate infection. I knew what it was because I had one a few months earlier. The immediate care doctor did a DRE. (I was in my early 60s). So I was on the table with the doctor's finger in me. Thinking if this was under any other circumstance.
> 
> Oh, forgot to mention. The doctor was a young, very atttactive female.


ooooh hellll Yeah! 
please yes!
oooh God!
Come On!
I'm done


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## Uber's Guber (Oct 22, 2017)

Lissetti said:


> the guys put up with us and our *TWO* tampon threads.....:roflmao::roflmao:


Threads?.... ? 
Oh, you mean strings? :wink:


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## mikes424 (May 22, 2016)

UberBastid said:


> When my little girl was 11, she was taking a class in school about human sexuality. Some of the questions she had she felt more comfortable asking me than the teacher, so she'd come home from school on occasion with a big question mark on her face. I could tell. We'd talk.
> The class was putting on a show, or a play or something and parents were invited to the final dress rehearsal before opening night.
> Just before they went on the teacher announced a couple of changes in "a few lines that the actors were not aware of." She said "don't worry", she'd proctor and "we'll get through it."
> 
> ...


Reminds me of a joke. A male and female whale were swimming and noticed a whaling boat with a crew. Male says lets get under the boat and with our blow holes we can capsize the boat. So that is what they did. Male notices the crew are swimming so he says lets go eat them.

Female says no. You made me give a ******** but there is no way I am swallowing the seamen.


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## UberBastid (Oct 1, 2016)

Uber's Guber said:


> Threads?.... ?
> Oh, you mean strings? :wink:


I remember a date, I was in high school.
We were at a drive in movie (google it, and yea, I AM that old).

Any way, date and I were in the back seat, NOT watching the movie.
I decided to make my move and my right hand was headed way south of the border.
She moans and moves her lips close to my ear and whispers: "If you find a string down there - don't pull it."

I jerked my hand back so fast ... it was like the area was electrified. 
Mood is over ... now, back to the movie ....


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## Gtown Driver (Aug 26, 2018)

Mkang14 said:


> Wait there's penis pain talk ?
> View attachment 355162


I was wondering when the hell you were gonna come up in this thread


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## Uber's Guber (Oct 22, 2017)

UberBastid said:


> I remember a date, I was in high school. Any way, date and I were in the back seat, NOT watching the movie. I decided to make my move and my right hand was headed way south of the border. She moans and moves her lips close to my ear and whispers: "If you find a string down there - don't pull it."I jerked my hand back so fast ... it was like the area was electrified. Mood is over ... now, back to the movie ....


Which movie were you watching?
"Red Dawn" or "The Hunt for Red October" ????? opsies:


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

UberBastid said:


> I remember a date, I was in high school.
> We were at a drive in movie (google it, and yea, I AM that old).
> 
> Any way, date and I were in the back seat, NOT watching the movie.
> ...


had the same thing happened, but she was wearing pads


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## Uber's Guber (Oct 22, 2017)

Samman said:


> had the same thing happened, but she was wearing pads


_Knee _pads?.....
Did you oblige? :biggrin:


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

Uber's Guber said:


> _Knee _pads?.....
> Did you oblige? :biggrin:


ipads! get yo mine out the gutter


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## TXUbering (May 9, 2018)

This thread is sexist......


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

Gotta give a plug to my ol pal "Dr. Steve" from Pigeon Forge, TN. Host of the podcast "Weird Medicine". His sign off is "check your stupid nuts for lumps, quit smoking, get off your ass and get some exercise".

Breaking that down -


As a resident, he found himself doing a PE class in a high school - health screening / awareness. He told the boys to perform a self testicular exam. One actually found a lump. Testicular cancer is typically a young man's disease, he was treated quickly.
He smoked nearly five packs a day as a physician. He'd hold up his waiting room to chain smoke with his nurse in between patients. He says that the number one thing that finally got him to quit was learning that tobacco abuse is a leading cause of male impotence ?
He gained a few pounds and many of his fans over the years have been OTR truckers. Many callers dealing with blood clots, weight gain, diabetes, etc.
Early signs of prostate cancer are typically changes in urination (frequency, difficulty passing urine, blood - "hematuria") along with fatigue and bone pain.

But fear not, there's a simple test - the "digital rectal exam"! Sadly, it's not that kind of "digital" - find a provider with smaller fingers ?

If you are lucky, you will likely be diagnosed with BPH - "benign prostate hypertrophy" (enlarged prostate not due to cancer, common with age) or "prostatitis", often as the result of infection (as I experienced once).

My Dad was diagnosed fairly early on by a DRE, unfortunately he lost his prostate and had to deal with adult diapers way before he should have. But he's still kicking. He knew something was up and wasn't ashamed of getting the finger ?

Honestly, don't know if this is a troll thread, but it's an important topic. Hope it gets featured. :smiles:

OH! I just remembered this famous story from Steve, took place while he was in medical school. To shift topics to the ladies.

They were doing rounds and the attending asked one of the male students to perform a pelvic exam - his first. He was nervous but went in, they watched through the door.

He was polite, gentle, and made sure that the speculum was warm. He completed every single part of the process, including the bimanual and rectovaginal (aka "the shocker" ?) exams.

He left the room proud of himself and asked the attending how he did.

"Great! But maybe wear gloves next time." ? Lawd.. 



mikes424 said:


> Slightly off topic. A few years ago I had a prostate infection. I knew what it was because I had one a few months earlier. The immediate care doctor did a DRE. (I was in my early 60s). So I was on the table with the doctor's finger in me. Thinking if this was under any other circumstance.
> 
> Oh, forgot to mention. The doctor was a young, very atttactive female.


Not off topic at all!

Kudos for getting checked. And my preference is female docs. Smaller fingers and, at least for me, it's less awkward ?


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

Benjamin M said:


> Gotta give a plug to my ol pal "Dr. Steve" from Pigeon Forge, TN. Host of the podcast "Weird Medicine". His sign off is "check your stupid nuts for lumps, quit smoking, get off your ass and get some exercise".
> 
> Breaking that down -
> 
> ...


Nice write up Ben!

Happy Prostate Cancer Awareness Month!

Don't forget your yearly fingering!


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## MadePenniesToday (Feb 24, 2017)

Samman said:


> Please be aware that it's National Prostate Month. If your over 40, it's recommended that you get it checked once a year. I can go over the states of prostate cancer death, but you already know it way high!
> 
> Get it Check or Get it Wreaked!
> 
> ...


 The "no more penis" stood out and made me feel bad for you for a second, but then I kept reading.


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

MadePenniesToday said:


> The "no more penis" stood out and made me feel bad for you for a second, but then I kept reading.


grammer an't my thing brah.. I'm try to read more so I can set up my writing game!


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## 25rides7daysaweek (Nov 20, 2017)

Samman said:


> Mens health is always a Joke until ....
> 
> DEZZ NUTZZ!
> 
> ...


I was just scheduled for a colonoscopy....


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## UberBastid (Oct 1, 2016)

Uber's Guber said:


> Which movie were you watching?
> "Red Dawn" or "The Hunt for Red October" ????? opsies:


LoL
Easy Rider ... and I've never yet seen the whole movie at one time.


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## TwoFiddyMile (Mar 13, 2015)

IM PEEING RIGHT NOW AND IT STILL FEELS LIKE I NEED TO PEE!


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

TwoFiddyMile said:


> IM PEEING RIGHT NOW AND IT STILL FEELS LIKE I NEED TO PEE!


If you're serious, that's a potential symptom of prostate issues.


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## Rakos (Sep 2, 2014)

TwoFiddyMile said:


> IM PEEING RIGHT NOW AND IT STILL FEELS LIKE I NEED TO PEE!


Old age...

Diabetes....

Or both....8>)

Get used to it...

Rakos


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

TwoFiddyMile said:


> IM PEEING RIGHT NOW AND IT STILL FEELS LIKE I NEED TO PEE!


sounds painful


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## TwoFiddyMile (Mar 13, 2015)

Benjamin M said:


> If you're serious, that's a potential symptom of prostate issues.


I'm jokingly serious. I've had an enlarged prostate for years. Go ahead, feel it! LOL


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## UberBastid (Oct 1, 2016)

Rakos said:


> Old age...
> 
> Diabetes....
> 
> ...


High blood pressure,
nerve damage lower back,
arthritis,
and according to Mrs. B ... early onset dementia


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## TwoFiddyMile (Mar 13, 2015)

UberBastid said:


> High blood pressure,
> nerve damage lower back,
> arthritis,
> and according to Mrs. B ... early onset dementia


You'll forget all about it tomorrow.


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## UberBastid (Oct 1, 2016)

TwoFiddyMile said:


> You'll forget all about it tomorrow.


Huh?
Forget about what?


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## SuzeCB (Oct 30, 2016)

UberBastid said:


> High blood pressure,
> nerve damage lower back,
> arthritis,
> and according to Mrs. B ... early onset dementia


Did you forget your anniversary again? LOL


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## UberBeemer (Oct 23, 2015)

I am thinking this post was a loaded question in the form of a PSA. 

No pains there, but there have been a lot of pains in the ass in the back seat.


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

UberBeemer said:


> I am thinking this post was a loaded question in the form of a PSA.
> 
> No pains there, but there have been a lot of pains in the ass in the back seat.


I agree. And a good PSA.

It's a touchy subject for men but we have things way better than the ladies - oh, the horror ?

If you have a family history of prostate cancer or you're of a certain age, get fingred. It doesn't dimish your masculinity and it's over quickly.

The alternative, down the road, is only a bit worse than a finger up your butt.


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## UberBeemer (Oct 23, 2015)

Just make sure the doctor doesnt have both hands on your hips.


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

UberBeemer said:


> Just make sure the doctor doesnt have both hands on your hips.


As I've said on this thread, find a good female provider. Smaller fingers 

Oh, and the above illustration? My Dad had to go through that. Male urologist but he was at a teaching hospital, got to be the first time for a young female resident ?

He wasn't amused but let her practice 

Oh, and as for "PSA", that also refers to "Prostate Specific Antigen".

Not the best screening method out there, lots of false positives, but it's an option. Usually goes with the finger (DRE).


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## Juggalo9er (Dec 7, 2017)

Yes.... from my woman riding it.... couldn't resist


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## TwoFiddyMile (Mar 13, 2015)

Juggalo9er said:


> Yes.... from my woman riding it.... couldn't resist


Pegged?
I'm talking cribbage here of course...


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## Lowestformofwit (Sep 2, 2016)

I've been mislead!
I saw the title and thought it was about picking up d i c khead pax.
In other news, especially for @SuzeCB:


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## gw03081958 (Jun 28, 2016)

Samman said:


> Please be aware that it's National Prostate Month. If your over 40, it's recommended that you get it checked once a year. I can go over the states of prostate cancer death, but you already know it way high!
> 
> Get it Check or Get it Wreaked!
> 
> ...


Sometimes a change is good, there are many aberrations walking on earth.


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## Lowestformofwit (Sep 2, 2016)

Lissetti said:


> Yeah girls don't have much to say to this thread but the guys put up with us and our *TWO* tampon threads.....:roflmao::roflmao:


Haven't seen them.
Probably just padding.
And why two threads - pulling on one ripcord is generally enough to "open the 'chute".
"If you want to see me do my thing
Pull my string..."



Benjamin M said:


> As I've said on this thread, find a good female provider. Smaller fingers :wink:


@Direwolfismyspiritanimal keeps saying she's got small hands.
There could be an opening there for her.
In a manner of speaking...


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## SFOspeedracer (Jun 25, 2019)

UberBastid said:


> I remember a date, I was in high school.
> We were at a drive in movie (google it, and yea, I AM that old).
> 
> Any way, date and I were in the back seat, NOT watching the movie.
> ...


Don't think there's one guy who can say they don't have their own rendition of this lol .. mine did not involve a movie


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## Lowestformofwit (Sep 2, 2016)

SFOspeedracer said:


> Don't think there's one guy who can say they don't have their own rendition of this lol .. mine did not involve a movie


The old joke:
Guy says to girl: "Do you want to go to the movies tonight?"
"That'd be nice".
"Drive in or city cinema?"
"It's immaterial".
"Looks like we'd better go to the city, then".


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## Lissetti (Dec 20, 2016)

Lowestformofwit said:


> Haven't seen them.


Well since you asked for it....

https://uberpeople.net/threads/medical-emergency.343831/
https://uberpeople.net/threads/dusgusting-blood-on-my-seats.243154/


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## Lovelife (May 16, 2019)

Samman said:


> Please be aware that it's National Prostate Month. If your over 40, it's recommended that you get it checked once a year. I can go over the states of prostate cancer death, but you already know it way high!
> 
> Get it Check or Get it Wreaked!
> 
> ...


Dude, TMI!!!


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## tohunt4me (Nov 23, 2015)

Samman said:


> Penis pain is apart of a unhealthy prostate. It's actually the signal for the beginning of male genital issues.
> 
> Yes! sitting and driving for long hours reduces the blood circulation of the scrotum... My doctor said... rest your junk by taking a walk!


Take your Penis for a walk . . .

Sorry
But they wont let me post penis on a leash pictures here . . . .

I BET i could find a pic for it.



Mkang14 said:


> Wait there's penis pain talk ?
> View attachment 355162


No " cape" ?


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

Lovelife said:


> Dude, TMI!!!


it is.... but it's also Prostate Cancer awareness month. And, we should be aware that:

2019 - 31,640 prostate cancer death
2019 - 176,000 new prostate cancer
2019 - 5.2% deaths rate

Early detection survival rate 98%
How many lives can TMi SAVE?!?!?!?

Yeah! Dezz Nutzzz


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## Mkang14 (Jun 29, 2019)

tohunt4me said:


> Take your Penis for a walk . . .
> 
> Sorry
> But they wont let me post penis on a leash pictures here . . . .
> ...


Surprisingly not too many great gifts of women jumping off cliffs ? .. the Cape is under the shirt ?‍♀


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## SuzeCB (Oct 30, 2016)

Lowestformofwit said:


> I've been mislead!
> I saw the title and thought it was about picking up d i c khead pax.
> In other news, especially for @SuzeCB:
> View attachment 355672


Hey! I'm not the one that said he was bad! LOL


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## SFOspeedracer (Jun 25, 2019)

Lowestformofwit said:


> The old joke:
> Guy says to girl: "Do you want to go to the movies tonight?"
> "That'd be nice".
> "Drive in or city cinema?"
> ...


what do a woman and a bar have in common?
_.. Liquor in the front, poker in the back_


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

Remind to all males or females with Prostate! Get it check! 

Your family will thank you!


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## TwoFiddyMile (Mar 13, 2015)

Samman said:


> Remind to all males or females with Prostate! Get it check!
> 
> Your family will thank you!


My doc said in 35 years of checking prostates he never felt a big one.
You can do whatever you want with that statement.
Personally, I left it alone.


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

TwoFiddyMile said:


> My doc said in 35 years of checking prostates he never felt a big one.
> You can do whatever you want with that statement.
> Personally, I left it alone.


I would get a second opinion. CVS Mini Clinic don't really counts as a "Doctor"


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## TwoFiddyMile (Mar 13, 2015)

Samman said:


> I would get a second opinion. CVS Mini Clinic don't really counts as a "Doctor"


Hey man
He has a diploma on the wall.
No way it's counterfeit.


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

TwoFiddyMile said:


> Hey man
> He has a diploma on the wall.
> No way it's counterfeit.


I got a 2 year Community College degree.. took me 4 years to get


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## TwoFiddyMile (Mar 13, 2015)

They now have medicine for enlarged prostate. Propecia™.
READ THE FINE PRINT!
Propecia shrinks the prostate. Leads to impotence. AND CAN BRING ON PROSTATE CANCER.


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## UberBastid (Oct 1, 2016)

My PSA spiked a year ago.
Doc told me that at my age, ''the chances of you dying from Prostate cancer is almost nil. It is a very slow moving cancer. With very few exceptions, it takes up to 20 years."
When I'm 85, I'll be ready to die ... 
Till then, I'll NOT be incontinent and WILL get wood when appropriate.


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## TwoFiddyMile (Mar 13, 2015)

UberBastid said:


> My PSA spiked a year ago.
> Doc told me that at my age, ''the chances of you dying from Prostate cancer is almost nil. It is a very slow moving cancer. With very few exceptions, it takes up to 20 years."
> When I'm 85, I'll be ready to die ...
> Till then, I'll NOT be incontinent and WILL get wood when appropriate.


That's pretty optimistic. I just started kagels.


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## UberBastid (Oct 1, 2016)

TwoFiddyMile said:


> That's pretty optimistic. I just started kagels.


What is?
That I won't be incontinent? Or will get wood?


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

UberBastid said:


> What is?
> That I won't be incontinent? Or will get wood?


Get Wood! show people you still got good blood flow


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## TwoFiddyMile (Mar 13, 2015)

UberBastid said:


> What is?
> That I won't be incontinent? Or will get wood?


Just do the kagels. Then you WONT be incontinent and WILL get wood.


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## SuzeCB (Oct 30, 2016)

UberBastid said:


> My PSA spiked a year ago.
> Doc told me that at my age, ''the chances of you dying from Prostate cancer is almost nil. It is a very slow moving cancer. With very few exceptions, it takes up to 20 years."
> When I'm 85, I'll be ready to die ...
> Till then, I'll NOT be incontinent and WILL get wood when appropriate.


At 84 you may change your opinion about dying... ?


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## Luber4.9 (Nov 25, 2015)

Get a detachable penis.


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## Oscar Levant (Aug 15, 2014)

Samman said:


> Please be aware that it's National Prostate Month. If your over 40, it's recommended that you get it checked once a year. I can go over the states of prostate cancer death, but you already know it way high!
> 
> Get it Check or Get it Wreaked!
> 
> ...


I"m 68 and it's a constant struggle. I"ve discovered that eating a big bowl of lightly steamed brocolli every day ( I eat it in the morning, with a sausage patty ) keeps the prostrate from growing (I'm sure there are other veggies, but I think the cruciferous veggies are best ), and the urine flows very well. When I go off that diet, the problem occurs again, especially if I eat salty fast food for a day or two. There's a suppliment I take which I buy from Amazon, as well, so PM if anyone is interested, I swear by the stuff.


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

Oscar Levant said:


> I"m 68 and it's a constant struggle. I"ve discovered that eating a big bowl of lightly steamed brocolli every day ( I eat it in the morning, with a sausage patty ) keeps the prostrate from growing (I'm sure there are other veggies, but I think the cruciferous veggies are best ), and the urine flows very well. When I go off that diet, the problem occurs again, especially if I eat salty fast food for a day or two. There's a suppliment I take which I buy from Amazon, as well, so PM if anyone is interested, I swear by the stuff.


Dies it matter if it's frozen? costco sells good frozen organic broccoli for cheap


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## Oscar Levant (Aug 15, 2014)

Samman said:


> Dies it matter if it's frozen? costco sells good frozen organic broccoli for cheap


Not sure, research it.


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

Oscar Levant said:


> Not sure, research it.


thanks for the reminder, I did 2 morning of broccoli and then completely forgot


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## doyousensehumor (Apr 13, 2015)

Samman said:


> thanks for the reminder, I did 2 morning of broccoli and then completely forgot


Dont forget the special seasoning for that broccoli


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## Oscar Levant (Aug 15, 2014)

doyousensehumor said:


> Dont forget the special seasoning for dat broccoli


I like garlic butter.


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

Oscar Levant said:


> I like garlic butter.


I go through 3 sticks of butter every 10 days! love some good Irish and french butter


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## TwoFiddyMile (Mar 13, 2015)

Kagels.
Just did a set.


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## delornick94 (Aug 7, 2017)

Hell no. Nothing is going up there to check my prostate.


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## RideshareUSA (Feb 7, 2019)

Uber's Guber said:


> My penis does not pain me.
> I've had women tell me my penis pains them, but my penis does not pain me.


Ok, I believe you.
However you have'nt told us what your hand, tells your penis?


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

delornick94 said:


> Hell no. Nothing is going up there to check my prostate.


you want the death figures? it's more than, gun shot crimes and fist beating?!?!

take a finger or take a fist?!?! your choice bra!


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## mch (Nov 22, 2018)

Great thread. Like you said, an important topic that should be taken seriously.


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## itendstonight (Feb 10, 2019)

Benjamin M said:


> Blood clots, usually deep vein thrombosis in the legs, are a huge risk for any profession that involves sitting for very long periods.
> 
> If one of those suckers breaks loose -
> 
> ...


Is aspirin really a safe long term solution to prevent clots?


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## gooddolphins (Apr 5, 2018)

No penis pain but I notice pain in one butt cheek and I have to roll over on my other cheek at times. I guess I’ve got a big butt and I cannot lie


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

itendstonight said:


> Is aspirin really a safe long term solution to prevent clots?


i'm 40 now, so my new shit us CQ10, Tumric, Vit D, and a C compex!

feels good man


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## TemptingFate (May 2, 2019)

gooddolphins said:


> No penis pain but I notice pain in one butt cheek and I have to roll over on my other cheek at times. I guess I've got a big butt and I cannot lie


I thought it might be that you're sitting on a fat wallet but then I remembered that you're an Uber driver.


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## gooddolphins (Apr 5, 2018)

TemptingFate said:


> I thought it might be that you're sitting on a fat wallet but then I remembered that you're an Uber driver.


No actually that is the issue for real. When my cheek starts hurting I put my wallet in my front pants and it stops hurting


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## FormerTaxiDriver♧ (Apr 5, 2018)

Samman said:


> Please be aware that it's National Prostate Month. If your over 40, it's recommended that you get it checked once a year. I can go over the states of prostate cancer death, but you already know it way high!
> 
> Get it Check or Get it Wreaked!
> 
> ...


No thank you, not getting my butt fingered!


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

itendstonight said:


> Is aspirin really a safe long term solution to prevent clots?


Great question!

Generally, yes. But don't take my word for it, I'm just some asshole on the internet. Talk with your doctor. There are some contraindications.

Aspirin, specially chewable baby aspirin (less likely to cause vomiting and faster acting), was a drug that I gave often for chest pain and possible CVA (stroke). A regimine is thought to reduce the risk factors of both, particularly for older people.


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## itendstonight (Feb 10, 2019)

FormerTaxiDriver♧ said:


> No thank you, not getting my butt fingered!


I'm scared to get it tested and I'm reaching that age. Not sure if PSA blood test is a total substitue. Not sure if a young female doctor would be better or worst than a male doctor or older female doctor doing it ...


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## FormerTaxiDriver♧ (Apr 5, 2018)

itendstonight said:


> I'm scared to get it tested and I'm reaching that age. Not sure if PSA blood test is a total substitue. Not sure if a young female doctor would be better or worst than a male doctor or older female doctor doing it ...


Older women are better lovers.


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## itendstonight (Feb 10, 2019)

Benjamin M said:


> Great question!
> 
> Generally, yes. But don't take my word for it, I'm just some @@@@@@@ on the internet. Talk with your doctor. There are some contraindications.
> 
> Asprin, specially chewable baby aspirin (less likely to cause vomiting and faster acting), was a drug that I gave often for chest pain and possible CVA (stroke). A regimine is thought to reduce the risk factors of both, particularly for older people.


Was thinking, should all older men carry aspirin around with them in their bag or person as a back up if they suspect a heart attack? Will it increase Survivability to take on onset of the heart attack just before going to the hospital?


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

gooddolphins said:


> No actually that is the issue for real. When my cheek starts hurting I put my wallet in my front pants and it stops hurting


Bingo.

This definitely reduces blood flow and has been a concern for anyone driving for extended pariods - truck drivers, taxi drivers, RS, police officers, etc etc.

If you keep your wallet in your back pocket, keep it light. No coins or other crap. Otherwise, front pocket. Just do first responders a favor and keep it on your body in case of the worst. "Find the wallet" wasn't a fun game.


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## gooddolphins (Apr 5, 2018)

itendstonight said:


> I'm scared to get it tested and I'm reaching that age. Not sure if PSA blood test is a total substitue. Not sure if a young female doctor would be better or worst than a male doctor or older female doctor doing it ...


Female doctor is best. Smaller hands. You don't want a doctor that was a college quarterback


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

gooddolphins said:


> No actually that is the issue for real. When my cheek starts hurting I put my wallet in my front pants and it stops hurting


I switched to a Prius! instant relief


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

FormerTaxiDriver♧ said:


> No thank you, not getting my butt fingered!


Hey, don't beat it til you try it! &#128514;

My Dad would not be alive right now if not for getting fingered many years ago. Facts.


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

gooddolphins said:


> Female doctor is best. Smaller hands. You don't want a doctor that was a college quarterback


I has a female doctor with man hands! hurt bad


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

itendstonight said:


> Was thinking, should all older men carry aspirin around with them in their bag or person as a back up if they suspect a heart attack? Will it increase Survivability to take on onset of the heart attack just before going to the hospital?


Again, talk with your doctor. And, again, generally speaking - yes. Chewable aspirin nearby isn't a bad idea.

And not just older men, women too.


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## itendstonight (Feb 10, 2019)

Benjamin M said:


> Again, talk with your doctor. And, again, generally speaking - yes. Chewable aspirin nearby isn't a bad idea.
> 
> And not just older men, women too.


I'm 30 and don't have high BP &#128514; just thinking ahead of the curve. Part of my general anxiety ...


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

itendstonight said:


> I'm 30 and don't have high BP &#128514; just thinking ahead of the curve. Part of my general anxiety ...


Heart disease knows no age, my friend.

But DO NOT start an aspirin regime, no matter what your age, without consulting a doctor. Need to make sure that your clotting is normal.


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## FormerTaxiDriver♧ (Apr 5, 2018)

Benjamin M said:


> Hey, don't beat it til you try it! &#128514;
> 
> My Dad would not be alive right now if not for getting fingered many years ago. Facts.


Did you like it???


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## Benjamin M (Jul 17, 2018)

FormerTaxiDriver♧ said:


> Did you like it???


Did I like my Dad surviving prostate cancer? Yep, sure did!!


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## FormerTaxiDriver♧ (Apr 5, 2018)

Benjamin M said:


> Did I like my Dad surviving prostate cancer? Yep, sure did!!


Don't go putting words in my mouth. I asked if you liked getting your butt fingered?

&#129322;


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## Timbrr (Mar 1, 2019)

Rog'O Datto said:


> Bad Monkey! ?


Yes bad monkey. Monkey should be spanked.

Sorry, couldn't help it.


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## FormerTaxiDriver♧ (Apr 5, 2018)

Timbrr said:


> Yes bad monkey. Monkey should be spanked.
> 
> Sorry, couldn't help it.


Yes, bad! Got hub caps missing?


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## Friendly Jack (Nov 17, 2015)

I have been a member of this site for several years and frequently post light-hearted comments. On this subject I will be quite serious... 

As a prostate cancer survivor I will strongly recommend to every male over the age of 50 to have an annual prostate examination and PSA testing on a frequency advised by your doctor. Your life may depend on it. 

I had had a couple digital prostate examinations over the years and never had any of the symptoms associated with an enlarging prostate. My doctor nonetheless recommended that I have a PSA test and I thought that was a waste of time. 

That initial PSA test saved my life. The results were off the charts and subsequent testing found a very aggressive prostate cancer that had also invaded my seminal vessels and pelvic lymph nodes. The scary part is that I never felt anything that gave any indication that I was in very grave danger. 

Few men like being examined. A digital examination is uncomfortable and the blood draw required for PSA testing is frequently avoided by those afraid of needles. But, trust me, you would have that done every week to avoid going through what thus far I have survived. That isn't meant to scare you, it's just the truth.

Guys over 50, do yourself and family a great favor: Get tested if you have not already done so. It's much easier than the alternative!


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## The queen 👸 (Jan 2, 2020)

Samman said:


> Please be aware that it's National Prostate Month. If your over 40, it's recommended that you get it checked once a year. I can go over the states of prostate cancer death, but you already know it way high!
> 
> Get it Check or Get it Wreaked!
> 
> ...


I think you need more sex. Good luck &#128077;&#127808;


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

The queen &#128120; said:


> I think you need more sex. Good luck &#128077;&#127808;


Thanks! any tips?



Friendly Jack said:


> I have been a member of this site for several years and frequently post light-hearted comments. On this subject I will be quite serious...
> 
> As a prostate cancer survivor I will strongly recommend to every male over the age of 50 to have an annual prostate examination and PSA testing on a frequency advised by your doctor. Your life may depend on it.
> 
> ...


thanks man! I'm super afraid of the look of a needle, it's an ordeal I have to fight with. I would rather get digit in the butthle than deal with a needle


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## UberBastid (Oct 1, 2016)

The queen &#128120; said:


> I think you need more sex. Good luck &#128077;&#127808;





Samman said:


> Thanks! any tips?


Yea, here's a tip ...
in case of urgent need I found this to be a very effective female viagra ...
You can increase the dosage until you achieve the desired reaction.


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

UberBastid said:


> Yea, here's a tip ...
> in case of urgent need I found this to be a very effective female viagra ...
> You can increase the dosage until you achieve the desired reaction.
> 
> View attachment 406793


best post ever


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## got a p (Jan 27, 2018)

Samman said:


> Please be aware that it's National Prostate Month. If your over 40, it's recommended that you get it checked once a year. I can go over the states of prostate cancer death, but you already know it way high!
> 
> Get it Check or Get it Wreaked!
> 
> ...


Rub some mentholated cbd ointment on it every day. Make sure to take your time and massage it in there real good &#127814; &#128077;


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## peteyvavs (Nov 18, 2015)

Samman said:


> Please be aware that it's National Prostate Month. If your over 40, it's recommended that you get it checked once a year. I can go over the states of prostate cancer death, but you already know it way high!
> 
> Get it Check or Get it Wreaked!
> 
> ...


Tell the truth, you had the hots for your doctor and you wanted the digital exam &#128513;


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## The queen 👸 (Jan 2, 2020)

Samman said:


> Thanks! any tips?
> 
> 
> thanks man! I'm super afraid of the look of a needle, it's an ordeal I have to fight with. I would rather get digit in the butthle than deal with a needle


Ask your wife to help you out


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

The queen &#128120; said:


> Ask your wife to help you out


you can be my wife


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## The queen 👸 (Jan 2, 2020)

Samman said:


> you can be my wife


You can't handle me baby. I am very demanding .


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

The queen &#128120; said:


> You can't handle me baby. I am very demanding .


yeah, I got nice Uber money... want to keep it... thank goodness for hookers


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## The queen 👸 (Jan 2, 2020)

Samman said:


> yeah, I got nice Uber money... want to keep it... thank goodness for hookers


I had my 50 birthday at a very known at a gentlemen place. Loved those ladies . Best party I ever had.


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## got a p (Jan 27, 2018)




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## The queen 👸 (Jan 2, 2020)

got a p said:


>


 Grow a pair mate


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## got a p (Jan 27, 2018)

The queen &#128120; said:


> Grow a pair mate


I'm guessing you didn't see this masterpiece of a movie


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## The queen 👸 (Jan 2, 2020)

got a p said:


> I'm guessing you didn't see this masterpiece of a movie


What movie?


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## Dekero (Sep 24, 2019)

Yeah.... Ummmm My Pee Pee hurts.


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

The queen &#128120; said:


> I had my 50 birthday at a very known at a gentlemen place. Loved those ladies . Best party I ever had.


nice! did you check their parastate? community service!


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## The queen 👸 (Jan 2, 2020)

Samman said:


> nice! did you check their parastate? community service!


It was in DC. Actually I am now a good friend with one of the dancers. A lively woman in her 30 with 2 kids. Makes good money and send her kids to private school .



The queen &#128120; said:


> It was in DC. Actually I am now a good friend with one of the dancers. A lively woman in her 30 with 2 kids. Makes good money and send her kids to private school .


and I applaud women like that. I have more respect for women like her that some bored stay at home woman wearing her fake leggings complaining and not cooking dinner for their kids.


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## FormerTaxiDriver♧ (Apr 5, 2018)

got a p said:


> Rub some mentholated cbd ointment on it every day. Make sure to take your time and massage it in there real good &#127814; &#128077;


Got any samples???



got a p said:


>


That's how it goes when some guy has the clap, or kidney stones passing through. Anyone on here ever had THE CLAP?


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## Virginia is for lovers (Nov 22, 2019)

Drink lots of water, sleep naked(my theory 😁) at night, you will be fine. And work out is important.


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## UberBastid (Oct 1, 2016)

got a p said:


> I'm guessing you didn't see this masterpiece of a movie





The queen &#128120; said:


> What movie?


Something About Mary
I haven't seen that in ages, and now I wanna see it again.
Funny as ****.
I laughed through the whole thing - and I wasn't even high.


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## Virginia is for lovers (Nov 22, 2019)

Butt problem is more serious than penis problem in this line of business 🙈


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## UberBastid (Oct 1, 2016)

Virginia is for lovers said:


> Butt problem is more serious than penis problem in this line of business &#128584;


I used to work with an ER doc who claimed that there is three parts on everyone's body that - if it hurts - you in a lot of pain: Your teeth, your ass-hole, and your feet. Morphine.


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## Virginia is for lovers (Nov 22, 2019)

UberBastid said:


> I used to work with an ER doc who claimed that there is three parts on everyone's body that - if it hurts - you in a lot of pain: Your teeth, your ass-hole, and your feet. Morphine.


Piles is an example of that. Being impotent is better than having piles, it is literally pain in the ass &#128513;


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## VanGuy (Feb 15, 2019)

The queen &#128120; said:


> It was in DC. Actually I am now a good friend with one of the dancers. A lively woman in her 30 with 2 kids. Makes good money and send her kids to private school .
> 
> 
> and I applaud women like that. I have more respect for women like her that some bored stay at home woman wearing her fake leggings complaining and not cooking dinner for their kids.


So you've met my exwife?


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## UberBastid (Oct 1, 2016)

VanGuy said:


> So you've met my exwife? :smiles:


who hasn't ...


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

VanGuy said:


> So you've met my exwife? :smiles:


I have! lol &#129362;&#127849;=&#127825;


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## VanGuy (Feb 15, 2019)

Samman said:


> I have! lol &#129362;&#127849;=&#127825;


Hahahaha, I'm a big man, she's bigger. You couldn't handle that my boy.


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## Samman (Aug 10, 2019)

VanGuy said:


> Hahahaha, I'm a big man, she's bigger. You couldn't handle that my boy. :smiles:


Try me brah! I've had plenty of fatties! well. 4-5 chubbies and 3 softball lesbian (so not fat)


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